“Twenty”, said Dirty Dave this afternoon in Ron’s, “I’ve got to the age I am, an age I won’t disclose as I know the minute you go home you’ll tell the readers of your blog all about this conversation and I want to retain some air of mystery about me, and I have not realised my life’s main ambition”.
“That’s nothing to be ashamed of. Very few of us get to crossbreed people from Leitrim with gibbons to make a new kind of super-ape that’s rubbish at all Gaelic games”.
“No, not that life’s ambition. I meant that I never got to marry Tasmin Archer”.
“Tasmin Archer?!”
“Yeah. Tasmin Archer. Do you think she still pines for those sleeping satellites, Twenty? Do you?”
“I have to admit it’s been some years since I thought about Tasmin Archer at all, Dave”.
“I bet she does. I bet she still shoots for the stars for a taste of man’s greatest adventure”.
“Some euphemism that”.
“What has it got to do with the body of christ?”
“Jesus”.
“I’d have even settled for Tanita Tikaram, you know”.
“She always reminded me of Lloyd Cole with a vagina”.
“Oh. I might have passed on that one so”.
“Probably for the best, Dave. Probably for the best”.
Lloyd cole with a vagina. Now theres a thought
I’ve been in a Fermanagh Graveyard most of the day – sounds normal enough to me when you look at the people in that county.
She had an arse that just didn’t quit that Tasmin.
“Very few of us get to crossbreed people from Leitrim with gibbons to make a new kind of super-ape that’s rubbish at all Gaelic games”.
Someone already has. Roscommon.
Lloyd Cole with a vagina
Very prim and proper, no C-bomb. Seen the light ?
Tanita is looking pretty hot these days. And she has a blog.
ok. that starts my night off with thoughts that twenty was doing some nice mild acid this afternoon; I’m still grinning with data overload of songs, tanita – HM, you need to get out more than I need to get out..how the fuck do you know she has a blog?…I’m off to check it now – she was fucking very oddly cool/uncool – Lloyd data and Leitrim. Leitrim is cool. specifically Rooskey and the bar beside the ck….Reynolds..I think. good post. Tanita always reminds me of Boy George with a hat.
*gulp
Sorry Boy George; you’re dumped, I’ve found someone I’m sure about.
http://www.tanita-tikaram.com/photos/archives3.html
NTL is busted so no telly. Hence, googling of general shite. I’ve probably been in that pub in Rooskey. Is that the one with the Indian take away in it?
definitely no indian takeaway. It’s beside a big hotel on the main road. The barlady. I think I remember her saying that she studied chemistry and ended up owning the bar. And then there’s the local dude who cranks into this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GN2GE_SWRcY at 2 a.m. with no accompaniament*. 5 crazy summers spent down there one time.
I busted NTL from my parents gaff over xmas. It started with a simple query which in turn turned into a cheque and a cease and desist letter from me. They made Bertie Ahearn seem competent. They did ring back 2 days later to offer tea and cake but……
*never had to spell that before; could be wrong
I remember Tanita Tikaram’s brother, Ramon, played a gig in the Beal Bocht in Dublin one evening, as he busily rode on the coattails of his sister’s success.
A more out-of-tune fucker I have never heard in my life. I think being able to tune a guitar should be the minimum requirement before you inflict yourself on the great unwashed.
Tanita can’t sing in tune either, mind you. But at least she’s a ride.
Crank – reminds me of the Wonderful quote:
Wolfe Tone’s words on hearing of an Irish Harpists’ Festival to be held in Belfast in 1792, ‘ strum, strum and be hanged‘
( moved on to a different book )
odd place for the lass to have buttons on her pullover.
Ah, the Wolfe Tones. Used to sing of Irish freedom and equality whilst hiding a bass player and keyboard player behind a curtain at the back of the stage.
Play it like you mean it lads. Shower of cunts.
as for the other Wolfe Tone, maggot, I haven’t a clue. Another heroic Irish failure, methinks.
Like Jedward.
jonathan ross is a cunt and makes me want to kick the tv in.
so that’d be sade then SG?
Sade, whom I’m sadly very fond of, also wrote probably the stupidiest, most narcissistic lyric of all time about a woman’s suffering during famine in Somalia:
She cries to the heaven above
There is a stone in my heart
She lives in a world she didn’t choose
And it hurts like brand-new shoes
Hurts like brand-new shoes.
Do they know it’s Gucci indeed. Silly cow.
Sorry, the last bit was me, not Sade. Still, it might have been.
SG, you took the first image of Sadé off Google images. Did you not see the hot naked pic of her?
Go for it lads. Careful though, there’s boobs.
I always thought Tanita looked a bit like a girly Elvis. Check out the short-hair photos on Itchy’s link. It’s uncanny.
That specific picture has very special memories for me. I remember being in Greens bookshop as a teenager and seeing that pic in a book (about Live Aid) and nearly keeling over from the hormone rush.
Sooo hot.
Sure shes a Münster woman as well.
Tipperary no doubt. They’re wild down there.
lloyd Cole with a vagina?
Kind of like Kenny Rogers with Dolly Parton?
I have to say, that I could not agree with you in 100%, but it’s just my opinion, which could be wrong.