No, not a stupid Martin Luther King dream, but a real dream.

I was invited onto the Late, Late Show to, apparently, talk about my book. Anyway, after a couple of minutes of the interview it turns out I was completely set up.

Pat Kenny had notes from my blog posts of old and was saying “Do you remember when you said this about such and such” or “And what about the time you called so and so this that and the other”. Then, as I was sitting there, studio lights glaring less than the studio audience who were extremely hostile to me for some reason, he started to bring these people out from behind the scenes.

It was like ‘This is your life’, except it should have been ‘This is your twat’.

Each of these people then got a chance to berate me live on television whilst I sat there. After a while Pat Kenny said “So, what do you think about that then? It’s not so nice when people call you names, is it?”.

After a pause, I replied “Makes no odds to me and you are one small-time cunt for pulling this kind of shit”.

The dream then went to next day where the Irish Times front page headline was “Foul-mouthed blogger calls Pat Kenny a cunt live on air – nation outraged”. The Evening Herald said I was ‘worse than Tommy Tiernan’.

Then I woke up, smiling, content and heartily refreshed.

But all this morning I’ve been wondering, why don’t we have a proper opposite to ‘nightmare’?