Monthly Archives: May 2010
New headshop legislation announced
Looks like the end for Head Shops. Get caught with Head Shop products, spend up to 7 years in jail. Get caught supplying Head Shop products, in your Head Shop, face up to life in jail. In the meantime, continue … Continue reading
Through the barricades
The young boys would always remember where they were that day. To say it was historic would be to underplay its significance. It brought people together at last, families who had been divided, separated and isolated were now free to … Continue reading
This weekend
I forgot to pay the M50 rip off charge. Should have been €3 each way, it ended up costing me €12 in total. When they actually had to pay people to man the toll booths it cost €1.90 to use … Continue reading
Rewinding the internet
Sometimes it’s good to look back. I wonder what the Kersal Massive are up to these days.
Times change
Interesting to read about bishop Eamon Casey in the Irish Times today. As we reel from one church obscured sexual abuse scandal to another, it’s worth remembering the reaction in 1992 when it was revealed he’d fathered a child with … Continue reading
Semiticised statute
“If you could go back in time and kill one person to make the world a better place, who would it be?”, asked Dirty Dave in Ron’s last night. “Hitler”, said Stinking Pete. “He was as bad as bad can … Continue reading
Buzzzzzzzzzuuurrrrgghh
Stupid fly, cactus is not a landing pad. Straight through the heart. Click for big. [photopress:impaled.jpg,thumb,pp_image]
I like the way you work it (no flappity)
Sitting in Ron’s last night enjoying a couple of quiet pints and ignoring the UK election about which I couldn’t give a shit. A one eyed cunt, a cunt who won’t stop going on about his dead kid and some … Continue reading
I duck and I sway
There are three major lessons my father taught me: If somebody hits you, hit them back twice as hard Always make a good first impression (you can fool them for ages afterwards) When you shake hands with somebody, make sure … Continue reading
There are three major lessons my father taught me:
- If somebody hits you, hit them back twice as hard
- Always make a good first impression (you can fool them for ages afterwards)
- When you shake hands with somebody, make sure it’s a decent, strong handshake
In my lifetime I have shaken hands with two politicians. Once, when I was a young man, I met Seamus Brennan, the former Fianna Fail TD. He had the worst handshake ever. Limp, slightly moist, tips of fingers job. How somebody who shakes hands like that remained a politician for so many years is beyond me.
The other one was Pat Rabbitte and it wasn’t long after he had a right pop at some FF cunt in the Dail. I can’t remember who but it was just before an election and he called to my door and I shook his hand and told him I thought what he said was awesome. He had a proper handshake. Dry, strong and he did that thing where you squeeze a little harder to show your handshake is better but I squeezed back a bit more and then we both realised we were dealing with a man who knew how to shake hands and left it at that.
I look at this current government and I see a bunch of crap handshakers.
Brian Cowen – sweaty, pudgy and somewhat oily – like fingering a seal
John Gormley – manicured but fundamentally weak
Éamonn Ó Cuív – warty
Eamon Ryan - a flip floppy, damp squib of a handshake
Dermot Ahern – he’d do that thing where he tickles your palm with his middle finger
And the rest of them would be no better apart from Mary Coughlan who has the strength of ten heifers. You can imagine the sinews straining, the veins bulging on her neck and she made sure you were under no illusions that she was nothing short of a great man altogether.
We have a bunch of flaccid handshakers in charge of this country. It’s no wonder we’re so fucked. I would honestly, seriously, truly enjoy it if someone beat them all to death. Or even one of them.
Just one. Please.