Go in, hold your breath as long as possible, only breathe through your mouth, do your business as quickly as possible, come out, gasp for fresh air, exhchange looks with person who is next in the queue. Yours is a mixture of ‘oh fuck that was disgusting’ with a touch of ‘I feel sorry for you having to go in there’. There’s is a ‘I know it’s disgusting’ mixed with ‘Oh I really don’t want to go in there’.
Electric Picnic toilets. Except for one man.
“It’s easy” he said, as one person returned from an epic trip to find the least worst toilet to have a poo in.
“What’s that then?”
“Immodium in, Senecot out”.
“Eh?”
“A load of immodium on Friday and Saturday means you never have to sit down. Get home on Monday and Senecot it out”.
And thus a new verb was invented. ‘To Senecot’.
You could always compliment the Friday immodium with an homemade enema, thus emptying the warehouse so to speak, before hopping on the bus.
I’m surprised there isn’t actually an enema tent. I bet people would go.
If someone accuses him of being anally retentive over the weekend though he’s got no defence.
Lucky bastard. Had VIP tickets but couldn’t make it. Here’s a tip for next time.
Bring a padlock along. First thing on Friday find a clean one and pad lock it shut. That’s your own personal toilet for the weekend so if it smells it’ll be your own whiff.
Brown arts. No Guinness or brightly coloured cocktails consumed?
Beer all the way. No Guinness to be had. One of the VIP bars had Beamish, if I recall correctly.
Was it a visit to one of the toilets that prompted the terse “Urgh” tweet ?
2 questions twenty and I’ll leave you alone. (a) Did you see my favourite band of 2010, The National and (b) if yes, and it was an ice-skating competition, would you give their gig (i) 9 (ii) 9.5 or (iii) 9.9?
Part of it, maggot.
Itchy, no, didn’t see them. They were on last night and I headed yesterday afternoon.
I do quite like that album though
A phobia of those jacks has prevented me from ever attending a festival. I may Senecot my way to it next year, but.
Totally unrelated, but thought this’d give yiz a laugh… two articles in The Independent today:
1. Four in 10 adults have trouble with everyday maths (http://www.independent.ie/national-news/four-in-10-adults-have-trouble-with-everyday-maths-2326081.html)
2. More than 15,000 people have applied for just 500 jobs — almost 30 applicants per position — at Dublin Airport’s new terminal (http://www.independent.ie/national-news/15000-applicants-compete-for-500-new-jobs-at-airport-2326077.html)
Hmm… isn’t 15,000+ divided by 500 ‘MORE THAN’ 30 per position, not ‘almost’??
Or maybe, just maybe, I’m one of those 4 out of ten.
Egg. On. Face.
heh
Ah the fun you could have lacing peoples drink with senecot.
Adam, it’s not really as bad as America.
‘According to a new federal study just released, an estimated 32 million American adults remain functionally illiterate in 2009.’
Choco;ate laxative bars are great fun with the illiterate and dyslexic.
I love that line in Conversation 16 – “I live on coffee and flowers”.
one from their album The Boxer
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yZDl2xRK_r8&feature=related
“you know I dreamed about you, for 29 years, before I saw you”
and one from their 1st album
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XpNA2XB4PB8
Who’d you see and rate?
Saw a bit of Robyn, not bad at all but a bit too early in the afternoon to really get into.
DJ set from The Revenge was really good.
LCD Soundsystem – epic.
Leftfield, also really good but was quite stimulated by then.
Sunday morning – Dublin Gospel Choir were actually amazing.
The National were in town on Friday afternoon. Saw them hanging around near McDaid’s.
Any word of Massive Attack?
ps, Do folks not go in camper vans with their own on-board jaxes?
I’m sure some of them do.
Haven’t had any contact with the late-stayers so dunno how Massive Attack were.
jesus twenty. were you dropping a truckload of e’s?
Not so much a truck as a small van
i was wondering. that’s a fairly eh, narrow, is not the word. you know. it’s not exactly easy-listening-put-your-feet-up-ronan collins hour type list that you have there. all great sounds of course. i think I heard LCD were going to call it a day soon. HM – I hope you sidled up beside the dudes
So 30% of people can’t do basic maths? That’s terrible
True, Itchy. I tried Gil Scott Heron but he was way too mellow
I couldn’t get over the number of Americans I met who couldn’t tell ‘left’ from ‘right’.
They just did that indicating thing with their hands.
Still its not much better in the UK .. lady I went out with who had a geography BA and a History MA asked me who won World War II. She wasn’t being funny either. She didn’t know.
They didn’t do World War II on her course.
If you don’t know your left from your right then the worst that can happen is that you’ll be going around in cirles ad infinitum (responding to the cpatain always brings out the greek* in me for some fucking reason). The problem with having a maths deficiency is plain to see – Bertie Ahern, Charlie McCreevy, Brian Cowen, Brian Lenihan.
*yes I know it’s latin but it made me think of the time in Kos when on holiday with my mad mate Ivan. We spent 2 evenings talking and having dinner with two gorgeous dutch girls. On the second night, with very strong dutch accents, one of them said to us “You know we dykes in Holland? We are Holland Dykes” That was a fucking nuts holiday.
Watching alot of family guy these days. It explains to me my tangents.
Just listenened to High Violet. Again. it gets better every time.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HEE0OGJUE-4
Speaking of Brown.
I see that Blair was only using Dublin as a guinea pig to see how pissed off people are at him before going any further with his signings.
Ireland – Come try out your shit on us first before spending money doing it everywhere else.
http://www.independent.ie/breaking-news/national-news/blair-may-shelve-signing-after-demo-2326660.html
Yeah I heard that on the beeb radio this a.m. He’s such a fucking cunt
I’m listening to Brian “I’m a solitor, Jim, not an economist” Lenihan discussing the economy as a parable of the ship in a storm and he is bringing it in to port. Good fuck. God fucking help us. The fastnest springs to mind. Parables from the minister for finance. It’s getting like Hugo Chavez over here.
I’d rather a Hugo Chavez or an Evo Morales.
iMMODIUM IN – cAPT cON POSTS OUT…
Paracetamol slams you shut. Prune juice opens it up.
Everton are playing Manchester United this w/end. I am looking forward to that soundtrack.
Twenty – “Not so much a truck as a small van”
Do Mitsubishi do small vans now?
Gluaistain is slipping- I can see three lowercase letters in the above posts.
Itchy, one of the best first mornings on holiday was when I found at breakfast a distraught Dutch girl I’d been chatting with on the journey to the island the night before.
She was gutted that she was on a Greek island and the place she was staying looked out on a windmill.
‘A focking WINDMILL…’
Dessiegee
September 6th, 2010 @ 3:12 pm
Twenty – “Not so much a truck as a small van”
Do Mitsubishi do small vans now?
hahhaaha. classic
though those day did have a dark side.
http://www.independent.ie/national-news/son-says-father-murdered-man-over-theft-of-drugs-411784.html
Man 0 – Bull 1
http://www.independent.ie/breaking-news/world-news/man-gored-to-death-in-bull-run-2326989.html
HM – I’ve got as far as – a carpenter was killed by a bull during a celebration concerning the virgin mary. heh
Why why why do you need to have a shit at a festival? Can you not hold it?
I’d say the state of the jacks had a lot to do with the clientele, they are full of shite.
I cannot stand Electric Picnic. I wouldn’t mind if they stopped referring to it as a music festival and labelled it with something more appropriate, I’m thinking something along the lines of, “An Arty Farty Affair”. It is full of all these wannabe Music Guru shite bags. The revelation that Tubby Ryan was there made me wants to jab or gauge my own eyes out. Come on now, you know it is shite?! I was outta of there at 8pm on Saturday, saw what I wanted, finished off my shoulder of Jemie and ran like the wind. The thing that annoys me the most is the whole Aiken’s Eclectic Picnic V MCD’s Oxygen war. I know the line up this year for Oxygen was less that desirable but EP was far worse. Last year I went to both, in all honestly I cannot remember one good gig at Electric Picnic 2009, it was messy, full of relentless grey haired dicks’s who would have looked more at home wearing long leather coats and hovering around playgrounds. But at Oxygen the crowd are good crack, not the twisted trouble starters a lot of people perceive them to be, they are just there to enjoy themselves. We stayed in a nice hotel in Naas, watched Lilly Allen, Squeeze, Snow Patrol, Kinds of Leon, The Killers, Ocean Colour Scene, The Specials…. I have never ever seen a better live performance than the Pet Shop Boys at Oxygen last year. It was pissing rain, people were covered in mud but in a tent packed to the proverbial rafters they were amazing. My 16 year old nephew was blow away by them, that is what a music festival is. Not lets sit in a tent and talk about poxy well politics.
That’s the spirit Nonny! But. There is a big problem with everything in this line, except squeeze
- nice hotel in Naas, watched Lilly Allen, Squeeze, Snow Patrol, Kinds of Leon, The Killers, Ocean Colour Scene
Well, clearly the Electric Picnic isn’t just a music festival, nonny.
Plus, you know, you can do what you want. Nobody forces you to sit in a tent and talk about politics.
However, I would agree the line-up in general was a little underwhelming.
“Kinds of Leon”
…is that a tribute band?
…or something like Poxy Music?
Yeah…… It is advertised as a music festival. And don’t get my wrong I think Leviathan is excellent. I went to see Naomi Klein a couple of years ago (and off course your good self). I just think it is not really appropriate for a supposed music festival. I went to EP this year specifically to see a number of debates and talks and thought they were excellent. But I think you may agree they would have been far more enjoyable in a function room of a hotel perhaps or even don’t laugh, Trabolgan Holiday Village, sitting on a comfortable chair sipping a nice black coffee or Jameson and coke from a glass. The appeal and attention was lost sitting in a tent smelling like a mouldy wet sponge and sneaking swigs of whiskey from a coke bottle. I would be unfazed by the latter if I was pissed, listening to good music and building mud men with gionormous penis’s with my little mofo bro (Don’t worry he is 27), but trying to appreciate somebody’s opinion in that setting was extremely difficult. I mean you could see people wondering around thinking, what the fuck is this. I really thought the organisers did some participants a disservice. And the music isn’t great which was a shame as some performers would have made excellent support acts for more established bands.
Also Itchy, I was more trying to highlight that in terms of music Oxygen seemed to have a bit of everything for everyone. Squeeze were good but didn’t sing “labelled with love” which pissed me off enormously but Terry Hall made up for it when he took to the stage the next day.
Man 0 – Hay 1
http://www.irishtimes.com/newspaper/breaking/2010/0906/breaking20.html?via=mr
Farmer – “Hay! Look out!”
ELO Dude – “Don’t you mean “Hey?”
Farmer – “Fucking prog rock. Forget it”
Johnny Rotten won’t be at that removal HM.
i was just kidding Nonny, I hear ya.
0. Conan Drumm
September 6th, 2010 @ 4:28 pm
…or something like Poxy Music?
The Fall played too. We’d be there all day with that one…
It’s like the old Rolo ad gone bad.
Nonny, you’re weird.
If you went specifically to see some of the talks why are you slagging them off for having talks?
Had to do it for workies. I just thought it was a shite setting for having such talks. Had I have had to fork out more that 200 smakers to that I would have staged a protest. A music festival with political debate, it’s wrong and you know it is. I was so wet I had to strip to my underwear before getting into my car and I wasn’t drunk going for a nap, wasn’t getting laid, wasn’t getting changed to party on. No, I was getting into my car to get my boring notes together. It had all the trimmings of a good musical festival with shite music and political debate. It was wrong. It was scut munch. also, I appriciate you are not in a position to lament it.
I cna’t do basic maths. I think I have discalculia. Do with that what you will…
And now that type makes it even more ironic. Sigh.
TypO!! Runs away*
Nonny. Are You Roisin ingle? Because you sound like you could write her kind of nonsense.
She really does
Did I read Conor ‘pricewatch’ Pope right… it cost him c. €900 without paying for a ticket? And he paid about €200 of that to ‘rent a tent’? Someone pinch me, I thought we were in a recession.
I know a girl called Nonny and she’s cool. So this one is cool too. If it’s her. Or her sister. Or even if it’s not her and she has sisters.
Nonny.
Kind of rolls off the tongue.
Though I think this nonny is a he.
This is going nowhere.
Definitely not Roisin Ingle HM. If it was this place would be flooded with pictues of babies, bicycles, angels, fairies, ouija boards and all the other claptrap that goes with Roisin Ingle.
I’ve never heard of Conor Pope Conan but I hope to god he got some excellent grade a narcotics thrown in there for a grand. Jo; I’ve now got Alanis Morrisette in my head, thanks.
I was so wet I had to strip to my underwear before getting into my car …
pictures or it didn’t happen