Fuck you, David Gray
Posted on | July 4, 2008 | 314 Comments
Did you read this?
Basically David Gray is unhappy because one of his songs, Babylon, is being used to torture inmates at Guantanamo Bay. They get played the same music over and over and over again to break their tiny little minds and ‘Babylon’ is one of those songs. Gray says:
That is nothing but torture. It doesn’t matter what the music is – it could be Tchaikovsky’s finest or it could be Barney the Dinosaur. It really doesn’t matter, it’s going to drive you completely nuts.
Well, firstly fuck you right up your head-wobbling, fake-Welsh hole, you unspeakable, acoustic cunt. It does matter what the song is. There are songs I could listen to over and over and over again, and often have, without considering it torture.
Secondly, please tell me the fucking difference between the guards at Guantanamo Bay playing your song repeatedly and every fucking radio station in Ireland playing it repeatedly. You couldn’t change station without hearing your whiny voice bleating about how you’re not going anywhere on Friday night. It’s not my fault you don’t have any fucking friends, you complete and utter cunt. And this year’s love had better last, had it? Have you thought about killing yourself and then having yourself mummified because that would be a good way of making it last before the girl in question realised you were a drippy, reedy voiced wankhammer.
Do we get any sympathy? No, it’s only for the people who get the nice weather out in that corner of Cuba while we here in Ireland get nothing despite having been subjected to it for far longer and with much more rain. I am fucking outraged, let me tell you.
Got to hand it to the guards at Guantanamo though. They know how to fuck with a captive’s head. I bet after David Gray they lashed on a Damien Rice or two just to make sure they’d scream and beg for mercy and admit to carrying out any atrocity they were told to.
“9-11. Yes, it was me. I was flying all the planes. Just turn the music off”.
Americans might not be very good at this war thing but they’re fucking top class at the torture.
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314 Responses to “Fuck you, David Gray”
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July 4th, 2008 @ 12:13 am
He makes me spill the beans anyway. At least he has a career in the intelligence services after music.
July 4th, 2008 @ 12:22 am
soundtrack to many a divorce I’d say……wobbly head cunty cunt……still if mr gray doesn’t have them spill their beans then they should just pop on some coldplay……I’d admit to anything to get that shite off…..music for men who cry when the masturbate……
July 4th, 2008 @ 12:50 am
My god, could this be perfecter?
Are you sure you’re not writing the news, Twenty?
July 4th, 2008 @ 2:09 am
David refers to himself as “Craig David”. That means he’s hereby expelled from being Welsh. He’s now a Pembroke or whatever. Nothing to do with us. Official.
July 4th, 2008 @ 2:48 am
I need only hear David Gray once before I’m willing to take responsibility for organising Al-Qaeda activity worldwide.
Damien Rice makes me want to be a suicide bomber. Sure, there’s the wonder of the six million virgins and all-you-can-eat buffet of the afterlife, and the glory of the murder of infidels, but mostly, I crave the suicide.
July 4th, 2008 @ 4:20 am
He is such a miserable moany old whiner. His next CD should be titled, ‘Music to Kill Yourself Slowly By.’
July 4th, 2008 @ 6:59 am
He does babble on, doesn’t he?
July 4th, 2008 @ 7:01 am
It could save us a load of money on prisons. Instead of jail, a criminal is given an iPod with only 3 albums on it – “Phil Collins’ Greatest Hits”, “The Very Best of Michael Bolton” and “Now That’s What I Call Portugese Eurovision Entries”.
If Lyin’ Eyes is found guilty in the hitman trial she should be made to listen to the song “Lying Eyes” for the rest of her life. Listening to the Eagles would make me throw myself out the window. Which is a bit wussy, since I live in a bungalow, but the sentiment is there.
July 4th, 2008 @ 7:47 am
back on top form I see, you could have mentioned Ben Laden, but what about dampbacks?
July 4th, 2008 @ 8:31 am
oh. i like David Gray.
July 4th, 2008 @ 8:33 am
That braying horse faced fucker Leona Lewis actually makes me vomit blood, David Gray only makes my head numb…as for Damien Rice, I am rendered speechless. The geneva Convention needs to be rewritten to take into account these modern torture techniques.
July 4th, 2008 @ 8:34 am
You are just such a contrarian, Rosie.
July 4th, 2008 @ 8:40 am
Today the question is who was the greatest American.
General Custer was the greatest American, he was cunt, and there is 200,20,000000, other cunts to prove it.
July 4th, 2008 @ 8:43 am
I would claim that Greatest American is a contradiction of terms. They are all cunts.
July 4th, 2008 @ 8:45 am
there are a lot of those c-words being bandied about of late.
allegedly.
July 4th, 2008 @ 8:54 am
And the Jocks useless cunts at tennis, but there is fewer of the cunts.
July 4th, 2008 @ 8:57 am
Americans ….. amateur torture. They got the song right, but get Brian Fucking Kennedy and the Fucking Corrs to do a cover version and there you have the ultimate weapon of mass destruction.
A close second would be the godawful dire Ballad of Ronnie Drew, what a load of shite, I nearly crashed the car a few weeks ago trying to change station when it came on.
July 4th, 2008 @ 9:02 am
Yep, Jocks are only rated tenth in world at tennis, unlike the fucking bogtrotting mucksavages who are a renowned force in world sporting events.
July 4th, 2008 @ 9:04 am
We don’t play tennis because it’s too gay, you snowballing cunt, PP.
July 4th, 2008 @ 9:08 am
They should bring back hanging for the bastards that anything to do with Balad of Ronnie Drew, and that means the cunts who listen to it also.
Bono ShitHouse..
July 4th, 2008 @ 9:09 am
You don’t play tennis because it is always raining, unlike Scotland of course where the weather is quite tropical…if by that I mean the average rainfall of a tropical rainforest. You knacker blowing deviant.
July 4th, 2008 @ 9:12 am
Andy Murray though, eh? What a curly cunt.
July 4th, 2008 @ 9:18 am
The trouble I have with tennis is it is a bit fucking dull, second only to the Olympics. Most tennis players lack personality, and what I really detest is all those poncey English cunts with their Union Jack Hats and the belief that the UK are entitled to win against Johnny Foreigner because they once had a fucking empire spanning the globe. It would be a good day for mankind if the napalmed Wimbledon.
July 4th, 2008 @ 9:23 am
Yes, but all those years of ‘Come on, Timmy’ means they’ve missed the boat somewhat. Henman Hill should have been obliterated.
July 4th, 2008 @ 9:26 am
Ahh haaa haaaa. David Fucking Beige used as torture, I love it.
July 4th, 2008 @ 9:30 am
Sade used to make me spill the beans as a teenager.
July 4th, 2008 @ 9:33 am
Different kind of beans, Grover.
July 4th, 2008 @ 9:37 am
I like tennis, I had fellow from Wexford and after two weeks his balls swelled up and went yellow, all the quare ones at Mass were mad jealous of me..happy days.
July 4th, 2008 @ 9:40 am
James Blunt would out-torture a david gray/damien rice duet.
Remember when that was on the radio about 20 times a day on every channel?
I used to feel rage . . . so much rage.
July 4th, 2008 @ 9:41 am
you’re beautiful . . . you’re beautiful
July 4th, 2008 @ 9:43 am
Other Torture Songs:
Dexy’s Midnight Runners – Come on Eileen
Madness – House of Fun
The Cranberries – Zombie (ah-a ah-a ooh ooh ooh)
July 4th, 2008 @ 9:46 am
I was at Electric Picnic a couple of years ago when appropriately named Blunt was playing. Some guy had a T-Shirt with “James Blunt Must Leave” written on the front and “in a body bag” on the back. He had a load of eggs ready to throw at him on stage but was booted out sadly.
Blunt and Beige, music for people with fuck all imagination.
July 4th, 2008 @ 9:46 am
My nightmare torture song is that one that goes – ‘life, oh life, oooh liiiife…’
fuckin hate that
or ‘underneath your clothes’ by shakira. aaaaaarrrrgggghhhh
July 4th, 2008 @ 9:48 am
anything by that ubercunt billy joel, he could grace the guantanamo microphones for some agressive waterboarding anytime.
July 4th, 2008 @ 9:51 am
guy had a T-Shirt with “James Blunt Must Leave” written on the front and “in a body bag” on the back.
That stranger is my new hero.
SG, that “life, oh life” song would be most suitable at executions.
July 4th, 2008 @ 9:54 am
dare i say i like david gray and damien rice?
i can’t stand jack johnson tho… even just typing his name gives me a headache, and that video of him surrounded by cartoon monkeys, argh!
July 4th, 2008 @ 9:55 am
Celine Dion, Mariah Carey, Shitney Houston all played back to back would make most people scream and writhe in agony.
July 4th, 2008 @ 9:56 am
You can say it tatoca, but we may have to hunt you down and kill you afterwards.
July 4th, 2008 @ 9:59 am
You woudn’t get close to him, the sound of Rice and Gray blaring from his stereo would drive you back, a kind of sonic force field, you would have to find a deaf assasin, but then you would have difficulty in telling him who to bump off.
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:03 am
Twenty, when next you feel an urge to slag off your lovely neighbours across the Irish sea, please pause, and identify the nationality of the undisputed enema voiced cunt correctly..The cuntbutlering minstrel of mediocrity that you refer to; “David Gray” was born in Manchester.. he only moved to Solva in order to incite more anti-English fervour. You did the same with the bastard who killed his kids.. he was a Scouser.. he just thought that killing them in a beauty spot Wales would be nicer.
and yes holemaster – “come on eileen”… kevin Rowland should be strangled slowly with his own dungarees to that song by a fat thai tranny called eirreen..I would enjoy that.. better go now.
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:04 am
CELINE DION AND DANA TO MERGE
FOLLOWING weeks of speculation, plastic scarey Canadian christian Celine Dion and plastic scarey Irish Christian, Dana Rosemary Scallon have decided to merge. Lawyers are hard at work putting together a deal that satisfies both parties.
“We feel that we share the same values and beliefs and are music has the same message so we thought, why not merge and pool our resources and reach a wider market” said both of them. Asked what the new name would be, Dana replied softly “Well now, I wouldn’t like to be premature but perhaps something like Dana Dion or Celine Scallon. It would have to represent both of our former entities”.
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:11 am
I’d hate to think I was offending the Welsh without due cause, papalamour. Post amended.
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:15 am
Wikipedia entry for David Gray:
“His musical career received early support from a dedicated Republic of Ireland fan base.”
It’s all your fault you fuckers.
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:15 am
puerile, if your last comment was about twenty’s difficulty in killing me, know that i’m a lady :) not a him!!!
(damn, i just made it easier for twenty to hunt me down now)
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:16 am
“know that i’m a lady :) not a him!!!”
Little Britain Style?
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:17 am
no no no!!! real lady!!!
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:25 am
Apologies Tatoca, I didn’t think real ladies frequented this site (sorry Jo)
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:25 am
“Fake Welsh” that sounds good.
We have got Duffy though! she is shite, fake and she is genuinely Welsh.
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:35 am
Achy Breaky Heart
Harvest Moon by Neil “Castrato” Young
Some load of shite that used to go “what a beautiful world it would be, what a glorious time to be free”
And, I’m sorry, but The Fields of Athenry. Why is it so popular?
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:36 am
It’s very hard to sound angry when I’ve that picture beside anything I say.
It’s like Paddington bear telling someone to fuck off.
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:39 am
heh heh, lady… no, PP, I think that was a fair comment.
Nonny’s a lady, I think she said.
Zombie would definitely be my no 1 torture song. The off key caterwauling – ugh.
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:45 am
I dunno, I had a friend going to The US soem years ago, we all had a drunken dinner, got the dart into town, there was some drunk lad singing songs on the train and everyone joined in, culminating in the Fields, in Tara Street Station, echoing round the plastic roofy thing, and even though they were having a laugh it raised the hair on the back of my neck.
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:46 am
winds of change by the scorpions
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:46 am
The Fields of Athenry. Why is it so popular?
Cos it’s got IRA/Sinn Fein connotations.
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:47 am
I must have some Welsh in me, I shagged a coal miner as token of good will in the Thatcher era.
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:50 am
David Gray raped me.
Aurally. But it was rape all the same. Don’t try and tell me it wasn’t. I’m a victim.
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:52 am
Lowwww Lieeeeee the fieeeeeeelds of Athenryyyyyyyy
It’s fucking annoying like when some mahogany skinned smoke wrinkled Dublin knacker in Santa Ponza kicks off with “Summertime”. They never know it all and they sing it very badly and usually end up in a fit of smoker cough (the cleaning lady hackle).
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:00 am
I was at a wedding recently where everyone started singing the Mass in Irish at 4am….. Ag Criost An Siol makes me weepy for some reason but only when properly sung.
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:02 am
Very true, HM, and if they start to sing “Danny Boy” you know you’ve two minutes to leave before they attempt the ‘Tis I’ll be here’ line and shatter every glass in the bar.
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:04 am
I meant very true about the Summertime comment, but you’re right about ‘Ag Criost an Siol’ as well, it’s fabulous when sung well.
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:15 am
Didnt we Irish ressurect David Gray from obscurity. Fucking crowd of cunts going to Whelans thinking they are the epicentre of the indieverse. And now its cool to hate the jammy bastard. Yeah too late just like its too late to dis James Blunt the whinging cunt coz you all bought his album. Isnt it a shame he turned out to be a posh pratt with a face like a bag of spanners instead of the dreamcatcher you all thought he would be. Fair fucks to him I say and glad he is a pill popping cad in Ibiza to boot.
Anyway being retrospectively cool is shit and about as funny as the hundredth time that a PA system declared that Peig Sayers was a witch. Oh ha fucking ha!
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:17 am
Pat, I never bought an album or went to a gig by either of these dudes.
You sound like GlueStain
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:24 am
He does all right doesn’t he?
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:28 am
Dunno who Gluestain is but he obviously has issues.
And when I said “you all” I obviously excluded you SG because you are a freak.
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:28 am
One thing that really gets me pissed off is the uber music fan who hates any band that most other people like. “…Oh yeah I bought their first EP at their first ever gig but they’re gone to shit now….”. They think they’re shit cool but in fact they are extremely fucking annoying, like an introverted teenager (except in their 30s).
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:32 am
That does piss me off but it also gets my goat when I “discover” a band and then ages later everyone loves them and doesnt pay me the homage I deserve.
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:32 am
Puerile, is that really a pooey 9 on your gravatar? I’m really doing my best to pretend it’s a chocolate curl. Just tell me it’s a chocolate curl, even if it isn’t. Please. It’d make me feel a lot better.
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:39 am
“That does piss me off but it also gets my goat when I “discover” a band and then ages later everyone loves them and doesnt pay me the homage I deserve.”
See above comment number 64
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:39 am
‘And when I said “you all” I obviously excluded you SG because you are a freak.’
Up your Jap’s eye with a harp string, you shite caked droopy cunt.
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:44 am
Sorry PCB, it should have changed now, to a half full urine sample bottle with a smoking smiley face. The poo was part of my marketing plan for “Shitter” the web service, which was going on Dragons Den until this bunch of bastards shot my idea down in flames.
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:47 am
Holemaster the difference is I dont go off the band I just should be given my kudos royalties.
So dont be such a smart cunt because you are not smart ..
Supergrover – jeez give a man a compliment!!
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:47 am
What Rice shortage? According to the Asia Sentinel, the Philippines has enough Damien Rice CDs in storage to last 45 days. ‘Nobody wants the fucker,’ claims Rosario Bella Guzman, executive editor of local think tank IBON Foundation, after local Rice stocks increased by over 20 percent in the first quarter of the year. ‘It’s going rank on the fucking shelves here,’ she continued, using curiously Joe Pesci-like hand gestures. ‘And The Blower’s Daughter? What the fuck was that about? The fluffy-chinned fuck floats like a cannonball round here, that’s for fuckin’ sure. He’s about as welcome as a case of Subic Bay crabs after shore leave. Fuckin’ Irish.’
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:59 am
“So dont be such a smart cunt because you are not smart ..”
Smart I am not. Intelligent I am.
July 4th, 2008 @ 12:01 pm
Jesus Holemaster you sound like that little green cunt from Star Wars. Jedi I am.
July 4th, 2008 @ 12:03 pm
Oh fuck off you pedantic prick
July 4th, 2008 @ 12:08 pm
“There are songs I could listen to over and over and over again.”
How about over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over again?
nothing wrong with what he’s saying.
July 4th, 2008 @ 12:09 pm
Like a monkey with a minituare symbol
July 4th, 2008 @ 12:12 pm
Why is everyone tetchy today? Sun is shining, it’s Friday and i have just booked my holiday. Be happy you bunch of sour fuckers!
July 4th, 2008 @ 12:16 pm
tra la la! I’m happy PP.
July 4th, 2008 @ 12:17 pm
So what happens if the hard-bitten Al Qaeda operative is a big follower of easy listening music and just sits there manacled to his chair humming along to to all the shite he’s being bombarded with, fondly recalling the time he got his mate Abdullah to sing a long to ‘achy, breaky heart’ while he strapped him into a semtex waistcoat?
July 4th, 2008 @ 12:21 pm
Heartbreaker. Dionne Warwick.
July 4th, 2008 @ 12:27 pm
B’dum, of course you’re not wrong, but that is not really the point of the post.
July 4th, 2008 @ 12:33 pm
theres only so much of any cunt with an acoustic guitar anyone can take. ‘cept Fiona Apple of course. I dont of her songs mind you.
July 4th, 2008 @ 12:34 pm
Is there ever a point to any of these posts Jo? Or are you looking deeper than your average goon?
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:01 pm
Heh, well, I do wonder what the ratio of genuinely impassioned rants to rants for a laugh is sometimes.
I have to confess to once enjoying the musical stylings of David Gray. But then the easy listening aspect of his songs became more and more evident, and he enchants me no longer – almost as if someone had played me an ipod full of powerful eighties keyboard music…
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:12 pm
Jo, I confess to being a serial ‘rant for a laugh’ type of writer.
Mostly, I am far too lazy to get proper angry at anything or anyone.
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:15 pm
usually mine are just for laughs too.
That Blunt cuntass did genuinely make me angry once upon a time though.
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:15 pm
Oooh look at Jo the teacher’s pet “I read the book sir”
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:16 pm
there’s a very good point to my comments; they’re to help me reach my daily quota on this site.
My opinion on the matter is why pointlessly attack someone like David Gray(who everyone knows is crap) than attack someone like say… John Lennon?
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:19 pm
A mate of mine gave a David Blunt to an ex and wrote a note saying song 3 at 2.43 seconds which referred to the part where the much maligned warbler sang “and I still hold your hand in the rain, In the rain when I’m asleep”.
Jesus I was mortified for him, especially seeing that the mate was actually me!!!
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:21 pm
Sorry that was meant to say “James Blunt cd” – I couldnt type properly coz of the shame.
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:21 pm
Heh PattheRat, Hot Chip!
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:21 pm
John Lennon is dead.
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:23 pm
John Lennon is dead.
So.
He was still a druggie hippy cunt.
I liked some of his tunes though.
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:25 pm
Offended I am at these comments to my friend directed.
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:25 pm
Well that was in response to b’dum who wondered why people didn’t pick on Lennon instead of David Gray.
If David Gray was dead I wouldn’t write posts about him being a cunt then.
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:28 pm
Really? Would you write posts of joy about how you’d killed him, instead?
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:29 pm
Hmm, calling Twenty ‘Sir’… interesting image, there.
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:30 pm
Morgor, there is something incredibly naff about using the term ‘druggie’
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:32 pm
Really? Would you write posts of joy about how you’d killed him, instead?
I would certainly give that some thought were I the one to carry out the wondrous task.
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:32 pm
Oooh Jo is asking for a caning from Twenty methinks.
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:33 pm
SG, i think the word naff is more naff than druggie.
Liam Lawlor was a great man.
But before he died he was an absolute cunt.
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:33 pm
True torture would be strapped into a chair having Frank Carson telling you jokes non stop while having your thoughts read out to you in real time by Daniel O’Donnell
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:34 pm
“Oooh Jo is asking for a caning from Twenty methinks.”
ye durty fecker PP
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:35 pm
pointing out the naffness of naff is naffer
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:36 pm
Now there is a cunt of the highest order, Grand master spunk weevil Daniel O Donnell.
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:36 pm
Jo been a naughty girl then !!
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:37 pm
I never heard Yoda call anyone a fecker, although…
A fecker you are Darth Vader.
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:38 pm
did you ever wonder would anyone notice if you just stopped posting here?
for example, there was a regular by the name of itchybollix.
just disappeared.
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:38 pm
This isn’t a naff competition.
If it was, i’d kick your ass.
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:39 pm
Naff said
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:39 pm
there was a regular by the name of itchybollix
his rotten corpse is stinking up his lonely one bedroom apartment in tallaght.
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:39 pm
fine; angus young, roger waters, lou reed, keith richards, pete townshend, noel gallagher…
all those(and many more) deserve some extra hate, you’ve really taken the fun out by not allowing dead people… they’re almost all bastards.
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:40 pm
Itchybollix scratched himself to death…RIP Itchy and his colony of crabs.
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:40 pm
He was in Donabate, across the railway line from me.
Nice bloke.
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:41 pm
Where IS itchybollix? Maybe ran off with Scratchycu..
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:41 pm
But maybe the itchiness gor to him in the end.
Death by cheesegrater. Ouch.
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:41 pm
Not that I live there, of course.
Offaly, honest.
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:42 pm
Shut up Yoda
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:44 pm
Back on topic. How much would you need to get paid to work in Dunnes during X-Mas as the cd of X-mas hits plays on repeat all day everyday for a month?
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:50 pm
Stop trying to change the subject Pat
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:54 pm
Oh, and regarding Itchybollix.
Does nobody remember the time I was to meet him at a Fall gig on 16th March? Eh? Hello? Anybody home?
I’ll shut up now. I’ve already said too much.
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:55 pm
There’s a whole chapter covering the use of Daniel O’Donnell in the United Nations Charter on Human Rights.
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:56 pm
Jesus MB, I just clicked on your avatar, woahh the balls!
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:57 pm
Every time you click them, I feel it.
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:58 pm
haha
July 4th, 2008 @ 1:58 pm
I think they play it far more than a month – it starts in September now.
That Carson/O Donnell idea has me near tears of horror.
Donabate is Far Away.
What’s a better word than druggie? Drugtivist? On who Dances with Substances?
July 4th, 2008 @ 2:01 pm
There is no word, Jo.
There is Junkie for a smackhead.
Otherwise it’s just uncool to refer to it at all.
July 4th, 2008 @ 2:01 pm
Jo, I reckon you called them someone With Drugs
July 4th, 2008 @ 2:03 pm
I think that somewhere in the maelstrom of cunt-slinging above, Come On Eileen has been mislabelled as anything but a fucking brilliant song. You just have to separate the song from the mental image of eighty-six of your aunts high-kicking to it at every wedding that’s ever happened.
July 4th, 2008 @ 2:03 pm
“Every time you click them, I feel it.”
What about the rolly ball on the mouse, feel this……?
July 4th, 2008 @ 2:05 pm
What’s a better word than druggie?
How about ‘geezer’?
I like the word ‘geezer’.
I wanna be a geezer!
Pick geezer.
July 4th, 2008 @ 2:05 pm
Yeah, but that sounds like a dealer.
And Supergrover, I’m sorry, but you sound a little bit like an apologist.
July 4th, 2008 @ 2:07 pm
Sorry, I dithered too long over the apologist comment, dealer thing was in response to Holemaster.
MB, I think you might quite possibly be a geezer, alright.
July 4th, 2008 @ 2:07 pm
SG, how about “degenerate”?
July 4th, 2008 @ 2:10 pm
“Well now, I wouldn’t like to be premature but perhaps something like Dana Dion or Celine Scallon. It would have to represent both of our former entities”.
Deline Scallion would cover it.
July 4th, 2008 @ 2:12 pm
Ooops i posted as elvis there a while back, my apologies elvis, didn’t know you were alive.
July 4th, 2008 @ 2:15 pm
Deline Scallion – beautiful.
July 4th, 2008 @ 2:17 pm
Agghh
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/7488894.stm
July 4th, 2008 @ 2:22 pm
Who allowed that woman to be reclassified “legally” as a man?
That’s just stupid.
July 4th, 2008 @ 2:26 pm
Totally healthy? I don’t fucking think so. No way, with the amount of hormones they will have absorbed.
I’m sympathetic to people who feel they were born the wrong sex.
But I also read a convincing argument by Germaine Greer about how women are not defined merely my not having penises.
Being transexual doesn’t necessarily make you a woman…
July 4th, 2008 @ 2:27 pm
Or vice versa
July 4th, 2008 @ 2:28 pm
His wife Nancy must be truly feeling fucked up. I reckon they only had the baby to make money out the chat show circuit.
July 4th, 2008 @ 2:32 pm
Ah what harm are they doing – as long as the nipper is healthy and happy and well looked after.
July 4th, 2008 @ 2:32 pm
It makes me think science is bad.
July 4th, 2008 @ 2:33 pm
How far will we go? Dr Moreau’s Island? Twenty’s boyband creature?
Heh, the Isle of Twenty Major. Stay inside the compound!
July 4th, 2008 @ 2:35 pm
I dunno, DG, maybe. But to feel so strongly negative about your gender that you change it, but still want to keep your womb and have a desperate urge to get pregnant? That’s an emotional mess in my book.
July 4th, 2008 @ 2:39 pm
There are plenty of children who do badly under so called “normal” family arrangements. I cannot help but think the same as Dessiegee.
July 4th, 2008 @ 2:45 pm
Emm, how exactly did a transgender man get pregnant?
Like, kept the womb and all, grand, but, like you know, what entrances are available?
July 4th, 2008 @ 2:46 pm
A chara,
DAvid Gray made me so mad at Oxygen a few years back, (then Witnness) That I wanted to throw something at him. But the clever security men had removed everything throwable from us, except our plastic cups of beer. And I wasnt wasting any beer on that fucker. It wasnt even the music that bothered me, easy listening shit, it was his condescending tone. He is actually a complete wanker, singing aside…
July 4th, 2008 @ 2:48 pm
Jo, it does seem a bit messed up, to be sure.
But in the grand scale of things, no harm done. Humanity as we know it is in trouble from many angles.
I’d worry more about war, disease, corporatocracy, rampant overpopulation, than some emotional oddities.
July 4th, 2008 @ 2:49 pm
She’s not a man anyway. Getting your tits chopped off doesnt make you one nor does having a hairy chest. She is a lesbian and thats it.
Dont see how anyone could be confused or how anything can be called a “sex change”.
She is not a man. I bet you she cant reverse a car.
July 4th, 2008 @ 2:50 pm
but what about the puppetmasters SG?
July 4th, 2008 @ 2:52 pm
those cunts have it coming to them. years of hands up my ass and not a bar of soap in sight
July 4th, 2008 @ 3:01 pm
I dont really get the transgendered thing myself but any changes made are purely cosmetic and at the end of the day whatever makes you happy.
The fact that “He” kept all his “giblets” for the purpose of having a baby may sound a bit strange but there was no way that “He” would be allow to adopt and this was the only way of doing it.
July 4th, 2008 @ 3:04 pm
So what, a woman had a baby! Happens every day, how news worthy is it really?
July 4th, 2008 @ 3:09 pm
I think it was more the photo of a woman actually mowing the lawn that made the world gasp in shock.
July 4th, 2008 @ 3:11 pm
for example, there was a regular by the name of itchybollix.
just disappeared.
Left a comment last month.
July 4th, 2008 @ 3:11 pm
But people come and people go…c’est la vie, that’s just the way it goes.
Oh yeah.
July 4th, 2008 @ 3:16 pm
Huh? Chick with dick pops sprog from ass mows grass shocker?
July 4th, 2008 @ 3:16 pm
Pattherat: Excellent Work!!! I would high five you now, try and get some more sexist jokes in before the feminist backlash.
July 4th, 2008 @ 3:18 pm
But people come and people go…c’est la vie, that’s just the way it goes.
Oh yeah.
My god Twenty, you’re sounding almost wistful and maudlin – What’s up – Is it all this baby talk?
July 4th, 2008 @ 3:23 pm
I miss the simpler times, when Robbie Nevil topped the charts…
July 4th, 2008 @ 3:27 pm
I had to look him up.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Robbie_Nevil
July 4th, 2008 @ 3:28 pm
i had to look up Robbie Nevil (see link).
You’re such an old man Twenty.
July 4th, 2008 @ 3:28 pm
Robbie Nevil – You’ve officially lost it. David Gray has finally pushed you over….
July 4th, 2008 @ 3:33 pm
According to Morgors link Robbie Nevil is partially responsible for “high school musical”. I’ve read recently that “high school musical” is some kind of sinister mormon plot to recruit youngsters and therefore the bould Mr. Nevil is a fully signed up name tag wearing mormon cunt.
July 4th, 2008 @ 3:38 pm
A fully signed up name tag wearing mormon one-hit wonder cunt!
July 4th, 2008 @ 3:42 pm
In defense of Mormons they do practise polygamy, that must take some doing it’s hard enough trying to keep one happy without several other moany cunts whining about the grass needing cut, shelf putting up, spending too much time in the pub etc etc. How many vists to fucking B&Q do they have to do on Bank Holidays.
July 4th, 2008 @ 3:44 pm
Say you will,
Say you wont
Say youll do
What I dont.
Say you will
Say the truth
Say to me
Cest la vie
July 4th, 2008 @ 3:48 pm
As they say in France,
Esther Rantzen is a cunt.
July 4th, 2008 @ 3:48 pm
What’s that kid going call his birth parent?
Daddy, Mammy? Dammy? Maddy? Dother? Dum? Mad?
July 4th, 2008 @ 3:49 pm
Bewitched.*shudder* I haven’t forgotten. or forgiven.
July 4th, 2008 @ 3:51 pm
PP – The one’s practicing Polygamy dont actually listen to them all. Usually wife no. 1 is in charge of all the other wives who tend to get younger and yonger with each passing year. Most of these girls are married off by their fathers at 14/15 years of age to older men. The whole thing smacks of Pedophilia.
July 4th, 2008 @ 3:53 pm
What’s that kid going call his birth parent?
Daddy, Mammy? Dammy? Maddy? Dother? Dum? Mad?
Muddy.
July 4th, 2008 @ 3:53 pm
“smacks of Pedophilia.”
No it’s Idaho. That’d never be allowed in Philly.
July 4th, 2008 @ 3:53 pm
France – I once went there to visit my cousins.
As is customary the students were striking so I joined in to feel like a revolutionary.
All the vitriol was directed at the Mister of Education so we staged a protest outside his office and equipped ourselves with tomatoes, rotten eggs etc.
As the Minister appeared from his offices I launched my rotten egg at him and hit him on his suit. As I was about to fetch another to throw my cousin stopped me and explained
“In France one egg is un ouef”
July 4th, 2008 @ 3:55 pm
Hey Pat, you been to Twenty’s college of piss poor puns?
July 4th, 2008 @ 3:55 pm
““In France one egg is un ouef”
Pull the Ubh amhain
July 4th, 2008 @ 3:56 pm
And a happy fourth to all you cunts.
July 4th, 2008 @ 3:56 pm
You’re cracking us up Pat. Keep ‘em rolling.
July 4th, 2008 @ 3:58 pm
What’s that kid going call his birth parent?
Daddy, Mammy? Dammy? Maddy? Dother? Dum? Mad?
Muddy.
It’s a (David) grey area.
July 4th, 2008 @ 4:01 pm
For years I thought Yoko Ono was one egg!
July 4th, 2008 @ 4:08 pm
Only fish puns are worse than egg puns.
July 4th, 2008 @ 4:08 pm
Me too. And I thought Sonny Bono was Bono’s youngfella.
July 4th, 2008 @ 4:09 pm
Ah but every pun has its plaice.
July 4th, 2008 @ 4:09 pm
Twenty, what would you consider to be the caviar of puns then?
July 4th, 2008 @ 4:11 pm
Imagine that kid growing up and learning the birds and the bees.
Daddy whats that between your legs. Thats my mangina son!
Not nice and normal like in our day.
Grandda whats that between your legs?
Thats my penis
Gee its big, when will I get one like that?
When your Grandma goes to bingo
July 4th, 2008 @ 4:11 pm
You’ve ruined my day Pat.
July 4th, 2008 @ 4:14 pm
I probably should have put a warning on that one alright
July 4th, 2008 @ 4:19 pm
I don’t get it.
Where is this Bingo?
Is Bingo the name of the dog?
What’s the little boy’s name?
Do you even think before you post these stupid comments?
I tried googling ‘Bingo’ – Nothing!
July 4th, 2008 @ 4:25 pm
Pattherat started it….
What’s the hardest part of having a sex change?
Changing the smell of cheese to fish or inserting the anchovies so they don’t fall out…
And lastly, What smells worse then an anchovy?
An Anchovies Cunt…..
July 4th, 2008 @ 4:27 pm
Take that back Dessie. I just read it out loud to my Aunt Chovie, and you have her in fuckin’ tears.
July 4th, 2008 @ 4:28 pm
I probably should have put a warning on that one alright
No i was referring to the puns.
The grandad joke was pretty funny.
July 4th, 2008 @ 4:31 pm
MB – It must be the way you tell em cos she broke her gee laghing when I cracked it the other night AT THE BINGO…..
July 4th, 2008 @ 4:36 pm
I just cant get people to enjoy my puns.
Last week I told a ten of those gags to my mates but did it make them laugh, no pun in ten did
July 4th, 2008 @ 4:38 pm
Gah!
July 4th, 2008 @ 4:42 pm
Puns are overrated anyway.
July 4th, 2008 @ 4:45 pm
Like Mary Harney – She was told to enjoy her rise in popularity and slice of fame but she over ate it
July 4th, 2008 @ 4:47 pm
I better stop or I’ll be sent to a punintentiary
July 4th, 2008 @ 4:48 pm
“What a fool believes” by Micheal McDonald would do it for me. ARRRGGGGGHHHHHHH
July 4th, 2008 @ 4:48 pm
puns are for cunts – punning cunts/cunning punts
July 4th, 2008 @ 4:52 pm
Ah thats a cunning stunt
July 4th, 2008 @ 4:53 pm
Next week in recession hit Ireland – Anagrams
July 4th, 2008 @ 4:56 pm
I’m out of here – I’m going to hit a boozer on the way home for a “Punt” of plain, cos a “punt” of plain is yer only man.
Enjoy 1 and all………
July 4th, 2008 @ 5:14 pm
just back from the Off-License.
There were a gaggle of young girls hanging around the doorway as I went in, minding two young boys in buggys.
As I came back out, my arms laden with Dutch Gold, I heard a squeeky voice from behind me.
“Givvus two cans mister, and I’ll blow yer mickey fer ye.”
I have to admit, I was tempted for a minute.
But fuck it, in the end I just carried on walking home. He didn’t have his older brother’s good looks.
July 4th, 2008 @ 5:48 pm
I seem to be attractive to youngish knacker girls for some reason. I’m often whistled at and shouted at from passing Micras. Now I would consider myself to be a very average looking fella, not tall, not toned, just average. So what the fuck is it?
Bring on the slagging….
July 4th, 2008 @ 6:05 pm
Do you know what it is Holemaster? – They think you’re me.
By the way, would you fuck a knacker?
What about his wife?
July 4th, 2008 @ 6:12 pm
That must be it. I’m off for a weekend of heavy drinking, starting now.
July 4th, 2008 @ 6:51 pm
The thing about moving the lawn isn’t sexist, it’s true.
HE mows the lawn, I change the bed clothes. Sometimes.
But it’s not true about reversing – there’s a CAlifornian writer, Pat Califia, who had a sex change, femle to male and said that with the hormones s/he was taking s/he things like spacial awareness definitely changed and she became even more male in her outlook.
I think if you just think this is about homosexuality you don’t really know what you’re talking about – gender issues are real, and painful. Feeling you’re the wrong sex has to be a painful life sentence. Not everyone changes their sexual preference, though some do. I think a lot of people don’t try to change their vaginas into penises or vice versa, as the results are still pretty crappy. But I think if you hate your breasts enough to get them cut off, what you’re going through is legitimate.
I’m not arguing that a transsexual woman shouldn’t have a child, more that physicaly, it’s going to be messed up. I don’t know though. Sure hetero parents mess up children excellently. But ‘Daddy used to be a woman’ isn’t going to be easy on anyone either.
July 4th, 2008 @ 7:03 pm
Twenty, what would you consider to be the caviar of puns then?
Anything to do with 80s music, obviously. I’m ignoring your one there though.
July 4th, 2008 @ 7:12 pm
But ‘Daddy used to be a woman’ isn’t going to be easy on anyone either.
It’s a good title for a book to promote on Oprah though, isn’t it?
July 4th, 2008 @ 7:14 pm
I’m ignoring your one there though.
What do you mean? There was two of them in there!
July 4th, 2008 @ 7:16 pm
Salmon else will have to take up the fish/egg puns.
I’ve haddock enough.
July 4th, 2008 @ 7:21 pm
Sorry Twenty. I misread your comment. You meant ‘yer wan’ over there with the wonky eye. I thought you meant ‘you’re one’.
July 4th, 2008 @ 7:31 pm
Oh my God. I’ve just realised how drunk I am.
Does anyone want me to make them a superbly befitting gravatar, free of charge? I’m at me best when I’m off me head. Now is a good time.
monkeybawl@gmail.com
Tell me what you want. I won’t let you down. I’m expecting to be up all night, and will guarantee delivery to every freeloader out there by the morning.
If you don’t like it, don’t use it.
Full instructions on request.
July 4th, 2008 @ 7:37 pm
Hello, hello!
Is the Internet broken or something?
Earth to Internet. Hello, do you read me?
July 4th, 2008 @ 7:46 pm
Shit! Everybody seems to be out drinking, on the one night you should never go out drinking, – The Night Everybody Goes Out Drinking!
Oh well.
I feel like that gobshite in I Am Legend.
Except I’m not a 2-D character in a shit film with the crappiest ending in history, bar the alternative ending of the same film.
Or maybe I am?
July 4th, 2008 @ 8:44 pm
I’m ready.
Two cans in front of me, the rest chillin’ in the fridge.
Seated to my right, is the man they call ‘The Roller’. His hands are just a blur.
It’s looking good for an eventful night.
Bring it on!
July 4th, 2008 @ 8:51 pm
La, la-la, la-laaaaah!
Doobie-doobie-doobie, -doobie-doobie-doo!
Wheh-hoooooooo!!!
July 4th, 2008 @ 8:53 pm
I just remembered, there’s other stuff on the internet too.
Bye bye.
July 4th, 2008 @ 9:18 pm
is that it?. is it over? can I go out now?
July 4th, 2008 @ 9:19 pm
I actually love David Gray. Also, I’m 100% against torture. I wouldn’t condone the torture of Bush and Blair. Life in prison? Yes. Torture? Never.
July 4th, 2008 @ 9:26 pm
Jesus, where’s Monkey Balls when you need him.
July 4th, 2008 @ 9:27 pm
For fuck sake Fred.©
Stop hitting yourself.
July 4th, 2008 @ 9:27 pm
fuck. I thought MB was the only one left
July 4th, 2008 @ 9:28 pm
Will that do?
July 4th, 2008 @ 9:31 pm
Yeah good work MB.
July 4th, 2008 @ 9:42 pm
Will that do? Obviously, it won’t do.
Right then Fred, (heh!) you cum-encrusted, wank-stained squirt of an immature, (yet still premature) ejaculation’s waste, – in the name of everything we hold dear to us, what do you think…
…hang on a minute. What did he actually do?
July 4th, 2008 @ 9:45 pm
Torture you say? Torture is working the holiday in the States with millions of Yanks celebrating their “so-called” victory over us. If we English really put our hearts into that fight, I would be having afternoon tea in Southern California rather than Starbucks. That is torture!
July 4th, 2008 @ 9:51 pm
Welcome back Proud Englishman.
I presume that by ‘we English‘, you actually mean other people, and not yourself.
Well done!
You have good reason to be proud.
July 4th, 2008 @ 9:51 pm
I tried to watch The Constant Gardener just now on the telly. I just can’t do it. It’s full of…. you know……. um, well…… I’m not sure how to say this…. but unfinished… gosh….em sentences. Ralph Fiennes is unwatchable if you’re a man. He’s a geebag.
July 4th, 2008 @ 9:55 pm
Torture is working the holiday in the States with millions of Yanks celebrating their “so-called” victory over us.
why “so-called”? they kicked your arses. Now you’re their lapdog. harhar.
Everybody seems to be out drinking, on the one night you should never go out drinking, – The Night Everybody Goes Out Drinking!
yeah, fridays and saturdays are nearly the worst nights to go out, queues for everything, no taxis. ugh.
That said i’ll be out tomorrow.
July 4th, 2008 @ 9:55 pm
Proud Englishman, who’d have expected a tea party to kick off like that?
July 4th, 2008 @ 9:56 pm
The fact that you read, write, and speak English Monkey affirms our victory. I cannot believe how much I hate Yank ale.
July 4th, 2008 @ 9:57 pm
The English languish, I mean language comes in very handy.
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:00 pm
Proud Englishman. Je parle Francais aussi. Mais ce seullement pour baiser les filles.
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:01 pm
Why are you lot not out this evening?
Morgor and Holemaster, your system is English. Accept it.
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:02 pm
Je suis desolé. Je bais les hommes englaise aussi.
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:02 pm
I hate overly proud nationals.
the conquering english are just the conquering normans, who were the conquering vikings.
All hail the mighty nordic people, fine makers of furniture.
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:03 pm
I’ve accepted it. that’s for that PE.
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:03 pm
An mhaith Liathroidi de Mhoncai! Cad a ceapain tu foai an Sasanach?
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:04 pm
Yank beer is shit though to be fair.
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:06 pm
Tá an Sasanach amadán uafasach.
Fear beag ag caint faoi sean-stair.
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:07 pm
Is cunt mór é, an proud englishman.
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:09 pm
While I am impressed at your ability to toss an insult in French, facts are facts.
You hate proud nationals? Why? The Irish are always in the middle of a fight. Support your own for goodness sake. IKEA. That was a good one.
Oh, by the way, the Normans never really ended the Saxons. English proves that. Back to my pint after winning my point……….
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:09 pm
Níl sé ábalta caint ach i teanga amháin.
Is fúath liom asal chomh seo ag deanamh torann mór.
Níl fhios agam an focal le “smug”. Aon duine?
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:10 pm
Cinnte. Ach is maith liom é ar aon nos. Ceapaim go bhfuil Land Rover aige agus gunna mor dha bhareil.
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:12 pm
“Níl fhios agam an focal le “smug”. Aon duine?”
Sasanach
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:14 pm
My God PE, they’re tearing you apart there. Have you no response?
Hurry!
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:17 pm
Haha, Saxons are danes ya dope.
Not sure who was there before the Danes, probably the Angles i think. (german)
How does English prove anything? it’s a mixture of loads of languages.
The Irish are always in the middle of a fight? In what way?
I hate proud nationals because the proudest nationals are usually inbred morons who have never left their hometown and probably have a nice dash of racism thrown in.
What’s that really right wing political party in britain again? BNP I think. when i think of a proud national that’s the type I think of. Sinn Fein in Ireland. Those Basque equivalents etc etc.
Patriotism is your conviction that this country is superior to all other countries because you were born in it.
George Bernard Shaw
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:17 pm
Proud Englishman, we took your language and sexed it up, softened it and fucked slowly in the ass and made it our bitch. And not only that but we caint as Gaeilge freisin et le francais aussi comme le mon amie, ballon de monkey.
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:19 pm
What can I respond with? I do not know Gaelic. Oh well…….I do have one question for you…..Why cannot most of your politicians speak your own native tongue?
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:21 pm
Most of them can actually.
I must admit for a Greek, your King speaks good English.
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:22 pm
Sorry, he’s not the King is he, Lizzy wears the trousers.
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:23 pm
Why cannot most of your politicians speak your own native tongue?
cos they’re retards.
Another nice quote for you :
The people can always be brought to the bidding of their leaders. All you have to do is tell them that they are in danger of being attacked and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger.
Hermann Goering (1893 – 1946)
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:23 pm
I’m not too well up on the oul’ Gaeilge meself Homoerotic Englishman, or whatever your name is, but the gist of it is like this;
Blah, blah,….granny..blah, blah,….sucking him off,…blah, blah,…poor thing,…blah,…just wouldn’t stop,…blah, blah…all over her brand new nighty..blah, blah…wouldn’t mind,…blah, blah,..tiny cock.
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:25 pm
PE, we are only engaging in that old Irish past-time, Banter.
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:25 pm
What can I say to that? I believe in Western Civilization. I do not think it is racist to do so. The BNP? No! Fuck no! Sure you can find negatives…..However, we have brought good to the world as well. Hold on now…far too much drinking…this is going in a bad direction. I am doing a brilliant job of it.
Hole, our language survives.
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:26 pm
Monkey Balls, are you totally fucked yet?
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:28 pm
I am well and totally truly scrumptiously fucked.
It’s getting very hard to post comments ‘cos I can’t stop laughing at that gobshite.
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:29 pm
Every country has a BNP.
Anyway, we should have waited until you guys built us an underground before we rebelled.
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:30 pm
PE, you’re reminding of that character in the Fast Show…. and we were wery wery dwunk.
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:36 pm
Every country has a BNP.
I don’t think so. I may be wrong, but I don’t think even the Shinners fall into that cesspit category.
Isn’t racism an inherent ‘English’ disease?
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:36 pm
Lizzy. Fucking hell……I cannot let you see me laugh at that one. Morgor, come on now. Comparisons to Nazis? Those twats got fucked. Please. As the Yanks say, “Don’t be a tree-hugging hippie fuck.”
In what way you ask? This blog. That is “what way.” Three of you are on the attack. That is why I am here. This Yank Pub/Bar is boring me.
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:39 pm
I believe in Western Civilization.
me too
The BNP? No! Fuck no!
glad we agree again.
Ex-conquerers are the most hated countries on the earth, america being the current one.
Dunno about spain though to be honest.
I’m looking forward to wales and scotland getting their own governments.
What? you think the Nazis were that much different to how the English did things back in the day?
Just better propaganda and they won.
I guess you think the english charmed their way into India/Scotland/Wales/Ireland?
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:48 pm
It’s old history, a bygone era. In 10 to 15 years, England will be Independent of Westminster anyway. The old seat by the Thames will have no constituency left. Perhaps Bristol or Manchester would be seat of the English government. Maybe Scotland, Ireland, England and Wales could all unite under a Federation of Anglo-Celtic states? The Capital may even be Dublin.
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:50 pm
I am a gym teacher, and up until now I’ve been too timid to raise my voice. Thanks to morgor and the other gay men who comment here, I feel it’s time for me to speak out.
My pupils are sick of being forced to wear shorts and tight t-shirts for PE. The man is a pervert.
There now. I’ve said my bit. It’s up to others now.
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:50 pm
Fuck! I forgot about the Gravatar! Damn!!
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:52 pm
monkeyballs ya daft bollix!
actually does bollix have two l’s?
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:55 pm
The Yanks fucked themselves with Iraq. They had the world and us behind them with Afghanistan. They will find their way again. They are good at correcting their own mistakes. It just takes them a while.
We English ARE charming thank you very much. And with that, I must go back to drinking. This wireless connection is poor and the keyboard is beginning to move. Thank you for the Irish banter. Once again, I believe I was fucking brilliant. Hooray for me.
July 4th, 2008 @ 10:56 pm
I dunno morgor, it’s not me first language.
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:01 pm
Thank you for the Irish banter.
Hehe, not really banter, more arguing. I’d recommend changing your handle to be honest.
You awoke a hatred of England in me that i didn’t realise I had.
Check out my link.
Maybe i should stop drinking …
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:04 pm
Look here PE, we already knew you were going to jump up and admit you were with them as soon as they started winning, but we all know now that’s never going to happen.
Just run it by me again, -If someone wins something, they’re British at least, but probably, and most likely, they’re English. And if they lose, they’re Welsh or Scottish. The ones who should never have been allowed enter are the Irish, but you’ll accept their medals too if they win, is that it?
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:08 pm
Back to your Pimms PE! Careful on the way home in that old Jag, you don’t want to run over any of those wretched village boys, it’s a headache dealing with the paper work.
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:09 pm
I don’t think Germans should have to be ashamed to be German because of what Hitler and the Nazis did, but I don’t think they should be proud of it.
Far be it from me to make you feel guilty for being English and bear responsibility for centuries of oppression, strife, violence and theft but to openly boast about old conquests pisses me off.
FUCK YOU AND FUCK YOUR COUNTRY.
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:09 pm
Better go, my dinner guests are getting anxious.
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:10 pm
Right. Now I am truly leaving. I am typing with one finger and ale is on the display. Morgor, 58 trillion? Come on now. What would I be if I changed my name? What would that say to the world?
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:11 pm
“FUCK YOU AND FUCK YOUR COUNTRY.’
I fucked some of them.
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:15 pm
Proud Englishman. You are a cunt of the lowest order.
Why do you never engage with me? You’re making people think you’re a mate of mine.
Come and have a go at me! I mince you up, you ring-sucker!
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:19 pm
ok ok, I wouldn’t try to claim money back off England.
It would be fair but it’s not gonna happen.
I would however demand the return of all lands back to the native populations.
What’s done is done. (for that matter i don’t think Germany should still be paying Israel exhorbitant sums in reparation for WWII)
Various cunting English earls and counts still own huge swathes of land throughout Ireland and no doubt every other colony they’ve ever had.
That’s not right.
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:25 pm
fuckin’ hell, you lot are full of the ou’l yap this evening
everyone gone now?
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:25 pm
Holemaster, ní cheapaim go bhfuil an Sasanach saibhir (rich).
Cheapaim go bhfuil smaoineamh bómánta aige.
Ar aon nós beidh me a súgradh cluiche roimhaire arís agus ag ól cúpla canna eile.
Is maith liom de bheith ag argóint tar éis cúpla diochanna.
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:26 pm
nick cave thingy on telly, bushmills and a toke.
grand. sorted.
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:27 pm
éist le mo gaoith…
ripper!
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:31 pm
Táim í ngrá leat SG.
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:33 pm
Agus tusa, Morgor mo chroí
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:37 pm
ah, the eye-watering domestic accident that is the burnt nasal hair of the never-say-die smoker
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:41 pm
éist le mo gaoith… ripper!,
I did three, and almost a follyer-upper laughing at that!
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:45 pm
I think now might be the perfect time to start my own blog.
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:46 pm
nah
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:47 pm
then you’ll become a link tourist
backpacking around all the blogs dropping bog standard comments hither and thither in a vain attempt to attract the more fickle readers
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:55 pm
hehe, sounds like something you learned from experience.
July 4th, 2008 @ 11:58 pm
nah, never bothered. lot of cunts at it though
July 5th, 2008 @ 12:02 am
playing a tournament on full tilt poker
current position – 11 of 43 remaining
July 5th, 2008 @ 12:08 am
yeah, if i actually bothered with a blog, would i just stop if i had no visitors?
could i be arsed to keep it up?
would they be even vaguely interesting?
difficult questions, but not as difficult as what’s the capital of Ghana.
I can never remember those african cities.
July 5th, 2008 @ 12:10 am
G
July 5th, 2008 @ 12:14 am
hehe. technically I could just look it up.
But I’m hatching plans. out of my bottom.
maybe plans is the wrong word.
July 5th, 2008 @ 12:16 am
Accra, apparently
July 5th, 2008 @ 12:17 am
’tis a silly place
July 5th, 2008 @ 12:24 am
I was goign to engage Proud Englishman until I realised that as it is the country that gave us chavs, mongs and Simon Cowell, his name is a misnomer. So I will tell you a story, my brother and his mate were drinking in a bar, they were just that day on holiday and went on the piss. They sat in the “Darts Corner” and 8 hours later the darts team, plus spouses turned up and were rather upset that some of their space had been invaded. One of the wives had a mouth “like a jack russell’s arsehole” all puckered and severe.
Mark ( my brothers friend) decided that this would be the most opportune time to break wind…
Jack russell’s aresemouth turns to him and says;
“How dare you fart in front of me?”
and mark says, as only someone locked off his face can;
“Sorry love I didn’t know it was your turn”
July 5th, 2008 @ 12:27 am
hehe, that’s a good response.
I’d love to be able to do that but usually I come up with excellent retorts about 3 days later.
July 5th, 2008 @ 12:35 am
For SPARTA!!!!
July 5th, 2008 @ 12:40 am
where did that come out of FMC?
July 5th, 2008 @ 12:41 am
So did she fart or what?
C’mon, I hate it when yiz tell only half the joke!
July 5th, 2008 @ 12:42 am
there’s a pretty amusing clip for “300 PG” on you tube. (follow my link)
July 5th, 2008 @ 12:45 am
As FMC’s representative on Earth, I wish to make the following statement;
My client has nothing further to say
July 5th, 2008 @ 1:13 am
Rob, I believe morgor has sent you an e-mail.
You should answer him.
That’s all I know right now.
Be swift, or else do it tomorrow.
And Twenty, surely it’s only 7 days by now?
And 6 by the time you read this.
July 5th, 2008 @ 1:14 am
that’s a threat Rob. Nailerzz is a close friend of MB.
July 5th, 2008 @ 1:28 am
I have answered, fuck sake lads I was busy deleting my David gray back catalogue
July 5th, 2008 @ 2:17 am
That’s perfectly OK Rob. Twenty said you’ve to delete all that Carpenters shite aswell, including the ‘Diet With Karen’ video.
July 5th, 2008 @ 10:49 am
over. three. hundred. comments.
July 12th, 2008 @ 3:53 am
That David Grey song is pretty good..just me?
Barney the dinosaur however makes me feel like ripping his purple balls off and shoving them down his throat violently.
July 17th, 2008 @ 10:40 pm
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