Judges

What hilarious bastards judges are. When they’re not handing down suspended sentences to rapists, child abusers and kiddie porn lovers, they’re calling the inhabitants of entire county ‘thick’.

Seriously, what a fucking old bastard he is. You’d never catch me engaging in those kind of lazy stereotypes.

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54 Responses to Judges

  1. Tinman18 says:

    But he said it was never meant to be offensive.

    He obviously thought the thick fuckers from Tyrone wouldn’t understand it.

  2. Twenty Major says:

    It’d be great if they really did get stuck in.

    “Well obviously this man didn’t pay his debts, he’s from Cavan. Ten years! No parole!”

  3. Twenty Major says:

    “Your honour, how can you be sure this is the man? You can’t direct the jury like that”

    “The guilty man was heard singing beautifully and dancing with impeccable rhythm. It had to have been this particular negro”.

  4. Dessiegee says:

    The girl gets wrongly prosocuted and the judge accuses her of being thick – how thick is that

  5. Dessiegee says:

    The guilty man was heard singing beautifully and dancing with impeccable rhythm. It had to have been this particular negro”.
    Twenty – is this a quote from the current R Kelly case

  6. Twenty Major says:

    “Your honour, this man has a cast iron alibi for the night in question. He could not have committed this atrocity”.

    “He’s from Limerick. Take him down”.

  7. Twenty Major says:

    Dessie – heh, but unfortunately R allegedly combined the singing and dancing with the raping and sodomising of a teenager.

    Which means he’ll probably get off.

  8. Tinman18 says:

    This type of stereotype would enliven all public life.

    “The Minister for Justice announced today that 200 more Gardai would be posted to Limerick to “sort out the mad bastards down there”.

    “The Min Of Soc Welfare announced further increases in the Old Age Pension, saying “otherwise the fuckers will be on to Joe Duffy again.”

    “The Finance Minister has cut the dole, saying “the lazy shits would only spend it on cider anyway”

  9. So he’s an offensive, narrow minded ignoramus, who won’t accept sterling from a desperate punter and would love to blow the head off anyone who tried to rob him.

    Always wondered why judges and taxi drivers got on so well together.

  10. he had a fucking point

  11. Holemaster says:

    He meant to say people from Fermanagh.

    A lot of arrogant Judges in this country though. I really question the integrity of some of them, especially around the border where fuel smugglers strangely never get heavy fines or sentences handed down. Odd that isn’t it? Wonder if there’s any bails of cash being dropped at their back doors?

    Of course there fucking is.

  12. SuperGrover says:

    I used to like Judge from Wanderley Wagon. I had a badge with him on it.

  13. Puerile Pish says:

    Judge Pickles in the UK once gave a paist a lenient sentence because the woman deserved to be raped.

    In his defence he was in favour of legalising cannabis

  14. Louis Cipher says:

    This story reminds me of a joke.

    Q: What do you call a judge with no testicles?

    A: Justice Mickey.

  15. Puerile Pish says:

    I wonder how he would describe those cunts from Louth?

  16. Tinman18 says:

    Probably as “those cunts from Louth”

  17. When he was “apologising” the judge said “I have nothing but regard for the people of Tyrone”.

    Bloody hell – what kind of an apology is that? He doesn’t specify low or high regard – he merely notes their existence. He should be made to apologise for that apology.

  18. Peadar says:

    haha well spotted PCB. The people of Tyrone exist

  19. Tinman18 says:

    That was all mistyping by the court reporter – he said “I care nothing for the retarded people of Tyrone”

  20. Puerile Pish says:

    I actually met a person from Tyrone on the DART on my way to Croker on Sunday. I can confirm he was indeed thick, seemed nice enough but definitely thick.

  21. Loco Lobo says:

    Anyone who kills a burglar can’t be all bad.

  22. Peadar says:

    Your very definite there alright PP. And was he long?
    I thought it was just Morgor and MB who were like that.

  23. Puerile Pish says:

    Peader to quote the old school yard rhyme: “long and thin goes too far in, short and thick just does the trick”

  24. Puerile Pish says:

    You’ll be supporting United tonight then Peader?

  25. Rob says:

    …just back from the states and I read your blog;

    Now maybe it is the jet lag, or just plain old tiredness but let me get this straight..

    Someone said that Norn Ironers are a bit dim

    Yes

    And

    What’s the problem?

  26. Tinman18 says:

    Have a look at my comment No 8, & then look at RTE’s news, coz apparently Brian Cowen used the word “fuckers” in the Dail this afternoon.

    Didn’t know he read this blog, but I’d like to point out that all of the commenst so far refer to Tyrone, and not in any way to Offaly.

  27. porridge says:

    obviously cowen wasn’t referring to fine gael. would have used the word cunts instead.

  28. Jo says:

    Ahhhh, Rob, wait for the four nights of jolly midnight waking to follow, I wish you well… though you were on the east coast, so mabe they won’t be so bad. Yaaawn.

    Is R Kelly the ‘I believe I can fly’ guy? And he raped and sodomised a teenager? Now there’s a nasty little irony.

  29. Jo says:

    heh. ‘fuckers’ in the Dáil. No better place for them.

  30. Peadar says:

    You’ll be supporting United tonight
    then Peader?

    It’s a difficult one. Is there anyway they could both lose? Although I suppose I hate united that small bit more than chelsea.

    And this is an old one but sure what the heck –
    If you put a long condom on a long prick and a short condom on a short prick, what do you put on a thick prick?
    A Man united Jersey or in this thread maybe Tyrone

  31. B says:

    R Kelly is no longer the “I Believe I Can fly” guy, he’s the “Trapped in the Closet” guy.

    and it was a 14 year old to be exact.

  32. maggot says:

    I lived in Tyrone for 10 years – the People from there are indeed a bit dim.

  33. Monkey Balls says:

    I’ve never been to Tyrone, but I find myself agreeing with maggot. If they allowed him to live amongst them for 10 years, they are indeed dim.

  34. Northside Langer says:

    It was wrong even if its true.

    On another sstory…. just finished watching thematch, Tevez is a fucking psycho, has he ever killed anyone?

  35. Puerile Pish says:

    John Terry is a clown hehehe

  36. morgor the fan says:

    wow what a game.

    the skill was amazing. and the guy with the hair, he played so well.

  37. Puerile Pish says:

    Morgor you are acting gay again

  38. Eoghan says:

    Niiice. Lot of things remind of Withnail quotes tonight:

    Danny: So there’s this judge sitting there sitting in a cape like fucking Batman with this really rather far out looking hat…
    Withnail: A wig.
    Danny: No man, this was more like a long white hat. So he looks at the coal man and says “What’s all this? This is a court, man. This ain’t fancy dress” and the coal man looks at him and says “You think you look normal, your honour?”. Cunt give him two years.

  39. bug says:

    yup, biffo wanted no.2 to get onto the health / welfare top dogs and ‘sort them fuckers out’ so he’d be gettin less grief. Don’t embarass yourself pp, jt is a legend. I hear you tinman, a bit of straight talking and this country would be far better off.

    ‘No you’re not getting an extra 8%, you do shag all and that’s all you’ll ever do. I could outsource your job like that’.

  40. Monkey Balls says:

    Wow, just back from the pub after watching the match.
    That guy with the hair….

    What?

    What do you mean, Morgor already said that?

    -Fuck!

  41. MartyBanana says:

    My personal theory about why judges are so nice to child molesters:

    They are setting a precedent so that when they are found out to be kiddy fiddlers themselves, their sentencing judge will say something like “The standard sentence for your particular heinous crime seems to be a slap on the wrist and a pint of Guinness. Off you go then.”

    Sly bastards.

  42. Justice Owen World says:

    Objection! The above statement is totally false, and misleading. The normal procedure in such a case is that the child is given a slap on the wrist and a packet of hard-boiled sweets!

    It’s against the law to give Guinness to an 8yr. old, no matter what he does in return.

    Get your facts right in future MartyBanana, before you go posting your scurrilious comments.

  43. The Jury in the Above Case says:

    Can we just interject at this point to say that the victim in the above case is being portayed as the criminal, instead of the other way ’round?

    Carry on!

  44. Puerile Pish says:

    Do they not still lynch gays in Waterford?

  45. they do, but most waterford people get homesick and vomit if they leave their farm for more than twenty minutes so generally it’s ok.

  46. Puerile Pish says:

    So have you brought a little bit of home with you to Dublin? A sheep and a turnip perhaps?

  47. A small tanker of slurry and a wheelbarrow of dirt.
    (I sleep in the wheelbarrow)

  48. Puerile Pish says:

    And the slurry?

  49. The smell helps me sleep.

  50. and wards of intruders.

  51. more of this please… I love county stereotypes, and they are usually true!

  52. JERSEY says:

    “Yeah, well, there’s a mirror in the toilet if you want to go in there and talk to them.” – Brian Cowen responding to Martin McGuinness stating “We’ll have to consult the [IRA] army council on this” to certain proposals made during the peace talks concerning Northern Ireland. Source wikipedia.

    Sounds like a top man to me

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