Crime doesn’t pay. Cheaters and thieves never prosper. My hoop.
If you have a neck like a jockey’s bollocks and no compunction about creating eight different kinds of truth then you’re all set. Bertie Ahern, we know what he’s done, what he’s gotten away with, what he’s failed to explain, what he did with his confirmation money and how he lives the life of Riley on the taxpayers dime.
Yet when you look to Tribunals to reign him in, to dish out a little sliver of justice, perhaps, they can’t do it. And if they can’t then you can only hope that the fates have it in for him. A little karma. Go on, not much. Just a bit. We’re not greedy. We’ll take what we can get. Just as long as it’s something. A dose of gout or a chauffeur who is a really bad driver. Anything.
Well, here’s the thing, karma, providing him with €10,000 winning lottery ticket is not quite what we had in mind. While the rest of us are waking up to news that we’re going to forced to pay into a pension scheme whether we like it or not (what are the taxes and PRSI we pay now for, btw?), Bertie, the slippery little cunt, has another €10,000 he doesn’t need in his back pocket.
So what’s the point of being nice and decent and hard working and honest when all you do is have your wallet inserted in your rectal tract, then routinely emptied by the snarling cock of government?
I hope that money brings him happiness. Or, to put it another way, I hope it brings him a slow and painful death, the horrible little cunt.
I want to see the trail of evidence… where’s the pictures of him buying the ticket… it’s suspiciously like the money he thinks he won on the horses.
Gambling, bookies and so on were always a way to come by usefully clean money.
Agree with Conan entirely, not a chance there isn’t something dodgy behind that. But if anyone dares ask him about it he’ll only start crying again.
And yes, being an outrageous cunt appears to be the only way in life.
Oh, and don’t forget Bertie’s karma comes with a driver, all at our expense.
Yep, it’s the way to go, all right.
But you have to have the neck. You can’t make a decision to be a greedy scheming twat. You’re built for it or you’re not.
I would like nothing more than to get out of this 9 – 5 lark and have mulled over various shady ideas but I realise I’m never going to be a cheat / crim / shyster / TD.
Still, I have something they haven’t and I don’t have a name for it. Heart? Soul? Joie de vivre?.. whatever. It’s worth a lot more than their stinky money.
Still, I’d love some money. 10 grand would be a nice start.
The little shite.
He’s such a tight, money-grabbing cunt I bet the thought won’t even cross his mind to donate it to charity.
I hope the tribunal call him out for what he is – a spoofing sleeveen fucker who is also responsible for bringing, Beverly Cooper Flynn back into the FF fold.
Was it dollars or sterling?
The Association of Barristers, Solicitors and Other Approved Criminals are demanding a ten year tribunal over it.
Bertie’s lawyers are expected to claim that an angry Polish man spat a shredded littery ticket at him at Dublin airport and Bertie picked it up because he doesn’t like litter and because it might have been a fiver.
SuperGrover – “cheat / crim / shyster / TD”? That’s a bit redundant as all of those phrases are now more-or-less synonymous.
A €10,000 win in THE SAME BAR as the infamous €16,500 dig-out? I smell a rat. A gombeen rat.
The rotten scumbag has a chance at a little redemption here: donate the lot to charity. Immediately. Then show us the receipt. If the tax-dodging little bollix keeps the cash, burn the bar to the ground. With him in it.
Agreed, all smells very fishy.
A the actress said to the bishop.
“So Mr. Ahern, will you be donating the money to charity?”
“Well, eh.. you know, I eh, gave de money in good faith for de club and, yano, I’m always buyin de aul tickets and all b.b.b.but I’ll be examinin de de de tax implications now dat I’m an artist n all ‘cos I wouldn’t like t’see the club paying dat out, you know yerself Crank.”
“Are you a cunt?”
“Der’s no need for that now. I brought peace to this great Island and, as a socialist, I ensured that..”
“Yes, but are you a cunt?”
“Boo hoo. Poor me. “Snivel snivel.”
Fade to black…..
And if you can’t afford to be a cunt, make your parishioners do it for you:
http://www.irishtimes.com/newspaper/breaking/2010/0302/breaking32.html
Ah, de criterisizers can all go n c c com mit suiside, yiz loolahs.
I heard on good authority that he swiped it from the arse of some guy on a Ryanair flight.
careful lads – he’ll be back. His career in politics is only just beginning.
Don’t know about that. Like Claude Makelee, his future is behind him.
off topic
A math tutor in Tralee said on the RTE radio this a.m. that his students were all good at memorising answers for the leaving cert but when asked to think for themselves they are as vacant as mary coughlan.
well he didn’t say exactly that but you get the gist. Interesting guy
That’s the problem with schooling you don’t really start learning until after you’ve left.
You watch el cuno – he’ll be el presidente yet.
He’ll have to get a sex change and adopt the name Mary. We have Marys O’Rourke, Harney and Coughlan in the queue ahead of him. Or we could get Robinson back. Or just leave McAleese there. All these options are amazingly more attractive than Bertie. Surely it would be too much – I might have to move to Newry!
When Willie O’Dea launches the military coup he’ll need a figurehead.
Mary Robinson wasn’t that bad surely ?
Check this out for a scary view of sexchange Bertie talking to Brendan Behan….hope link works!
http://irishtimes.com/newspaper/archive/2009/0928/pg016.html
shite, doesn’t work, it’s hard not being a pointy-head sometimes. Anyway, pg 16, Irish Times Sept 28th, 2009….
“a sliver of justice…”
Well he did break his leg a while back but even then he managed to use it to his advantage
He was unable to attend one of his many Tribunals
When you have people like C.J. Haughey calling him the most devious, the most cunning of them all you know you are in trouble.
The best lawyers in the land could’nt nail him.
it is impossible to get the cunt
Bertie Voodoo dolls for sale €20, instructions and pins included. Deluxe model (genuine Bertie hair) € 100. Trade enquiries welcome.
Did he ever get his tax clearance cert? Only there was some dispute lately whether he should have artists tax exemption from the book sales (heh) although it would be difficult to argue he should get that if he hasn’t even got a tax clearance certificate?
Isn’t the Moriarty Tribunal due to stand up and painfully try to condemn Ahern & Co while recommending that no further action be taken?
I can not believe how unpatriotic you are Twenty, writing such things about one of our greatest ever leaders.
Your respondents should remember that he brought us the Celtic Tiger! We have never had it so good. The evil media set out to discredit this poor man.
Yes, he had personal difficulties … and his friends had a whip round and indeed gave him a substantial sum … nothing that wouldn’t happen with any ordinary person. Oh bollocks, um well, he was a very friendly man.
We are living in riches thanks to Bertie, it’s just that you all don’t see it!
one of our greatest ever leaders.
Considering the competition I’d say that comes under “damned with faint praise”
Berties good mates with the guy who owns the bar where the money was won. Coincidentally, (and speaking from personal experience, and my own opinion) this guy is a gobshite arsehole cocksmoking unclefucker of the highest order. He’s lower than shit on your shoe. It’s a total armpit of a pub too.
The bastard will donate the money to a charity to try to score points in his plan to become lord mayor of dublin and eventually president.we have’nt heard the last of this money mad cunt yet.im starting a fund to hire a hit man to take the cunt out. all donations,cash only, should be forwarded to me @killthecunt.com.
Tomo Says:
March 2nd, 2010 at 6:17 pm
Berties good mates with the guy who owns the bar where the money was won. Coincidentally, (and speaking from personal experience, and my own opinion) this guy is a gobshite arsehole cocksmoking unclefucker of the highest order. He’s lower than shit on your shoe. It’s a total armpit of a pub too.
:)
Sure didn’t the Cunt use the same excuse as the crim John Gilligan used for how he got his money. The only difference is Ahearn didn’t go and do any porridge…both criminals.
Bertie is one of lifes Jammie Cunts!
If he fell over he’d fall into a barrel of fannys!
Mark Thompson; head of The BBC must be related to Bertie Ahern. Being a complete shit on Channel 4 News
The tribunal will hammer Ahern and then the cops will pursue him through CAB.
And then I woke up, fell down the stairs and broke my pyjamas.
‘one of our greatest ever leaders.’
Maggot said; “Considering the competition I’d say that comes under “damned with faint praise”
We shoot or exile our leaders. The ones in office in Ireland are relatives in many cases of a very small gene pool. Speaking politically, not literally I mean (well mostly anyway).
And as for shooting leaders … Collins was killed by Irishmen and the 1798 rebellion was put down by Irishmen.
‘Ireland has lost a great leader’ (Churchill, on hearing the news of Collins’ death.
We always kill a good idea
Nicely written and thanks for this interesting contribution. Do you write posts yourself or do you outsource?
You don’t like him very much, do you? :)