“Look Dirty Dave”, I said in Ron’s last night, “you might think that Tánaiste Mary Coughlan is a ‘horny slut’ but I can assure you that is one place you do not want to go”.
“I’ll go where I want. And anyway, you can’t call me Dirty Dave anymore”
“Why not? That’s your name. I’ll wear it out if I so choose”.
“Well it just so happens that’s not my name any more”.
“Whaddyamean? Whaddyamean, Dave?”, said Stinking Pete.
“I’ve changed my name. By deed poll”.
“Why would you do something like that?”, I asked.
“I’m just tired of being called dirty all the time”.
“But you are dirty”.
“I fail to see how the two things are related”.
“So what have you changed your name to?”, asked Jimmy the Bollix.
“The first name is taken from one of my favourite recording artists – Mousse T. He’s a lyrical genius, which explains my interest in horniness!”
“Save me”, I said. “And your new surname?”
“My mother’s maiden name … Cox”.
“Mousse T Cox?”
“Correct”.
“Musty cocks?!”
“Oh fuck”, he said. “I wonder if I can get my money back”.
The biggest lie ever perpetrated by Fianna Fail supporters – Mary Coughlan = hot.
(It took me five attempts to type that. My fingers kept rebelling at the wrongness of it.)
Come on JC – check them teeth, raaar – http://www.irishpressreleases.ie/content/Tom%20Close,%20T%C3%A1naiste%20Mary%20Coughlan.3107.jpg
If he’d forgotten the Mousse T crap and gone with a simpsons character
Crusty Cox
She could eat an apple through a tennis racket..
Theres no way im puttin my cock in there unless shes wearing a gumshield
Fof Christ’s sake who is the Gyppo in the suit and tie? The defendant? If you’re gonna dress up like Lord Snooty at least get a shave and haircut. What a scruffy cunt. I hope he isn’t a prominant Irish man. Politician? I bet he’s wearing faded jeans and old trainers below the waist. The twat.
He is Tom Close,Managing director of Typetec.
Although im surprised,as the state of him there he looks more like the managing director of a bottle of meths.
I think it’s one of those weird subliminal post-colonial lingusitic synecdoche things… Coughlan / Cocklán.
p://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/groundhog-day-shadow-means-winter-to-continue-1539295.html
Twenty, see the above link. Are you moonlighting for the English Independent? A hill called Gobblers Knob? It has to be you.
Haha, no. Not me.
Is he much bothered by the flies, Dirty Dave? Is Stinking Pete? For a Scottish filthy person living in the Glasgow area, whether you attract bluebottles or greenbottles can be a life or death matter. I pray that your pals support teams nobody cares about. I do. I pray it.
Mary Couglan, the woman who said the Waterford Crystal workers were making the country look bad with their “sit in” protest. I’d say they were worried what that horse-faced cunt was saying when they were looking at loosing their jobs, and pensions after paying into them for decades!
I keep getting Mary Coughlan confused with that other Mary Coughlan, the singing beauty!
Maybe that’s what passes for good looking out in the wilds!!