My poo clock is all off.
Normally I’ve done at least one before midday. Today, so far, nothing.
This is worrying. Very worrying indeed.
My poo clock is all off.
Normally I’ve done at least one before midday. Today, so far, nothing.
This is worrying. Very worrying indeed.
Did you eat those pickled eggs at Rons ?
You have Poo-AIDS…
No and NOOOOO
Sorry, if nothing happens by tomorrow – you will be dead, and what will happen to this place ?
Don’t get me started.
We are trying to get Twenty started.
Think Ahern, Harney and Cowen !
Constantinople
You are in a poo dream …. you are not awake yet
You are blogging while dreaming and while dreaming you are dreaming about having missed a poo
theres a lot of recursion there .. youll have to toss and turn a few times to jump back into reality …. fuckit reality sucks …just stay dreaming
How about a Caesarean?
You haven’t pooed today? So you’re full of shit?
Nothing new there then.
have two cans of Bulmers Pear.
Increase your rhubarb intake.
Fabregas has just broken his leg in training.
You lucky bastard Twenty, you’re going to really fucking enjoy it when it comes. I’ve been holding one in the chamber all afternoon just so it’ll be all the nicer.
Jesus, I never post like this on other blogs.
You serious Divney?
I suspect Divney is trying to cause an uncooked poo to prematurely emerge.
How about a Caesarean?
Too much like self-harm.
Anyway, you’ll be all glad to know it happened and it was the classic non-wiper too.
A picture speaks a thousand words …. cmon T show us that curler
I thought that would shift it.
with its little tale peeping above the rim … waving a static wave …murmuring free at last ..free at last ..thank god almighty im free at last
Interview with the poo in question
Charlie bird : So you were in there long enough ..why my good man not on time this time
Poo : Yeeeeee twas the beans he had that didnt sit right with the boyz ya see …he never had the beans before …
charlie bird : so you were thinking of letting the beans go first in a fart of air
Poo : Yeah thats right ..but the arse he has the way it is this time ..we were a fraid we’d all fall out with the rip of the fart ..so we decided to stay in an join together
Charlie bird : I once got a full face of ann doyles fanny fart ….. fake a licious ..
Yay! Unto Twenty a Child is born – a nation celebrates!
I read somewhere that only gentlemen of a certain persuasion were capable of producing ‘non-wipers’.
I think it was in The Bible.
No mention of it in Ginsberg’s eulogy to his sphincter Git.
I can’t find Ginsberg in my Bible at all.
He must’ve be on one of the pages I wiped me arse with.
It’s diet and protein levels – carnivores do bullets and Veggies do sloppy, omnivores in between.
I was in Easons the other morning and had to go literally running out of the place to find a toilet.
The next day I went back to finish my browsing and the same thing happened..
It seems my Colon which associates reading with its being emptied went into overdrive in the book emporium.
I hope you hit the Gresham Sam. Fine toilets.
I always find that a strong double espresso and a couple of tasty fags tends to get things moving.
Maybe that’s just me. If that doesn’t work, try smoking a big fat joint. THC relaxes smooth muscles such as those in your colon and rectum, and so almost guarantees a satisfying horace.
Matt. A couple of tasty fags will get it moving the wrong way.
If yer still bunged.
Try coffee and 4 wheatabix.
Make sure a vacant trap is close by.
If it happens again – warm water with a squeeze of lemon, some Bran Flakes and a middling amount of crack cocaine. Beyond that, you’re on your own.
there’s some quality advice out there.
Fruit and a cup of coffee would be my advice but hey, from the sounds of things you’ve got on ok.
Well done. Another notch on the toilet seat.
Castor oil is hard to beat. Tastes great with Gin and strawberry crush.
So many experts on shit, all in the one place.
Yet somehow, I’m not the slightest bit surprised.
Will it be back to the normal schedule today or yet another afternoon delivery ?
4 poos in 2 hours this morning…..must remember to tip the takeaway driver more than 20cents…..
Charlie bird : I once got a full face of ann doyles fanny fart ….. fake a licious ..
molloy says harneys smell like chocolate eclairs after being picked up in a fish shop,mind u she needs to fart to give him a hint where it is
Fascinating
Do keep us updated theres a good chap
FUNNY THAT – I THOUGHT THIS CLOG WAS WHERE YOU LEFT YOUR DEPOSITS???…..
It’s hard to believe that so many people would be so facinated by shit!
Twenty could you create a special subscription only blog detailing your daily poos … you could provide pictures and wavs of the groan and the moan …please twenty …please either that or ill have to get my msn pal in india to do it for me .. but I fear the solids may be more liquids
Matt. A couple of tasty fags will get it moving the wrong way.
HM I laughed out loud at this even though nobody else commented…(not that there’s anything wrong with that)