See this recession business, I know I said I didn’t care, but frankly I think we should all be petrified. Everything is going to shit and nothing anyone can say can make the slightest bit of difference.
I read on Breakingnews.ie that Eamon Gilmore, leader of Labour, asked “if the Government planned a mid-term Budget to introduce emergency adjustments such as cutting public services, freezing pubic pay rises or increasing taxes”.
You know times are hard when politicians are considering freezing pubic pay rises, the lecherous cunts. Still, my main concern is that no matter what Brian Cowen says I just can’t help thinking ‘Damn, you are an ugly, ugly man and you make my face scrunch up in mild disgust when I see you’.
I know I should be above things like that but I just can’t help it. He is ugly. He does look like his tongue is too big for his mouth. He’s like a St Bernard crossed with the offpsring of Mary Harney and Andre the Giant. He looks like he should be wearing a bib at all times. I keep expect him to just start saying ‘flobbalobobabble’ because that’s what his mouth looks its doing when he talks. He’s so ugly he makes blind children cry. He was in the band that played in the bar in Star Wars when they first met Han Solo and Chewbacca and they didn’t even need to give him a mask.
It’s petty, I know. Childish, certainly. But we all make judgemens about people based on how they look. You might say you don’t, but you do. And my judgement of Brian Cowen is that he is too ugly for me to have any faith in him at all.
What Ireland needs is a charismatic, handsome leader. Someone with a twinkle in their eye and the kind of smile that makes the ladies hearts melt. Let’s be honest about this. He doesn’t even need to be that handsome at all. As a group of people politicians have to be about the ugliest of the lot. You get handsome binmen, pretty shop-assistants, hunky taxi drivers and sexy cleaning ladies but politicians, it’s like their very ugliness predisposes them to choose a life in politics.
Look at the politicans people talk about as being handsome. JFK, for example. He was certainly charismatic but it was only when compared to the likes of Richard Nixon that you could call him really handsome. That was because Nixon looked like a down sydrome beagle with a wad of piss-stained cotton wool in each cheek. Put him alongside Cary Grant and he was nothing. Nothing. He was the most handsome politican which is sort of like being the best Damien Rice tribute band. You’re just less shit than all the rest but still shit.
We want to have confidence in the people that run our country. Not look at them and want to gouge our own eyes out because they’re so fucking hideous they’d turn you to stone.
But maybe it’s simply that attractive people don’t get involved in politics. They become actors, TV presenters, singers, sportsmen or women and such. But if a square-jawed hunk were to tell me tomorrow that Ireland would be ok, that the recession won’t bite that badly, that we’d all be ok and if he told me that with a winning smile, fake or not, I’d be much happier than having to listen to Brian Cowen.
I just don’t trust ugly people. Especially ugly politicians. They know that the world has done them a bad turn, having power over a large group of the electorate is their revenge. You might call me petty but look at them, desperately grasping for power so they can feel good about themselves at last.
Fucking minging bastards. We’re definitely fucked.
Loving the sleek new style, Twenty.
Fab.
Cowen is an ugly bastard alright.
He`s a thick Biffo, what u expect!
Cheers, Medbh. I mean, look at him – http://newsfeed.tcm.ie/media/images/b/briancowenangry.jpg
I don’t want to look at him. He scares me. This is a great post, I agree totally. They’e all Dorian Gray’s paintings. Mary Harney is the same.
Given what he looks like, would you not think he’d stop sticking out his tongue and making funny faces for all the evil journalists to prey on?
He looks like he’s coughing Cowen ooties on us in this one
http://www.eu2005.lu/pictures/actualites_photos/05/13ecofin05.jpg
Face off
http://www.ireland.com/newspaper/images/2007/1102/frontpageimage.jpg
Kissy kissy mwahhhh
http://imgslut.com/files/7jlr990rlf4hx8z52qj9.jpg
Bleurgh. Sleep. Laters.
Is that you on the right Jo?
found an older picture of him. it’s amazing what a makeover can’t do
http://alexplorer.net/guitar/text/guitar/gamorrean.jpg
like the new banner, and the wordpress theme name probably struck a chord with you, but it’s not as legible as the old one.outsourcing to romania now? probably only paid a quarter of the going price in true celtic tiger fashion
Theme Name: Mental Disorder
Theme URI: http://teo.esuper.ro
Description: The most vital thing in a man’s life is his mental attitude.
I always wondered what happened to the Spitting Image puppet of Roy hattersly after that show died. Now I know. Dribbly cunt.
This is nice! The comments seem much more roomy with a South-facing aspect.
Obama’s all the handsome I need.
Question. How many politicians do you know of who are bleeding riots to be around? A bit irreverent, charismatic with IQs off the Richter scale so they are armed with skills to save the country/planet and killer looks?
The Doc got shredded for saying much the same about Cowen.
No justice in the world.
p.s. Twenty for Il Ducé – brains, charisma and looks
(that cheque had better not bounce! )
Twenty in that pic you linked I kept trying to figure out if his glasses were that long or if he just really has a big dent in the middle of his face.
Ick.
Brian Cowen is an aesthetic affront in every sense. However, I find it amusing that among the more enthusiastic critics here is someone who, were you to castigate a female politician in similar terms over the course of an entire blog, would suspend her apparent sense of humour and write a voluminous blog whinging about patriarchy and other such bollocks.
Good post Twenty, but i dont think even the suave Zarkosi and his sexy missus could get us out of the hole we are in at the mo..
And sorry but I hate the new format. it looks like a newbie blog (like mine for example)
If it aint broke, dont fix it.
Seriously.
PS is that how you spell Zarkosi (I mean the French fella)
Well spotted Rob!
SAm, give it a day or two. You’ll get used to it.
Or else Twenty will change it again, and we’ll get used to that one instead, etc. etc.
However, I find it amusing that among the more enthusiastic critics here is someone who, were you to castigate a female politician in similar terms over the course of an entire blog, would suspend her apparent sense of humour and write a voluminous blog whinging about patriarchy and other such bollocks.
Did you take lessons in how to be so snide?
“Bleurgh. Sleep. Laters.”
Jesus, Twenty, Please tell me the last S there was a typo.
And Jo, thanks for making me open 3 cnsecutive pics of Brian Cowan on a crowded DART.
Not only do I now look like a perv, I look like a perv with as much taste as Ryvita
No copy of the Metro to keep you busy, Tinman?
The Metro only keeps you busy for about 2 stops, Twenty
Not snide twenty, observant.
How come you were up at 6.57? Are you celebrating the retention of the early houses?
Hence the reasonn Medbh has gone to town when I’ve called Mary Harney a fat cunt, for example.
Try and memorise the TV pages, Tinman. That should help.
Also – if anyone wants you can have a little pic beside your comments. Go to http://www.gravatar.com and you can sign up there.
As an alternative we could always ask the Brits to vote in a real trog as Prime Minister. That way we wouldn’t look so bad. I’m thinking Ricky Tomlinson.
Tinman – Bastardface was grumbling out the back at something. He woke up me, the huge cunt.
Lung – good call. Or Gary Neville.
Surely Ciaran Cannon is the ugliest of them all. I voted No on the recent referendum thingy because of his massive ugly head peering down upon me from lamp-posts telling me to vote yes.
I would not do anything someone that ugly told me to do. uurrrggghhhh.
test
Fail.
:) Gravatar no worky
Ciaran Cannon, good one. When will they learn that we just don’t want gingers in charge of anything?
A friends daughter apparently has a digital sound as her alarm on her mobile phone that says “ginger alert”, “ginger alert”
actually twenty, the fact that she doesn’t go to town over it (and if you read my comment I referred to an entire blog, not a throwaway line) is in some ways, worse. It’s either cowardice on this blog or fake moral outrage on hers. That’s my contention.
I’ll get my coat……
‘You might call me petty’.
First time round, I read this as you might call me ‘pretty’.
Pretty boy.
You would call me pretty too. Pretty boy lover.
Rob – cowardice, fake, any other insults you want to get in before the morning really starts?
Maybe Bono will run for public office…look how much he’s done for Africa.
Rob, being bitchy about someone’s looks has got fuck all to do with feminism. Medbh does not write posts expressing moral outrage at people, whether male or female, being described as ugly.
You’re full of ignorant shit.
Quite right.
Right and pretty.
It’s an irresistible combination.
Like bovril on toast.
Bertie must be loving this. He gets out, everything goes up the swanny. Jammy cunt.
Plus he was very ugly too although not as ugly as cowen.
Pictures of contributors ? The horror, the horror.
Ugliest person ever – Peter Beardlsey
Beardsley for prime minister…
“ginger alert”, “ginger alert”
heh
Check out Davie Dodds ex Rangers footballer on Wikipedia, now he’s a candidate. We used to sing at football matches “Davie Dodds the Elephant man” how cruel we were as youths.
Picture this – Brian Cowen and Gordon Brown with Ginger Barnets and pubes at a spencer tunnick ort installation, blue with the cold…..Can you see it…There, now even Mary the Minge looks appealing.
Good Morning…..
Oi! Leave the gingers out of it, jealous fops.
bovril – a guinness shite in a jar. vile.
FMC – Do you have a soul?
Dessiegee – that has to be in the top 5% of contributins to this site, ever.
Any advance on Neil Kinnock ?
Don’t be silly Dessiegee, of course not.
How’s about Robin Cook’s beard or a bleary eyed Charles Kennedy
Bertie’s son in law, whasisname… it’ll be just like the Lemass Haughey thing all over again.
Nice layout. A small font’s always a good choice in a recession.
To me the font is bigger than the old design.
alt+scrolly thing changes font size anyway.
there’s gotta be one handsome politician… Luke Ming Flanagan?
scrolly thing ?
Commenting font is courier 7 or 8, at a guess. But like B’dum B’dum says you can probably change it. I’m liking his Ming suggestion, he looks like you Twenty, only younger. Got the beard thing going on.
For me, looks like courier six
Talking about sexing up politics, I somehow stumbled on this link on the web.
WARNING – Contains a disturbing Image – Not work compatible
She looks great!
Do you mean the font when you’re typing your comment or the actually comments themselves?
B’dum B’dum – ALT+SCrolly thing – Can you be more specific please, my failing eyesight is now failing faster since I started reading this blog this morning – The font is Way too small for my poor eyes…
I’ve nothing to say today.
Nobody’s listening anyway, HM
Apart from me.
Twenty – Both the reading and the comments – I reckon i’m seeing about a 6 or 7 size font. It looks like you’ve taken youre original page and condensed it to half the size. I have a quarter page blank on both left and right hand side of the page.
It’s actually giving me a furrowd brow and a headache – codeine anyone??
Dessie – what browser/OS are you using?
scrolly thing on the mouse!
I’m on Vista/IE Twenty – if you care.
And it’s small for you, Maggot?
Thaks mate – that worked wonderfully.
Sadly though it doesn’t enlarge the sexy Harney picture
I’ve just looked at it with IE6 on Windows and it seems fine to me.
No longer smal thanks to the wonderful B’dum Bdum!
I think you should take him out for dinner.
Any more saucie Harney pics Dessiegee ?
Don’t encourage him, please.
I think I may have a fever as I found her attractive.
I’m using WIndows XP professional Service Pack 2 with Internet Explorer 7.0.
scrolly thing on the mouse! is that the wheelie thingy in the middle of the mouse.
1st sentence make me sound like a technical wizard. 2nd one more accurately portrays me as the true techno tard that i am. Help!!!
I think it’s all small too.
Alt + scrolly thing does nothing for me!
Does it work in bed?
The wheely thing worked for me
Width of the page and font size is a bit small. Having taken a quick look at the Mental Disorder theme, you should be able to change it all in the style.css and adjust the “width” values so it uses up more of the screen, and change whatever fonts sizes there too.
That’s if you could be arsed listening to us moany cunts…
for anyone vaguely interested, following is link to current stylesheet for the site. font sizes in pixels, not points, hence funny font sizing. must get a life.
http://twentymajor.net/wp-content/themes/mental_disorder/style.css
Whoops it was Control and wheely thing worked for me Jo
Surely 12px is big enough for everyone though, no?
An achingly cute joke for you all this morning – someone’s four year old, on seeing his new cousin being fed for the first time:
‘What bees give milk?’…… He lifts his top to reveal his bare chest and cries ‘Boo-bees!!!!’
Sorry Maggot, no more – my stomach is still churning after the last one.
If you like that sort of thing there is always Sachs hotel Nightclub here in Dublin on a Friday or Saturday Night. I would’nt say they specilise in nights out for the older fuller figured woman but the place is always chocca with fat chicks….You’ll need all your wriggling skills to get past them to the bar. .
Ah, control and scroll does the trick.
What’s the longest longest has anyone ever had a headache for, and what did they do about it?
usually only get headaches when i stop drinking, so just have to keep supping away
uncle had a headache for 3 years. what he did to get rid of it was die, because the headache was a tumour.
Twenty, try .9em instead of 12px. That’s what I use on my site and it’s nice and legible. Dont ask me what the difference between px and em is tho…
Don’t you have to change all the font sizes to that .em thing then though?
Back to the Gary Neville, Peter Beardsly thing.
Sorry but it’s Luke Chadwick hands down.
http://sport.defined.de/img/20040611_luke_chadwick.jpg
Control & Scroll Rocks….
Jo, a couple of years ago I kept getting really bad headaches that painkillers or nothing would help. Doctors said they could’nt find anything wrong with me. Finally one day I snapped at work and told my horrible cunt of a boss to go and fuck himself and I walked out the door. Headaches disappeared and have’nt had a problem since.
Is there somebody or something in your life stressing you out?
Ha, that’s a good point. Maybe, maybe not. My CSS seems to have em and px sporadically dotted through it, so it’s probably okay. From what I gather, em is better to use because it scales to the display, rather than just being a pixel value.
It’s better, have you been fiddling with it? It was as small as the time/date info on comments.
No mouse here, so no scrolly/wheelie thingy.
“What’s the longest longest has anyone ever had a headache for, and what did they do about it?”
In my case I just broke it off with her and that seemed to work.
My ex-wife had a headache for the 9 mmonths we were married .
Hmm, ask a man a question…
Dessieg, I think you may be right there. Good story.
Just changed it to 0.9em
Does it look any different?
“the difference between px and em is tho”
px is pixel measurement, as in digital imaging. Screen/resolution is measured in pixels, isn’t it? Em is an old print measure, allows the same space to be given letters that would otherwise be a different size… I think.
I don’t know Twenty. But I already can’t quite remember what the old one looked like, so I wouldn’t worry about it
As long as you’re here, we’ll be ok :)
“Does it look any different?”
Yes, better… although I perfer a serif font myself. What I’m typing in the comment box is serif (Times/Roman?) but what appears is sans-serif.
I like a roundy font, me.
hah, too kind Jo.
I think I can change the comment form – or that may be a browser issue, Conan.
Worry not, it’s legible and it’s working!
“Just changed it to 0.9em
Does it look any different?”
Does my font look big in this?
weird – ctrl and wheel works everywhere but this site for me – yahoo, peurile’s page, etc but not here.
Jo… in a proper answer to your question. Drink more water, headache could be dehydration? Or get some fresh air.
It’s Gluaistean, SG, he’s concentrating really hard, and preventing it from working.
Is the font smaller Twenty or just far away?
HM, not after, two weeks? It’s a sinus thing (hopefully, as opposed to a brain tumour). I had exactly the same thing when I was pregnant, so I thought it was hormonal.
I took the same remedy that fixed it then, on monday, the homoeopath said give it three days. We’ll see. Doctor if not, I’ve only one more dose in my packet of paracetamol… don’t want anti biotics though :(
solpasinus Jo, from the makers of solpadeine…only in chemists though..
The paracetamol works fine Sam, but I want it cured, not just pain killed.
And Jo if your into Homeopathy, you really should watch this video..
Homeopathy
Seing as we’re on a techi roll with the ALT+SCroll thingy. How do we get an image to appear beside our names like Twenty & Dan. The word “AVATAR” is jumping out of my head as I type but dont know what it means
That control and scroll thing is dead handy. Sorry If I seemed critical of the new layout, but its very white, when I logged on last night I thought I had died and had gone to some kind of heaven.. But the enlarged font helped, maybe i’m gettin old..
At least you have the decency not to class me as a Non-Smoking blog any more.
Fair play to ya Twenty.
And the font is smaller. Or I’m bigger?
My mother was a homoeopath, Sam, it generally works for me and my children. I’ve taken antibiotics once in my life, when I was four, my daughter never, in five years. Accepting the theory does take a leap of faith, I’ll grant you that.
Dessie – go to http://www.gravatar.com, sign up, then when you leave the email address you signed up with gravatar in the email bit here it’ll show your picture.
Dessiegee: Sign up at gravatar.com, upload your picture and it’ll appear on any website that supports them.
I might make a non-smoking category for you, Grandad. Or pipe smoking. But you might get lonely in there on your own what with Peig not being a blogger an’ all.
Soon be kit kat time!
Peig did have a blog back in the 30′s. But no one had the Internet so she quit.
testing the gravatar thingy – here goes
Nah – I’ll try again after lunch sometime, maybe
She was truly a trailblazer, Grandad.
Jo, Definitely agree that too many antibiotics are bad, any GP will tell you that, but without them a simple infection could kill…
Is that what you call someone who sets fire to thatched roofs?
And my fecking gravatar doesn’t work either!
You’re using the same email address in the email field as you used to sign up with Gravatar?
Jo, i get sinus pain now and then but not so much since i QUIT smoking woo hoo. Flexonase spray helps prevent it if you remember to take it. Also eating raw chilli clears out your nasals. So you Mam was scared of gays?
“Soon be kit kat time!”
Bring it on! I’m eating a Twirl, bit girlie but hey who cares.
I dont know what my gravatar is at the moment.
Gravawhatsit test…
…and again…
I think you’ve crashed them, Twenty
I see it, Conan.
What’s with the classical names and pics for online tags?
Is there a manual I’ve failed to read, I wonder?
Sam, no-ones suggesting we NEVER use antibiotics.
Getting back to the Handsome thing. I was going to run for Taoiseach but I got arrested….. because I was Tooooo Sexy!
Smaller font and lots of white space.
Egad Twenty! You’ve become the nouvelle cuisine of the blogsphere.
Great way of getting comments, Twenty – getting people to test their gravatars!
NOW. Do you think I’m handsome enough to be Taoiseach?
gravatar test…
Grandad we love you!
You’d make a fine Taoiseach in the true sense of the word.
bugger
this time…
i used a homeopathic thingy one time. had trouble sleeping for a while a few years back. was it called sepia? did the business after a few days.
i don’t believe or not believe. just tried it and it worked.
We need to give Noel Dempsey a sexy haircut.
Jesus guys, I spend one morning at a meeting and I come back to sixty commments about font sizes!
Monkey, maggot, J5, someone please say something dirty…
testing gravatar bollocks
And gravatars
which don’t work the cunting things
They seem to work for everyone else.
“Jesus guys, I spend one morning at a meeting and I come back to sixty commments about font sizes!”
I usually spend all morning at meetings talking about font sizes.
And here’s something dirty for you…. Down the back of my cooker.
Fucking hell, I was only looking down the back of mine the other. How does stuff that size get down there without you knowing?
last attempt…
“How does stuff that size get down there without you knowing?”
Wasn’t that size when it down there, norra mean?
I’ve just downgraded my image from a PG rating to a G rating. Also I think the site takes 10 to 15 minutes to kick in and then all previous posts will have the image
I’ll Nail it yet…..
Got to admit the technical nature of all this is leaving me a bit cold – font sizes for fuck’s sake? Mixed feelings about having an avatar too.
That said I’ll be gutted if it didn’t work.
WooHoo!!!!
Tinman – Just for you….
A man is lying in bed with his wife when she rolls over and says, “Say something dirty to me.”
He replies, “The Dishes.”
Or
A Priest & a rabbi are driving past a schoolyard & the priest says,”fancy screwing an 9yr old boy?”
The rabbi replies,”outta what?”
Yeah…… Gravatar Works – G Rating and a 20 minute wait
I think it’s funny when people say things like “This is my wife of nine years”.
Another fucking attempt
nine is ninty in married years
OK, once more all this testing must make Twenty feel like a Beagle in the L’oreal factory
Or my car going back AGAIN to the nct
Thanks, DG.
Cool Avatar, too (there’s a sentence I never thought I’d ever, ever say).
I have a really good one – not too sure about using it though – may cause offense….
Liz O Donnell is well fit.
Give her one vote any time.
Missed the dust up yesterday.
Mary Harney is a lap cat of the patriarchy so she’s fair game. I’m not blind. She’s a big tub of goo.
With all the scrutiny that women in politics receive for their appearance, it’s nice to see someone point out that the dudes are often unattractive.
HelloTEST!
fat cock sacker still smokes cigars in his bar.
dessiegay are you still waiting for me with an open asshole at eddie rocketts?
I just looked at myself in the mirror. Got to say, I am so damn handsome. You know it’s probably illegal to look this good!