I love the story of how they discovered a mobile phone in the prison cell of John Gilligan.
He had hidden it in a lump of blue-tack. Inspection time must have been very difficult at the Portlaoise maximum security wing.
Guard – “Just checking your cell John. Lift up them blankets, good man. There’s a lamp, a book, a chair, no flat screen TV, that’s good. You’ve no budgies in here, have ya? Didn’t think so. Some Page 3 girls on the wall, everything’s in order, wait, what’s that?”
Gilligan – “Nothing, that’s just my giant lump of blue-tack”.
Guard – “Grand, carry on so”.
*an hour later*
Guard – “Wait a minute…”
I actually thought about this when I woke up to the news this morning. I reckon it was one of those very slim phones and he had in a cardboard blue tac wallet type pack.
Blue tac is bad for the environment.
Little fish get stuck to each other in the ocean. So one little fish has to go wherever the other slight bigger little fish wants to go.
Wouldn’t it be easier, cheaper, and more intelligent all round to block mobile signals in a prison?
But that’s just me. Going for the simple unthought out solution again. I’m a right cunt.
I mean where does it all end? For all we know Garda Bollix O Riley may have foiled an attempted break-out.
I bet your man Gilligan was eating loads of concentrated chocolate and deliberately monking on his prison issue bed-sheet. When it got flat stiff from all the months of monk sprayed on it Gilligan was going to lie on it with his arms spread wide and put a big lump of blu-tac on each corner so that when I visitor walked out with the thing under his arm Garda Bollix woudl assume it was only an unwanted poster.
Clever bastards these drug dealers.
They should tap his bloody phone instead of taking it off him. Run a wire on it, int that right Twenty. Get Lester on the case. Sheeeeee-it.
I reckon he was eating the stuff to try and get bluetooth.
Also, I have Revels
Bet you the next one is orange
Nope, coffee
“block mobile signals”
They did this at the Savoy Cinema (with the best intentions) a few years back and it was deemed illegal.
be a bitch if he ran out of credit, although he probably has a laptop hidden in parrot or something….
Run a wire on it, int that right Twenty.
True dat.
Totally off-topic here..
i seem to remember some discussion about Dave McSavage being a cunt some time back. This lad on boards.ie is a legend. The ball is well and truly rolling…
Humberklog
Good God let it be McSavage.
I’ve taken to abusing him. It started a few month back when I saw him on the street arguing on his phone and decided to stand really close to him and start taking his picture. He had coarse words with me but I didn’t respond. Just kept clicking away. Later I made a montage out of the photos. Within a few month I’d freeked him out by doing this whenever I saw him and had camera on hand. It came to the boil a few weeks back when he spotted me and started giving it big. I smiled benignly at him and suantered around the corner where I met and paid 4 junkies (5euro a pop)to disrupt his show as I stood behind them…laughing and pointing.
Best 20squids I’ve spent in a long time.
And the best has yet to come. I’ve a cracker up my sleeve.
Link here
http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2055346820
hehe SG, that’s a good story ;)
Conan Drumm says:
“block mobile signals”
‘They did this at the Savoy Cinema (with the best intentions) a few years back and it was deemed illegal.’
I know such machinery is banned in the UK because it stops the Secret Squirrel Club from listening in to the War on Mild Nervousness.
Libraries and theatres are going mad for the little box but of course as MI6 point out it would interfere with their illegal and unwarranted snooping.
I hope ‘M’ dies of Aids related cancer. Of the face.
Ha, I love it. I wouldn’t have the balls to do that.
I did play a great trick on a right cunt once though. One Christmas my flat mate and I rented out the flat to a couple who were friends of my flat mate’s brother. They were in Ireland for Christmas.
They ran up a huge phone bill and didn’t clean the place after and then just fucked off.
I saw them in Bruxelles about a year later but they didn’t notice me. I was there with a friend of mine and his girlfriend. I told them the story. So we devised a plan. The guy had worked in Baghdad (pre 91) while his girlfriend was working in Switzerland. I even knew the name of the hotel where all the westerners used to go drinking and scoring western nurses. I knew loads about him.
So my friend’s girlfriend went over and pretended to know him and starting mentioning how they met in the Palastine bar in Baghdad and being all suggestive. His girlfriend threw her drink in his face and stormed off.
Justice.
I heard he kept the phone in his blue tack and stuck it up his arse for added security. Apparently the ring tone he used was the sound of a tin cup being dragged across prison bars, the cunning fucker.
Apparently the ring tone he used was the sound of a tin cup being dragged across prison bars, the cunning fucker
His last ring tone was the Shower Rapescene from that movie American Me..fooled them for ages too.
I don’t mind testing the chocolate/sperm ratio for you lot but I’m damned if I’m going to try wedging a Nokia covered in blu-tac up my boyne valley just to see if its possible.
Did anyone catch what make and model of phone your man was busted with?
I hope it was a bakelite 1950′s London telephone.
I got tired of checking this for new posts so I’ve done one.