Soaraway

The Sun gives you the news you just can’t get anywhere else:

ONE in 20 British schoolkids thinks war-mongering dictator Adolf Hitler was a German football coach, a shock survey has revealed.

It’s not that shocking. Most football coaches are genocidal dictators bent on world domination and fascism.

Frankly, if you asked me to choose between having a pint with Hitler or Sam Allardyce I’d go with the Nazi who at least doesn’t look as if he suffers from body odour problems. That said, Hitler never shuts up about his favoured formation, 4-4-Jew.

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38 Responses to Soaraway

  1. maggot says:

    Oooh er missus, ending with a Tommy Tiernan ?

  2. Globetrotter says:

    Twenty

    Slightly off topic, but I think this guy is getting at you…

    http://www.irishtimes.com/newspaper/opinion/2009/1106/1224258183764.html

  3. Lorcan the Lion says:

    Funnily enough no comments allowed on that JOhn Waters article

  4. Sniffle says:

    but Hitler never managed Limerick..

  5. Twenty Major says:

    Also a very good point.

  6. Scaryduck says:

    Hitler only had one ball – which he took home with him after Rommel disallowed a goal in a Berchtesgarten kickabout because “I wasn’t ready”.

  7. Fill3rup says:

    He got a yellow card for that blatantly incendiary celebration against Poland in ’39…
    USa brought on as sub in ,42
    Went on to get a 2nd yellow and got sent off in 45..

  8. Woesinger says:

    Clearly not viewers of the History Channel.

  9. That being said, Allardyce does have that rabid look of a man who might blow his brains out in the bunker if his side loses.

  10. Fill3rup says:

    Clearly not viewers of the History Channel.

    You’re a History Channel viewer..

  11. Holemaster says:

    I can imagine how they structured the survey to get the result they wanted…

    Was Hitler:

    A. a Football Manager?
    B: an Evil mass murderer?
    C: a Celebrity Chef?

  12. el cuno says:

    You can’t fault his attack-mined tactics.

  13. wordhole says:

    The survey was taken with children aged 9-15, it’s hardly surprising that 5% of 9 year olds didn’t know who hitler was? and 10% didn’t know what SS stands for…

    And if you want to comment about john waters article try here:
    http://www.irishtimes.com/blogs/mechanicalturk/2009/11/05/why-cant-i-comment-on-john-waterss-article-about-how-horrible-comments-are

  14. TEN PARK DRIVE says:

    Ahh, the Germans. Fought two world wars. Came second, twice.

  15. Fill3rup says:

    They never had the Buying Power of The Allies

  16. maggot says:

    John Waters is an anagram of Cunt

  17. rob da bank says:

    Hitler has only got one ball
    The other’s on the garden wall
    His mother, The cock slut
    Bit it off when he was small

  18. Holemaster says:

    The Irish Times online polls look like they’re fixed. The percentages don’t change at all. I think they totally fix them themselves. Very iffy.

    Used to like it as a newspaper. It’s gone to shit though. Full of soft skinned organic journos writing about their jaunts around Dalkey on their funky bike with kiddy trailer with floppy haired kiddies named Caoimha and Sebastian.

    Cunts.

  19. gluaistean says:

    I AM NOT JOHN WATERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    I AM NOT JOHN WATERS!!!!!
    I AM NOT JOHN WATERS!!!!!
    I AM NOT JOHN WATERS!!!!!
    I AM NOT JOHN WATERS!!!!!
    I AM NOT JOHN WATERS!!!!!
    I AM NOT JOHN WATERS!!!!!
    I AM NOT JOHN WATERS!!!!!
    I AM NOT JOHN WATERS!!!!!
    I AM NOT JOHN WATERS!!!!!
    I AM NOT JOHN WATERS!!!!!
    I AM NOT JOHN WATERS!!!!!
    I AM NOT JOHN WATERS!!!!!
    I AM NOT JOHN WATERS!!!!!
    I AM NOT JOHN WATERS!!!!!
    I AM NOT JOHN WATERS!!!!!
    I AM NOT JOHN WATERS!!!!!
    I AM NOT JOHN WATERS!!!!!

  20. Holemaster says:

    I’d just like point something out, because I know you all noticed it. Due to the slender vowel rule in the Irish language, the name ‘Caoimha’ I mentioned above should in fact have an ‘e’ at the end not an ‘a’. Sorry about that. Won’t happen again.

  21. itchybollix says:

    John Waters and Kevin Myers walked into a bar.

    Everybody left.

  22. Holemaster – ye should be ashamed of yourself

  23. Tadgh says:

    The sun, what a rag. Either

    1. They made it up
    OR
    2. They asked 20 kids and one was a chancer or straight up retarded

  24. gluasitean says:

    What’s the latest on Dev being a traitor????

  25. sam crea says:

    wasn’t dev secretly dealing with hitler?

  26. Twenty Major says:

    Dev played outside right for Hitler XI

  27. maggot says:

    Came as a bit of a surprise to me that Dev was on the side of the angels, Denis Donaldson MkI

  28. gluaistean says:

    Its not widely known that Hitler had a half-nephew called Aurthur….
    And with Dev playing both sides of the field….

    And the Brit Aristocracy and particularly the MI5 spymasters thinking Adolph was the messiah…

    And would have known about Dev and his dastardly sell-out…

    Interesting that so many Irish were cannon fodder and that the Yanks were not able to be billeted in Ireland because we were ‘neutral’….

    ‘Cos if they had been billeted here, we would now be a totally united country WITH the nuke bases Truman so desperately wanted to control the Atlantic with….

    Makes one think….

    What price Dan Browne now, eh???

  29. DD says:

    Poor auld Dev, he could have chosen to run out the tunnel for so many nations: Ireland, USA, France, Cuba, Mexico, Germany among others. If only he was a tad more forthcoming about his lineage.

    His football career was also cut short by constant injury/illness, it was somthing to do with his pathetic constitution.

  30. Size ten says:

    Dev should have been sent off for that foul on Collins, I think it was an English refree that day?

  31. morgor says:

    Dev … cunt.

  32. maggot says:

    More or less cuntish than Bertie and modern FF ?

  33. glluasitean says:

    hitler was a gas man if you giave him his jew….

  34. Size ten says:

    On the front page of yesterday’s Times there is a picture of two Garda outside Dawson jewelers, one has a hand missing and he’s counting the fingers on the other one, tough men in a tough situation, in a tough Dublin.

  35. morgor says:

    More or less cuntish than Bertie and modern FF ?

    probably less. but only just.

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