Monthly Archives: January 2010

Films I watched over Xmas

Where the wild things are – very annoying little child creates a magical world where creatures with giant heads build a fort and all sleep on top of each other until one of then becomes friends with owls which ruins … Continue reading

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New year’s resolutions 2010

A new year. A new decade. Time to turn over a new leaf. To make things which are improvable, improved. I’ve struggled long and hard to think of resolutions for this exciting new time. A decade in which space travel … Continue reading

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A new year. A new decade. Time to turn over a new leaf. To make things which are improvable, improved. I’ve struggled long and hard to think of resolutions for this exciting new time. A decade in which space travel will become commonplace after the mini-fusion reactor is invented by accident in 2014. I know this because time travel becomes the norm in 2019 and Dirty Dave popped back to tell me. Here’s hoping he hasn’t bollixed up the old space/time continuum by doing so.

Anyway, my resolutions:

1 – I will eat much less cabbage in 2010 than I did last year. As I ate none at all in 2009 I am unsure as yet how to go about this. Would inserting cabbage in one’s anus then pooing it out count as reverse cabbaging?

2 – I will stop being so understanding and positive about this government

3 – I will resist the temptation to get into online scraps with other blogs who deliberately make posts trying to drag up the same old argument again. I will resist. Mostly.

4 – I will buy at least one LP this year and not download them all. I’m feeling slightly guilty now despite years of spending far too much money on music. I will download it first to make sure I like it though.

5 – I will stop eating the skin off my fingers. It’s delicious, chewy and sometimes crunchy but that special pain you get when you tear off a bit which goes too deep is tiresome now.

6 – I will invent something cool. At the very least I will think of the invention while in my cups then bemoan the fact I never write any of my awesome drunk ideas down.

7 – Whenever John Waters or Kevin Myers are on the radio I will switch to another channel (ALTERNATIVE: I will buy a radio that can resist being thrown repeatedly at a wall).

8 – I will eat more soup.

I think 8 is plenty. Especially when I’m only likely to keep one or two of them. Or none, depends how lazy I feel.