Who is the biggest cunt in Ireland today?

Forget all those names that roll off the tongue so easily. Politicians, broadcasters, bishops, priests, bloggers and the rest. There are clearly only two choices.

1 – Vodafone ad bloke – the cunt who fills a garden with fake snow after calling up Joe Duffy.

vodafonecunt

2 – Meteor ad bloke – the carol singing, rabbling rousing, woolly bearded cunt.

meteorcunt

It’s one or the other, it has to be. Unless, somehow, O2 manage to bring out an ad with a cunt more annoying than either of these two. And bar it being Damien Rice doing an impression of David Gray singing Phil Collins while dressed up as Cristiano Ronaldo having sex with Didier Drogba and chewing gum really loudly, I seriously doubt that.

Vote now!

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95 Responses to Who is the biggest cunt in Ireland today?

  1. Lafsword says:

    How do you vote for both ?

    I’m going for the Vodafone cunt as they involved Ireland’s biggest cunt Joe Duffy in the ad, but it was very close..

  2. Twenty Major says:

    But Meteor bloke actually looks like a total cunt too

  3. Donna says:

    The Meteor guy is a total sex bomb!

  4. gimmeaminute says:

    I expressed my rage at the Vodafone cunt to Common Law and she was all ‘oh, you hate him because he’s doing something nice for his girlfriend?’ And I said ‘No, I hate him because he is a cunt.’ But I still felt bad about not filling the garden full of fake snow.

    And now I feel better.

  5. Frank the Tank says:

    Tough question, took me ages to decide but I have to go with the Vodafone guy too for the stupidest gayest present ever

  6. peadar says:

    Meteor cunt wins.

    The most annoying adds at the moment are the ones for “Your Local” brought to you by the “Pubs of Ireland”. They’re fucking terrible

  7. Frank the Tank says:

    snap gimmeaminute, my missus is the exact same, she’s all I love this ad, it’s so romantic while I’m shouting at the tv

  8. Twenty Major says:

    The Meteor guy is a total sex bomb!

    Hi, Metor guy!!!

    Gimme – and who would be expected to clean up the fake snow, eh? Especially when it turns into fake slush.

  9. Lafsword says:

    Fuck it I did vote for both of them.

    Gimme, just had that same conversation last night when I called him a cunt, then the meteor cunt came on and I got another dissapproving look.

  10. Holemaster says:

    Any arsehole who thinks he has to go to those lengths for his girlfriend to get her approval deserves to be horse-whipped.

  11. Woesinger says:

    For some reason every woman I’ve spoken to about the Vodaphone cunt thinks he’s being romantic as opposed to being a smug cuntish cunt.

    This says something profound about the female mind, I’m sure, but I’m too busy being driven spare by mobile phone cunts to say what it is.

  12. Sebo says:

    And that Donna is an awful cunt as well for fancying the vodafone guy. Donna you normally hae better taste in men! Oh ,hang on… no you don’t…

  13. rape-a-tron says:

    i cant understand how any fucker is voting for vodafone guy, i wouldnt know him if i walked past him in the street but beardy? if i past him in the street i’d know all about it. so would he.

    dont be james blunt, vote meteor cunt.

  14. morgor says:

    i actually haven’t seen the vodafone ad, but the meteor guy needs to be cunted in the bastard, doubletime.

  15. Donna says:

    Sebo, had you read my comment you’d realise I fancy the METEOR guy not the VODAFONE guy.

    You sound a little thick.

  16. Conan Drumm says:

    I’m not voting for either of those cunts, it’d be like voting for FF candidate A or FF candidate B. No votes for Cunts!!

  17. Sebo says:

    Sorry Donna, I didn’t realise you were that discriminating…

  18. SuperGrover says:

    The biggest cunt in Ireland has yet to make himself known and it is some bloke who sees the Vodafone ad and, even though everyone knows about it, tries to do the same for his girl because he saw it on the ad.

    A major flaw in that snow machine dealie is hoping that the mot will stay behind closed curtains for the entire duration of a diesel generator working away in the garden.

    Nonetheless, I voted for Meteor Man because of his smug beardy roundy head and his presumed fondness of the most annoying song ever…Galway Girl.

    I just know he sings that in pubs. The cunt.

  19. Lorcan the Lion says:

    The Meteor bloke is a bloke called Moe who was in the Gaiety school of acting

  20. Talula Does the Hula From Hawaii says:

    Donna is right the Meteor guy is hot although the ad is a bit crap.

  21. Kim Jong Il says:

    I don’t see an option to vote for David McSavage, or are we just going to assume that his cuntiness is scaled on a different, grander, cuntometer?

  22. I have an equal amount of cunt-calling for both.

  23. Hangar Queen says:

    The Biggest Cunt In Ireland category is a crowded field these days but these two really stand out.

    I think the Meteor cuntuoso edges it though. By a (carefully coiffed) hair. Do you think he’d die if we shaved it all off of him?

    I do hope so.

  24. noddy says:

    Vodaphone cunt is so smug. Needs a good cuntin in the bastard.
    Next Q which one of the girl carol singers would ye ride?

  25. Twenty Major says:

    For goodness sake, noddy, this is about staring at men.

  26. peadar says:

    They’re both cunts, but rapey you seem to be taking it a bit personal about the meteor cunt. Did he ride your ma? Or your girlfriend? Or, oh god no, don’t tell me he shagged your dog

  27. Yippee says:

    Yer man with the fake snow demonstrates exactly what drives women nuts, and I don’t mean in a good way.
    If my other half ever did anything so idiotic, I’d divorce him immediately, 12 kids or no 12 kids!
    It wouldn’t be worth the constant obligation to keep saying ” Aren’t you brilliant!” to him, as he congratulated himself for the next ten years, ” ‘Member that time…”
    I’d never hear the end of it, and I wouldn’t get a proper present, cos “snow” is all I’d get!
    No diamonds, just ice. Typical!

  28. Conan Drumm says:

    Twenty, can’t you just report that Vodafone cunt to the EPA or John Gormley or the local authority for pollution? I bet all that fake snow is now in a landfil dump taking thousands of years to decompose.

  29. peadar says:

    …..dump taking thousands of years to decompose.

    melt?

  30. jamesy says:

    I’d like to vote for both, please.
    Plus: Ben Dunne.
    Rory from Elephant Storage.
    Thanks.

  31. Big Ewan says:

    Anyone who says “what do you want for crimbo babes” in a D4 accent gets my vote. What kind of cunt says Crimbo.

  32. Damien says:

    Smug Meteor Cunt gets my vote!

    Four years and an Arts degree, and I bet he was a smug looking Cunt when he started it.

  33. Fatmammycat says:

    “Gimme – and who would be expected to clean up the fake snow, eh? Especially when it turns into fake slush.”
    Oh really?

  34. Barry says:

    WANKERS!

  35. Colm Doyle says:

    I only voted for the Vodafone chap, cause anyone who rings Joe Duffy is a cunt in my eyes.

  36. Holemaster says:

    Barry, will you tell Gluey we need his input here.

  37. DD says:

    Meteor bloke using christmas carols to bully people? What a riduculous hippy cunt.

    Vodaphone bloke is most likely just hen pecked.

    That 3 Bill bloke was an annoying cunt too.

    Best xmas ad on tele is the one for Guinness.

  38. Christy says:

    Meteor guy gets my vote. The unbearable smugness of being

  39. Twenty Major says:

    There is no such thing as best Christmas ad in the same way there is no such thing as the best Christmas song,

  40. rape-a-tron says:

    “Anyone who says “what do you want for crimbo babes” in a D4 accent gets my vote. What kind of cunt says Crimbo.”

    big ewan makes a solid point i have to say but he’s just some D4 cock, beardy thinks he’s a yank and can get away with yank corniness, irish people need to know they are not, nor can they ever be ferris beuller, zak morris or the bad ass from the breakfast club. leave americaness to the americans (apart from dude, dawg and awesome, we can use those)

    yippee i’ll bet your fella can’t wait to do his xmas shopping

  41. Holemaster says:

    I do like the Guinness Christmas ad though.

  42. DD says:

    Correction: The one xmas ad which I find non-irrating is the one for Guinness.

    Happy xmas, Twenty.

  43. Twenty Major says:

    The James’s Gate one?

  44. SuperGrover says:

    Ah, Jamesy, leave Rory out of this. He’s a nice chap.

  45. DD says:

    That’s the one.

  46. Thomas says:

    Meteor Cunt wins all the way, although there is no advert that annoys me more than “I want to poo at paul’s house!”

  47. Holemaster says:

    Yeah the James’s Gate ad. In the home of the black stuff… That’s a pretty good line has to be said.

    A little tear comes.

  48. razzer says:

    meteor cunt. i hate the smug head on the bollocks. i’d like to come up to him, just as hes being all smug, and shit in his hair.
    that’d teach him

  49. Maxi Cane says:

    Are we all forgetting about that Simon Delany cunt from the Tesco Mobile ads?

  50. Fill3rup says:

    Both of the cunts..

    Metoer Guy for making me fly into a rage everytime i see his poxy-jaysus head..
    and Vodafone cunt because he rang Joe Duffy..

  51. rubensni says:

    @Maxi Cane

    Simon Delaney isn’t half as bad because
    (a) he doesn’t sing carols just to piss people off
    (b) he doesn’t have a beard
    (c) he doesn’t “talk to Joe”, and
    (d) he doesn’t use the word crimbo

    QED

  52. Radge says:

    ‘Donna is right the Meteor guy is hot although the ad is a bit crap.’

    Yeah, and Hitler was a bit of a fucker.

    He got my vote.

    I asked the lads this very same either/or t’other day. Meteor cunt lost/won (depending on your viewpoint).

  53. rape-a-tron says:

    lost in life by winning AIDS hopefully

  54. Bill says:

    Now now everybody. I think you could all use some words of wisdom, about cunts, from the biggest genius on the planet today, Jinx Lennon.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uYUe8VxPDMY

    Life is too short for the hate people…

  55. Twenty Major says:

    Who the good cunting fuck is Jinx Lennon?

    It’s surely not the bloke in the video you linked to because you said ‘genius’, not ‘shouty bastard’.

  56. Andrew says:

    How the fuck is meteor guy so far ahead in the poll? You cunts are just beardist. has no-one heard the follow-up radio ad where the Vodafone guy is all “Roysh, I sorted this out for my borderline retarded girlfriend and then all the goys are onto me going ‘focking nice one’, cos their birds all want fake snow too.”
    they might as well just say “women are silly, greedy fucks who can’t do anything for themselves and are easily amused hahahahahaha!!!”

  57. maggot says:

    Nonny, when is her parole hearing?

  58. Ibanez says:

    Jinx lennon is shit. The beardy guy is shitter.

  59. SAm crea says:

    There is a brilliant new ad for carlsberg at the moment, I cant find it at the moment but here is one I did find. Produced no doubt by rapey and his mate..

  60. Holemaster says:

    Off topic but where the fuck is Billy Idol these days?

  61. maggot says:

    He fell from grace, which makes him a fallen idol ?

  62. Twenty Major says:

    I heard Brendan Grace might have to have his foot amputated. Diabetes sadly doesn’t attack the mouth.

  63. Lafsword says:

    “Nonetheless, I voted for Meteor Man because of his smug beardy roundy head and his presumed fondness of the most annoying song ever…Galway Girl.”

    A friend of mine thought the words were “her hair was black and her eyes were too” he called it the domestic violence song.

    After careful reflection I still think the vodafone guy is the completer of the two cunts, he phoned Joe Duffy.

    Lets face it the meteor ad is complete shit as we all know there are not that many people on meteor with coverage at the same time.

    Some cunt will ring Joe Duffy trying to get a snow machine just you watch or in his case listen.

  64. Pingback: Meteor Ad: Annoying Bearded Guy | Big Mental Disease

  65. Lafsword says:

    “Who the good cunting fuck is Jinx Lennon?”

    I’ll forgive whatever cunt throws him over that railing to his fucking death.

  66. maggot says:

    I don’t care how annoying Joe Duffy is, nobody could be worse than NI presenters.

  67. Twenty Major says:

    Julian on Friday might be a massive benny but he’s nowhere near as annoying as Joe Duffy

  68. maggot says:

    Downtown Radio, Big T. Cretin is being generous.

  69. papalamour says:

    Meanwhile over at the creativeireland forum a meaningful discussion from the professionals of Ireland on the topic of the vodafone ad continues, I don’t remember seeing the beardy one, but after only one night in a boutique (read couldn’t be arsed to put the mirrors up onto the wall) hotel in sandyford last week I saw it enough to make me want to install an ebola virus machine in his Christmas Sac…

    http://www.creativeireland.com/forums/showthread.php?p=290379

  70. john says:

    hatemail is class, i love ye entertaining spiteful ppl. they r paid actors…jus gud at acting lik douchebags

  71. ross says:

    I love the shear concentration of the word cunt in this post and in the earlier part of the comment thread. brilliant.

  72. itchybollix says:

    Vodaphone Guy is #1 cunt for being a pathetic example of earths organic heritage*

    Meteor Guy is #2 cunt for being a fake Channel 4 Bearded copycat funny guy who did some good shit a couple of years ago.

    *line stolen from the Bad Religion song, Modern Man.

    also; women and men; the one song I don’t like on In Rainbows was greeted with glee by all the women at the gig. Sometimes I feel like Butters.

    Meteor and Vodaphone Guy probably get 10 g’s for being cunts. But I have my cream.

    Jinx Lennon rocks. “you must forgive the cunts” and “Houses; houses everywhere”

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uYUe8VxPDMY

  73. Garicimo says:

    Tough one. While both undoubtedly cuntish the Vodafone nob jockey will suffer for many a year trying to top that fateful christmas. Which he rightly should. But that smug Meteor prick forces me to make the “aggro face” (tongue shoved between bottom lip and teeth and head quaking). As the more smackable of the two i feel beardy gets my vote.

    But it was close….

    Cunts!!!

  74. Ragin' says:

    Beardy Cunt is the most thundery of all thundering cunts… he has a face like a big watery cunt and he approaches confrontation with excessive aggression. Why can’t he just move down the street with his cunty guitar???? what rubs salt into my cunt-inflicted wound is that the missus, although she acknowledges he is a right cunt, still says she kinda fancies him. What a CUNT!!!! (Beardy, not herself)

  75. Feynmans Ghost says:

    Oh jesus Im basking in the rays of hate beamed in from the comments for this post

    Thanks twenty .. great christmas present

    But strangely neither seem to get me gander up … but then again I do watch “man bites dog” twice everyday

  76. rape-a-tron says:

    “hatemail is class, i love ye entertaining spiteful ppl. they r paid actors…jus gud at acting lik douchebags”

    you’re some fuckin goon, is it really that much easier to spell out “gud” rather than “good”? and i think i’ve heard douchebag used in defence of this cunt already, you crusading through the internet defending this probable child interferer?

  77. Fill3rup says:

    ..and how do you lik a douchebag?

  78. Jezzington says:

    For looking like Jack “The Cunt” Black, the Meteor cunt gets my vote. The other cunt has an air of “I read Indo group publications, therefore you should know I’m a cunt regardless” about him, which does not diminish his cuntishness, simply that he is the lesser of the two evils through lack of mental stabillity.

  79. Lanod says:

    If your wife goes on about Vodafone guy doing nice romantic shit, just tell her she is getting a bag of snow for Xmas.

  80. Rachel says:

    Meteor cunt by a cuntry mile.

  81. Andrew says:

    That snow dude should be scolded for giving women unrealistic expectations of what the men in their lives will do.This xmas she’ll want a trip to the moon and I’ll get her socks! Meteor guy is annoying too but snow dude takes the biscuit

  82. jamesblunt says:

    In fairness to the Meteor beardy fat cunt – the Tannenbaum choir cunt looks like a smug cunt and I can’t really blame the beardy cunt for contacting his cunty mates. But here’s where suspension of belief falls down – there is no way the beardy cunt could possibly have that many cunty mates.

  83. Torquemada says:

    @papalamour The very fact that people like you use the phrase “professionals of Ireland” and try to pass off a discussion about Eva Mendes and pineapples as the insightful banter of industry “professionals” is the reason that nobody has visitied creativeireland in about 5 years.

  84. RH123 says:

    Thank you so much for this thread.

    I have been going apeshit in the living room everytime those ads have come on for the last week.

    The wife thought I was overreacting, then I showed her this discussion thread and she realises that I am not alone in my rage.

    As for the vote – Jesus but it is a close one.

    Meteor is without a doubt the biggest bollix on the planet and I would pay to see his head flushed down a toilet.

    However Vodafone guy pips him for mentioning “Chrimbo” – anyone who uses that phrase is – by definition – a thundering bollix

    Keep up the good work lads – I have had a rough week and reading this thread is the nicest thing that has happened to me all day.

    Regards
    R

  85. Twenty Major says:

    Glad to have helped, R.

  86. Pat says:

    Meteor cunt is actually smugger but there’s a follow up radio ad where vodafone cunt’s bird’s mate all want snow as well. And the cunt goes onto say how all his bird’s mate’s fella’s (keeping up?)”i.e my friends” are annoyed with him. So the ad establishes that as an added extra measure of cuntyiness that smug vodafone cunt hangs around with a group of other smug cunts who all go out with eachother. The smug cunts. Cunts

  87. ciara says:

    i’m a grl n i hate the vodafone ad. if anyone did that for me i’d dump him. only a total nutjob would go to that much effort. it’s tom cruise creepy.

  88. war hammer says:

    their both cunts
    but id leave the burds in the ads arses like a blood oringe especillay the tannim baum chior cunt

  89. colin says:

    that meteor cunt is a piece of shit but that vodafone muppet is a complete cock.. fuck him and his ugly bird

  90. Simon hymen says:

    Vodafone are a total shower of cunts! Global cunts! Meteor are a small local shower of cunts so they deserve a break…

  91. bob says:

    there both cunts, just like everyone else in this shitty country. but the biggest cunts of all are the goverment, cutting my shitty 60.90 Euros to 47.10euro, i hope that cunt with the cancer dies!!!!!

  92. Lisa says:

    Meteor cunt just got a role in the tudors!

  93. Lisa says:

    Have to say – can’t wait!

  94. irishcunt says:

    I am the biggest cunt in Ireland because I set up a website dedicated to Irish Cunts. Bate that yiz cunts.

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