Sarkozy

So I said to Carla, it might only be this big but itll do wonders for your profile

“So I said to Carla, it might only be this big but it’ll do wonders for your profile”.

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115 Responses to Sarkozy

  1. Tinman18 says:

    Zeze Ireesh….I case ziss much about zere sheeety referendoom…

  2. Conan Drumm says:

    “The majority voting against the Treaty in Ireland was about this big. Therefore they must vote again.”

  3. Puerile Pish says:

    His wife is hot, and from her interview at the weekend seems quite an accomplished and pleasant person. So you can all fuck off.

  4. Twenty Major says:

    Why would anyone give a fuck about the wife of the President of France?

  5. Puerile Pish says:

    So I says to Cowen, “Bertie’s cock was this size but he had balls of Brass, what do you come with?”

  6. John says:

    His wife may be hot, but he is a cunt.

  7. maggot says:

    The bosom discussion on the previous thread is winning hands down.

  8. Hooronahonda says:

    I was going to suggest him as one of the many who should not be seen naked. Now his missus…!

  9. Hooronahonda says:

    Sarkozy:
    “zut alors et sacre bleu, Le plume de ma tante est dans le negligee de mon pere, mon brave!”
    Translation:
    “You’re this far from a spanking, my son!”

  10. Ibanez says:

    i squeeeeesh your head

  11. Fillerup says:

    He’s a right wing fuckhead,but he was a safe Tony Blair stlye right winger that lost Le Penn all his support.. Just cause his wife is good milf material doesnt take away for the fact that he’s a cunt..

  12. Tinman18 says:

    Mon Dieu, Le Teeenman18 is coming to La Belle Frawnce tomorrow (true) and we are ziss close to agreeing a wife-swapping deal (not quite as true).

  13. Hooronahonda says:

    I sought you said yuur dawg does no bite, his teeth were zis furking big!

  14. You are dead you cunt!!! I am not shagging a garlic muching,cheese eating surrender monkey, and if you touch that bint I will cut yer nads off.

  15. Aww fuck!! gravatars are a bit of a giveaway, I am almost as stupid as Lying Eyes bint.

  16. Jay says:

    She is trying to set herself up as the new Jackie Onassis. Apparently she told a friend a few years ago that her ideal partner would be someone who had nuclear power. Et voila…

  17. Tinman18 says:

    We’re only doing this for EU relations, Sarkozy’s getting the better half of the deal.

    (Don’t think Mrs Tin reads this, but 2 weeks is a long time to spend in the maison de chien in France.)

  18. Hooronahonda says:

    “Zese transparent suppositories are the dogs nadgers mes amis!”

  19. Tinman18 says:

    All of us would like nuclear-powered partners, they’d go like a train.

  20. Jo says:

    But your bits would glow for weeks, Tinman.

    PP, I’ve met Mrs Tinman, she’s got way more class than that!

  21. Hooronahonda says:

    “Merde! I dropped my escargot again! I must hev ze fooking palsy, non?”

  22. Hooronahonda says:

    “Le docteur sez zey should be no bigger zan zis and ze cream should ease ze burning sensation if applied regularly. Would you slap it on pour moi, mon petit filous, zey are hard to reach?”

  23. Tinman18 says:

    “PP, I’ve met Mrs Tinman, she’s got way more class than that!”

    She has indeed, Jo, but that’s only coz I’ve never got off with Carla Bruni before.

  24. Pingback: Jazz Biscuit: » It’s a jazz shaped interweb

  25. SAm Crea says:

    never listen to an album with a secret track at the end of the last track, at a very high volume, unless you want to have the absolute shit scared out of yourself when it kicks in after 1o mins of silence…

  26. Jo says:

    I think we’ve all done that Sam. They do it on purpose, to keep us in a state of fear and heightened consumerism.

  27. SAm Crea says:

    god damn I hate to plug anything by the company that is responsible for itunes, but safari (apples browser) makes this site look prettier and loads faster than firefox..

  28. maggot says:

    his wife is good milf material

    The lovely Carla isn’t a mothe, so you’ll have to relegate her to WILF – but take heart Filleru – according to Wikipedia – see link – she is quoted in Time Magazine

    I’m monogamous from time to time, but I prefer polygamy and polyandry

  29. Fillerup says:

    ah yes i-tunes, “Yes i have 40gb of music in My Music folder but i would like to make a copy of all of it just to use your confusing app”
    Thanks Mr Jobs u cunt..

  30. Fillerup says:

    Well i did say Milf material ..
    But i cant see her wanting to mess up her figure to have a mewling cabbage…

  31. Twenty Major says:

    ah yes i-tunes, “Yes i have 40gb of music in My Music folder but i would like to make a copy of all of it just to use your confusing app”.

    You don’t need to copy it.

  32. Fillerup says:

    Well i know that now..but along time ago when i installed it first,it copied everything automatically… then i fixed the problem by uninstalling it and never touching it again..

  33. Hooronahonda says:

    Polyandry! Fucking Walt Disney ruined a good book there.

  34. SAm Crea says:

    94.99 gigs, i bought it all, I swear..

  35. Peurile Pish says:

    Good Holiday Tinman, but how do you stop yourself from setting off the alarms at the airport? Or do they just think you are a cheap Irish Terminator and shuffle you through with embarrassed smiles?

    Or could it be…you are actually made of plastic not Tin (cheap chinese import)

  36. Fillerup says:

    He he…yes..me too and i’ve actually got about 200gb’s now… for Djin’

  37. Peurile Pish says:

    I have about four feet of vinyl and miles of tape. How does this equate to your modern/futuristic Gb thingies

  38. SAm Crea says:

    sure fillerup, all you need is brown eyed girl, and the chicken song, and your sorted for that biz, no??

  39. SAm Crea says:

    or brown girl in the ring, fuck,,

  40. Hooronahonda says:

    Did not the enchanting Nicholas Sarkozy get the Croix de Grrrrr for slapping some journo not long ago or was it somebody else?

  41. Fillerup says:

    Well i only went Giggidybites there recently.i’ve a few thousand records but they are a cunt to lug around all the time,so sometimes i just bring the laptop..

    Samcrea:sorted although i still havent figured out how to seamlessly mix Brown Eyed girl into minimal techno…

  42. RedLeeroy says:

    Around the bargaining table, Sarkozy only deals in MP3′s

  43. Fillerup says:

    I heard it was WAV files cause he only deals in quality..

  44. maggot says:

    How can I get an avatar/gravatar ?

  45. Jo says:

    no, maggot, you’re not allowed one. Don’t tell him, monkeyballs.

  46. maggot says:

    You are such a meanie J(-L)o!

  47. Dessiegee says:

    http://en.gravatar.com/

    Sorry Jo – I’m just checking to see if Maggot actally reads my comments

  48. Dessiegee says:

    gravatar.com – Register, takes about 15 minutes

  49. maggot says:

    Although having just read yesterday’s blog on Infantasia ( thanks for sharing ) I can understand why!

  50. maggot says:

    Thanks Dessiegee!

  51. Dessiegee says:

    Ahaaaaaa, Maggot, so you do read my comments –

    Sorry Jo – could’nt miss the opportunity to check if Maggot read my comments or not

  52. Jo says:

    ah, you fucker dessiegee, I should never have spoken in your defense.

    Now I’ll have to look at a maggot every day.

    Though I suppose it will keep me offline a bit, tht has to be a positive.

    And maggot, blah blah. The P in PMT stands for PRE. You get irritable before the period, not after. It’s all about the sharing though – what did you think the rest of it was?

  53. maggot says:

    Hell Jo – as my grandson, maggotIII, is trying to stand, I was touched and amused, but I hope the stahe of your menstral cycle isn’t going to be a big part of your blog!

  54. maggot says:

    This keyboard is driving me crazy

  55. Jo says:

    Yep, maggot, I plan to chart it, with daily updates as to the consistency of my goo.

  56. maggot says:

    As long as there are no pictures Jo.
    That would be too gross – though I’m sure there are other regulars here who would be keen.

  57. Tinman18 says:

    “Good Holiday Tinman, but how do you stop yourself from setting off the alarms at the airport?”

    I get to go through a special gate, PP, so I skip the queue, which is great, but then I get felt down (or possibly up) each time, which is not nearly as much fun as it sounds.

  58. Tinman18 says:

    Maggot’s right, Jo, you’re only allowed an Avatar for three weeks a month.

  59. Anto says:

    Tinman

    Enjoy your vacance in la belle france and remember to bring your speedos if you are going to a public pool as if you try to wear long shorts they’ll throw you out cos they think you might have VD…

    Leave some wine for me as I’ll be travelling for three glorious weeks in the sun with plenty of nice wine….

  60. maggot says:

    French toilets leave a lot to be desired!
    I’d poo in tesco bags if I was you Tinman.

  61. Jo says:

    heh, good idea Tinman. I’m off to find pictures of clots, and start an avatar war with maggot. Who is filling me with the urge to do loads and loads of period posts…

  62. Dessiegee says:

    Jo – unbelievably, you’ve managed to gross me out.

    That’s it I’m off home to throw the dinner in the bin.

  63. Anto says:

    Why are these posts showing time an hour earlier? Between that and post number 1 not being post number 1 this new site of Twenty’s is bad enough to piss off any pedant.

  64. maggot says:

    I’m listening to a Cajun track by Lawrence Walker called “Tits Yeux Noires” – beat that Jo!

  65. Tinman18 says:

    Thanks Anto, but it was me in speedos that got Sarkozy to make that gesture in the first place.

  66. Jo says:

    Black Eyes Tits? What?

    I grossed dessiegee out? Hurrah! I have so much more where that came from. My god, a whole secret arsenal I never knew I had…

  67. Twenty Major says:

    Weird – some kind of time change thing going on.

  68. Twenty Major says:

    Oooh, it’s like a whole hour just went into the ether.

  69. maggot says:

    It’s what the song is called called Jo.

    As for grossing out, “bring it on”!

    Just spoke to sister maggot – she’s coming round to thinking that Twenty may be a lady. Would explain a lot – especially his reluctance to talk prostate with the lads!

  70. maggot says:

    Who’s a clever Twenty then!

    Which disproves that he could be a lady blogger.

  71. Twenty Major says:

    Sister Maggot? Is that some kind of nun?

  72. Monkey Balls says:

    Sarkozy; “Oui, je connais maggot. Comme une bete, mais plus petite.”

  73. Jo says:

    I undestand it’s a song title maggot, I just just don’t get it.

    Sister Maggot sounds like a scary nun alright.

  74. Fill3rup says:

    Monkeyballs,you are a cunning linguist!!

  75. Jo says:

    Jasper! Yup, that’s a paddlin’!

  76. Fill3rup says:

    “Paddlin’ a boat? You bet thats ‘s apaddlin’!”

  77. Jo says:

    No, no – paddlin your own canoe – you bet that’s a paddlin!

  78. Fill3rup says:

    just shot up some gear, so me memory aint the best….

  79. Jo says:

    Well, that’s definitely a paddlin’.

  80. noddy says:

    to do loads and loads of period posts…

    As in period drama Jo?

    Like setting your blog in gay Paree of the 1890′s where you do a job on Sarkos granda?

    Or am getting the wrong end of the stick?

  81. Pingback: Sarko makes Twenty Major laugh! | Estelle et Rémy | On Eire

  82. Jo says:

    wow! French links!

    Eh, yeah, wrong end of the stick noddy, funny :)

  83. Fill3rup says:

    “Wrong end of the stick?,Thats not a paddlin’”

  84. maggot says:

    My sister is not a nun – though she told me a filthy joke about the seven dwarves and a nun.

  85. Sister maggot says:

    ok maggot you have gone too far – you will feature strongly in my ‘childhoodhell autobiography’once I finish making it up the joke was about a penguin anyway

  86. SuperGrover says:

    Happy New Year everybody!!

  87. maggot says:

    Heh sister – I reckon we know too much about each other to pose any threat!

  88. Twenty Major says:

    Is that really maggot sister?

  89. maggot says:

    It is indeed the sister Twenty.

  90. maggot says:

    Brother and sister posting, Possibly a first for the blog ?

  91. Holemaster says:

    Damn I missed the sea area forecast tonight, it’s like a lullaby. Forecast for all coasts and the Irish Sea from Midnight to 6am. There is a deepening depression 200 miles west of Mizen Head. Malin Head to Carnsore point, 965 milibars, rising slowly. Report from Buoy M5, nine miles, visibility, fair. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

  92. SuperGrover says:

    Tyne, Dogger, Fisher…

  93. Holemaster says:

    I think of the ships out there and the trawlers bobbing up and down hearing the familiar soft voice that knows they’re there. There should a forecast for pub goers so you now when is the best window for getting out and then getting home later without getting soaked.

    I think I was in Ron’s tonight.

  94. Holemaster says:

    Just a quick on topic before I hit the leaba, I think Segolene Royale is a much hotter chick than Carla Bruni. She’s got real sex appeal.

    Bed time prayers, God bless SG, Maggot, Jo, Twenty and all the starving babies in Africa. Oh and Scarlett Johanssen

  95. SAm Crea says:

    and there is always, always a small craft warning in place…

  96. maggot says:

    Oiche mhaith duit Holemaster!

  97. Jo says:

    You little crowd of sweeties. It’s like Walton Mountain in here.

  98. Fill3rup says:

    G’night Mary Ellen….

  99. maggot says:

    Be nice to me or I’ll set my big sister on you Jo LOL

  100. Monkey Balls says:

    LOL maggot? L-O fuckin’ L?
    You should be ROTFFL IMHO.
    L8R

  101. maggot says:

    OK, OK, it was a mistake MB. Slipped out.

  102. Anto says:

    Welcome Maggot’s sister to the mad world of Twenty. Now your sibling can, now and again, upset some people, so dont’ get upset if someone calls him a **** or a bas****. Both are widely used as terms of endearment on this site.

  103. Anto says:

    Well done twenty on fixing the clock.

  104. kev 2 says:

    this is the size of my wifes nipple erections as Ah am to meeserable to turn up the central heating..

  105. fatcocksacker says:

    hi dessie,how was your holiday in myconos,
    i heard you made happy many guys in the capital.
    kisses your stallionxxxxxxxxx

  106. MMN says:

    Is it acceptable to remark on how Carla Bruni’s clit looks like a knotted rope? Her swim suit shots are hideous around the crotch.

  107. Sister maggot says:

    Thanks Anto,I use those terms of endearment about him too too only they are more like factual descriptions unless **** means **** obviously, Maggot doesn’t qualify

  108. Sister maggot says:

    strictly speaking, only only one ‘too’ was necessary

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