“I wonder”, said Stinking Pete, “if doing a Japanese accent when talking to a black person is racist”.
“Don’t be stupid”, replied Dirty Dave. “It can’t be racist because it’s not about black people. You can only be racist about them. That’s the way I learned it anyway”.
“You idiot. Racism isn’t just against black people. It’s against anyone involved in another race that isn’t white. So me trying to sound like Junichi Kishawaki is probably racist”.
“But black people have seemed to capture the market in the whole racism thing, haven’t they?”
“They have, I suppose”.
“When you think about it that’s a bit racist of them”.
“I don’t think you can ever solve the problem of racism, you know. Not as long as there are other races”.
“What if you put something in the water that made everyone the same colour?”
“What colour?”
“Something neutral, I suppose”.
“Beige?”
“No, that’s racist because we’re beige-ish. Or slightly pinked. It’d have be a pale mauve. There are no mauve races at the moment”.
“What do you call someone who is against races in which competitors try to cross a finish line as quickly as possible?”
“Racerist?”
“No, that’s someone who doesn’t like bikes with dropped handlebars”.
“I saw someone the other day with the racer handlebars turned upwards”.
“Just another sign that we’re regressing to the 1980s. I bet he was wearing drainpipes too”.
“He sure was. Wham bar?”
“Don’t mind if I do”.
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Why did people turn their racer handlebars upside down? It always looked much more difficult to cycle like that. maybe they liked the challenge
It stopped your shopping bags falling off them?
Shopping bags full of cans of Steiger or Ace lager of course, not gay stuff like food.
Is it racist to say black people are atrocious drivers? I mean I know lots of Irish are too but come on. They’re not bad in an arsehole way, just kind of funny bad. You think there’s a kid in the back seat but it’s the driver lying back listening to Fela Kuti (who is excellent btw).
AND they like to drive on the right side of the road. Them upside down handle bars? Cables never reached.
..the Japanese venture capitalist who asked the Anglo Irish Bank portfolio manager why his investments are worth so much less now than they were two years ago. The manager coughed nervously, shuffled his feet and said:
‘Erm..fluctuations?’
‘Yeah? Well fluck you Europeans too!’
First fag of the day – sheer bliss.
What was his name Maggot?
benny
Is it just me or does Alan Dukes come across as condescending cunt?
I’ll have a Curly Wurly please by the way
“..the Japanese venture capitalist who asked the Anglo Irish Bank portfolio manager why his investments are worth so much less now than they were two years ago. The manager coughed nervously, shuffled his feet and said:
‘Erm..fluctuations?’
‘Yeah? Well fluck you Europeans too!’”
That’s reminds of the fella in the Rolls Royce…..
Pedestrian asks:
“How’s it you can afford a car like that?”
“I work for Cunard”
“I work fucking hard as well but I can’t afford one of them!”
What the beeb report has failed to say is that the current pope was in fact the Bishop of Bavaria when the sex abuse was going on. The report also fails to state that the abuse was happening in a Jesuit run fee-paying school attended by the kids of the great and the good. What the fuck is it with catholic priests sexually abusing kids? Was it policy?
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/8564074.stm
testing testing testing …….cunts
Can of Steiger, heh
What the fuck is it with catholic priests sexually abusing kids? Was it policy?
Some quotes itchy
the view of Mgr Alex Stenson, chancellor to three archbishops of Dublin (Ryan, McNamara, Connell) from 1981-1997, and who also features in the Murphy report.
In an interview last January with the Irish Catholic newspaper, he said: “What abusers did was wrong. It was dreadful, but was it always sinful? It was always wrong. Sinful? I am not so sure at times.
“If someone is a paedophile, it can have a bearing on their culpability. In church law, culpability may be reduced depending on the severity of the pathology.”
A big part of the problem – abusing children was seen as a lesser sin than having sexual relations with an adult.
The suspicion lingers in the Vatican that the crisis is all part of an anti-Catholic plot to undermine the Church — or as the Pope’s brother put it this week, to foster “a spirit of animosity” towards it.
The Church, Vatican officials maintain, is being singled out unfairly. Last year the Holy See stated that “in the last 50 years somewhere between 1.5 per cent and 5 per cent of the Catholic clergy has been involved in sexual abuse cases,” adding that the figure was comparable to that of other groups and denominations.
So – according to them as many as one in twenty of them was an abuser – but hey, that’s “just” the usual sort of percentage – which I doubt – and of course they don’t mention that these predators had a unique position of authority, trust and access to the vulnerable.
Fuckers are still playing games. Trying to keep the focus on the paedo priests – when there are TWO issues
1) the abuse
2) the massive conspiracy to pervert the course of justice.
It’s a bit like Watergate – that wasn’t just about the break-in, what nailed Nixon was the attempts to cover it up.
Time the United Nations and/or the European Court of Human Rights was involved in this.
“The Devil is ‘lodging in the Vatican’ and can be seen in the activities of paedophile priests, over-ambitious clerics and ‘cardinals who don’t believe in Jesus’.”
http://tinyurl.com/ydwc69a
Chickens are indeed coming home to roost divney.
Larry Flynt made love to a chicken
was it underage ? A pullet ?
He was a minor, not sure about the chicken.
an 85 year-old exorcist..he wouldn’t be much use if he got flung across a room.
jesus; such hocus-pokus nonsense from men who wear dresses. Mind you, I do have a penchant for wearing maxi dresses myself but only indoors.
That’s what I meant about chickens coming home to roost – the church is still in many ways medieval such as in it’s attitudes to sex and the role/place of women and this exorcism business is a fine example especially now that it has openly criticised the senior church. But they are screwed as they cannot turn round and say that things that were part of their dogma in the past are just bullshit. Something vagule similar was seen at Vatican 2 when, though it was supposed to be about moving forward, they specifically reaffirmed all the strong words (about protestantism) of the Council of Trent.
The old fucker is doing what old fucker priests always do- describing their own pathology in spiritual terms.
‘Sometimes he even mocks me’ (re the ‘devil’). That poor old fucker doesn’t even realise he’s created his own enemy in his head. Catholicism helpfully drew him a picture of what his ‘enemy’ looks like.
Every time that guy carries out an ‘exorcism’ (never recorded on any media, naturally) he’s battling his own madness.
And it looks the madness just keeps on winning.
Part of the conflict between religion and science Cap’n. Epilepsy “proved” them right until science showed it was a disease – and they fought tooth and nail against it. For a long time as far as they were concerned Illness was spiritual and their business – and it’s why they still like a foothold in the Medical world.
idle minds..still on topic
http://www.guardian.co.uk/sport/2010/mar/12/alan-shearer-small-talk-interview
Haha.. Shearer’s legendary sense of humour shining through once again..
He really is such a fucking cunt.
What crime against Arsenal did Shearer commit ?
Nothing to do with that. He has always been a cunt
thats hilarious. hes such a twat
I find that McDonalds Advert hard to forgive.
Ryan Turbridy, Boyzone and an IED.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X8lcAaCtbEs
I didn’t heart this as it happened but it appears the best bit is cut at the start of this recording. Does anybody know who did Nell McCafferty say was going to break the story? (Which Tom Dunne….dunno what station…has apologised for. Big fuck-up by Dunne/Producer/MD)
Kavanagh’s Bar gets a good write up in the Torygraph – could this be Ron’s place ?
Would just caution people to be very careful what they say re: the Newstalk/Nell McCafferty clip.
Itchy – dunno who she was referencing there.
I have my legal goggles on. Pull down my reference to the link to youtube if you reckon it could be a prob twenty. Newstalk…I will listen to that station now for deffo
maggot; I reckon Ron’s place is The Chinaman Bar near Aungier Street; in a timewarp
It’s a glandular problem
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bohK2Zyh1D8
oh yeah. This guy I know was doing a radio ad with a famous horse today and he told him to back …wtf..on wednesday…fred winter race…Sanctuary. As they said in The Sting – “To place”
this dude rocks
http://www.gavinsblog.com/2010/03/12/department-expense-database/
the other dude who resigned from the expenses forum last year stated recently that there was a culture of expense entitlemnet ingrained in the public service body as whole.
“NAMA chairman to get 70% pay increase”
http://www.rte.ie/news/2010/0312/nama.html
What would happen if the people of Ireland brought a class action suit against the Irish Catholic Church for gross indecency, paedophilia and child abuse? If half the population kicked in 100 euro each and got a top notch lawyer to work on contingency you could bankrupt the whole so called religious establishment in one stroke and in its place create a secular state.
Off subject I know but the lollygagging around the water cooler whining about everything is getting on my tits.
just back from bangkok yeah yeah need a pint of stout soon spankys bar what do you think itchy
I`ve never sinned, i`ve had difficulties buti t was never a sin. Anyway even if I did I`m making up for it now by doing voluntary work with handicapped children.i take them on outings.
Paulo.
Class actions are not possible under Irish law so that greater legal entities cannot be easily challenged by ordinary people. Pity.
Indeed HM – we Irish have no class.
My favourite things about Bangkok onthedry were -
- eating grub on the street from the street traders
- Shooting pool and drinking beer
- Nights spent in The Ministry of Sound
- SPANKYS
- Hanging out with my friends on Koh Chang.
Thailand is beautiful; it’s people are very generous and caring, pity about the fact that it’s government and cops are corrupt to the core.
Paulo – this country is dictated to by catholic politicians and the catholic church, it’s beginning to look like the fall of the roman empire in a monetary sense except ours was always a fantasy built on leverage. Garrett Fitzgerald has written some good stuff recently on the church/school/society power triangle. Burn them, see if they float or drown; that’s ewhat should happen to the catholic church – the future is voodoo.
have a nice day
http://www.irishtimes.com/newspaper/images/2008/1108/1225925567804_1.jpg
Whoa Itchy – is that pic safe for folks at work ?
going to thailand for the last 10 years just 1 night in bangkok is enought yes the people are great not mad about street food but yes the parish of phuket i just love
I used to get chicken take away from a place in Dublin called chickenland. We called it thigh-land because of the Asian staff.
i have to go fof a pint but the eggs chasers will be all over the pub
need a pint now just heard damien rice singing is it me or is he the worst cunt of a singer ever jesus that is fucking bad
Gruesome pic Itchy.
What are “eggs chasers” ?
egg chasers are rugby players Christy
damn, I was pretty sure that egg chasers were sperm.
I do have a mind like a sewer.
No comment – I want napoleon to live a long and happy life, not end up in my pot!
Is this mental reservation as well?
http://www.rte.ie/news/2010/0313/abuse1.html
the catholic church is one fucked up organisation
Is a Wham Bar some sort of euphemism for anything to do with George Michael’s hobby ?
had a few drinks in the Wham Bar and then onto Club Tropicana
That’s a very dodgy pub you go to JJ.
Fuse bars, yum