If you had to…
Posted in Blog by Twenty Major on April 29th, 2008
…to save your own life, would you drink a cup of someone’s spit, a cup of their blood or a cup of their piss?
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© 2004-2008 Twenty Major - Still smoking in Dublin bars. All Rights Reserved.
Twenty Major - Still smoking in Dublin bars is an Irish blog.
Totally. Next question…
April 29th, 2008 at 2:21 pm
I would have a cocktail of all three …. again
April 29th, 2008 at 2:22 pm
1
Sure would. I would even read Phoenix again. Heh, hee.
April 29th, 2008 at 2:22 pm
2
Spit without a doubt.
Much easier to swallow in one go, as it’d probably be all stuck together. (coagulated blood notwithstanding)
April 29th, 2008 at 2:31 pm
3
Completely depends on the person.
Do i know them? Are they a junkie? Is the blood in the form of delicious black pudding?
April 29th, 2008 at 2:32 pm
4
Thank you for taking the question seriously, Lung.
April 29th, 2008 at 2:33 pm
5
If the blood was in the form of black pudding I think I’d drink the spit!
April 29th, 2008 at 2:41 pm
6
I like that you’re presenting us with a choice of three fluids.
Would you do it to save theirs?
April 29th, 2008 at 2:43 pm
7
I might be with you there, Fred.
April 29th, 2008 at 2:44 pm
8
Black Pudding = Satan’s Cock
A cup full of spit or piss?
Just let me die
April 29th, 2008 at 2:45 pm
9
Depends on the person & whether they have hepatitis, AIDS, galloping knobrot etc…
April 29th, 2008 at 2:49 pm
10
You forgot jizz..
April 29th, 2008 at 2:50 pm
11
And earwax..
April 29th, 2008 at 2:50 pm
12
Black Pudding = Satan’s Cock
No need for racism, rob! :)
April 29th, 2008 at 2:51 pm
13
Who could forget jizz and earwax?
April 29th, 2008 at 2:51 pm
14
FF, I think you’re thinking, black cock = Satan’s pudding.
April 29th, 2008 at 2:52 pm
15
Dear God, Jo, what have we done to you?
April 29th, 2008 at 2:54 pm
16
I’d go for the piss if it was that of a teetotal vegan healthfreak who drinks 2 litres of water a day and therefore has clear, insipid piss.
If it’s some bulmers-swilling ulcered alky’s frothy, foamy, dense dark-yellow wazz I might just have to go for….
death!
April 29th, 2008 at 2:55 pm
17
I’ve drink piss before so I’d probably have to take that option. It wasn’t that bad actually. No worse than a pint of Budweiser.
April 29th, 2008 at 3:02 pm
18
Really? No-one likes black pudding?
Think I’d go for the blood. Don’t fancy drinking a waste product or a secretion. Do fancy drinking that protein rich goodness.
(Obviously only if it’s clean blood.
April 29th, 2008 at 3:03 pm
19
I am prepared to donate all three to the winner of your choice Twenty
April 29th, 2008 at 3:13 pm
20
the cup of piss might be the best bet, especially , if the donor had been on a Jameson bender the previous night
April 29th, 2008 at 3:16 pm
21
sick fuck
April 29th, 2008 at 3:18 pm
22
I’ll have the blood thanks
April 29th, 2008 at 3:25 pm
23
It wasn’t that bad, Tinman? The black pudding/racism one seemed sort of obvious to me… :)
April 29th, 2008 at 3:34 pm
24
piss or spit.
Piss is sterile so might be the best bet.
And it tends to smell like sugar puffs anyway.
April 29th, 2008 at 3:36 pm
25
That’ll be the diabetes Morgor.
April 29th, 2008 at 3:39 pm
26
My roomie at campus is crazy about those squirting porn ladies, I guess he’d chose C, fukin freak.. I’d rather drink blood, this ain’t so bad, just awful taste of irony in it. Of course, if this blood isn’t from HIV positive..
April 29th, 2008 at 3:41 pm
27
The awful taste of irony, awful indeed!
I don’t think you can contract HIV from drinking it, it needs to go directly into your blood stream.
Could be wrong though.
April 29th, 2008 at 3:46 pm
28
you filthy bastard you’ve ruined my long weekend
April 29th, 2008 at 3:46 pm
29
Oh yeah, woman cum, lovely.
April 29th, 2008 at 3:47 pm
30
diabetes?
you got me freaked out there looking up symptoms.
I’ll put “check if I’m diabetic.” on my list of things to get fixed when I go to the doctor.
April 29th, 2008 at 3:47 pm
31
Not to worry. Am sure the GP will sort you out. Pretty sure that sugary wee is one of the things that underpins the whole diabetes thing though.
Or it could be a tumour.
Or a gipsy curse.
April 29th, 2008 at 3:51 pm
32
not sugary, sugar puffs.
But you’re right, its probably just a tumour.
April 29th, 2008 at 3:53 pm
33
Aren’t sugar puffs sugary? Haven’t had em in ages, and don’t really like nestle stuff anyway, so if i’m wrong that’s why. it’s a reason, not an excuse.
April 29th, 2008 at 3:55 pm
34
I was going to say I’d go for the blood so long as it was from a person that I knew, but then I decided that sounded inherently evil. So I am going for spit. And I hope the bastard who donates the cup of spit has a mouth as dry as the sahara and gets tonsilities from having no spit left. YEAH
April 29th, 2008 at 4:10 pm
35
If Sugar Puffs are sugary, then what the fuck is the Honey Monster doing on my box?
April 29th, 2008 at 4:11 pm
36
Lying to you.
April 29th, 2008 at 4:12 pm
37
Thank you RN.
Back into the cupboard with you, Mr. Box of Sugar Puffs. -For another 12 years!
Can anyone else smell piss?
April 29th, 2008 at 4:18 pm
38
Women cum?
huh?
April 29th, 2008 at 4:19 pm
39
Is the someone who’s fluids we’ve to choose between the same someone who’s threatening our life? If it is, opt for the spit, coz by the time he has managed to fill an entire cup with spit the A-Team will have arrived to rescue you.
April 29th, 2008 at 4:27 pm
40
Yes Johnny5, women cum.
And when they do, they do it in style.
(I’m not 100% convinced that it’s not piss meself. Who cares, it’s fucking great fun. Ruins the bed eventually, but it’s worth it.)
I have videos that I promised never to show to anyone.
I’m never going to show them to anyone, so don’t ask.
April 29th, 2008 at 4:32 pm
41
i know a young fella who will drink a pint of his mate’s piss with very little provocation when he’s been drinking. Fucking disgusting and it makes you think he might not be averse to the spoonful of jizz despite his manly football playing ways. He’s a ginger cunt too which kind of makes it sicker.
April 29th, 2008 at 4:50 pm
42
I’d go for the piss.
April 29th, 2008 at 4:59 pm
43
There is nothing wrong with being ginger..
…oh who am I fucking kidding!
April 29th, 2008 at 5:03 pm
44
Harp Lager ? It’s Piss.
April 29th, 2008 at 5:03 pm
45
why do you ask, Twenty?
April 29th, 2008 at 5:09 pm
46
Just curious.
April 29th, 2008 at 5:09 pm
47
I would drink, lick, suck, fuck, or eat anything to keep alive.
Any other questions, Twenty?
April 29th, 2008 at 5:17 pm
48
You forgot to include watery shite!
April 29th, 2008 at 5:19 pm
49
Seeing as deep throat kissing involves saliva exchange, no big deal. (Tony Curtis once credited it for keeping him young.)
I notice you omitted jizz from the original question, since in reality it is probably the most commonly consumed body fluid, judging from half a million porn videos. (And it doesn’t seem as if anyone’s life depends on it either.)
April 29th, 2008 at 5:25 pm
50
Ah, what a dilemma! I think you should have one of these a week Twenty, and in answer to your question, I’d have to say the wee myself. Perhaps the easiest to swallow…like drinking a berocca in the morning I suppose
April 29th, 2008 at 6:09 pm
51
fair enough.
April 29th, 2008 at 6:11 pm
52
love the site, its now linked to mine
http://frankyx.multiply.com
April 29th, 2008 at 6:51 pm
53
Whoever your captor is here is evil enough to threaten your life unless you drink one of a disgusting selection of fluids, yet touchingly you believe that he will also be gentleman enough to stick by the agreement if you comply.
I’m thinking that’s when he’ll produce a naked Mary Harney with the words “Ok, challenge number 2…”
April 29th, 2008 at 7:21 pm
54
blood
April 29th, 2008 at 7:37 pm
55
spit is the one that wont have AIDs in it or any of the really nasty diseases isn’t it?
but really i’d just let them die.
April 29th, 2008 at 7:39 pm
56
depends on the person but really what kind scenario would demand it?!
at a push i’d go for the pint of piss, but only if i could alternative with gulps of whiskey
jo, if ye had a mouth cut or a stomach ulcer, you could be at risk of contracting hiv from contaminated blood…well according to Mr.Sowadsky ye can
http://www.thebody.com/Forums/AIDS/SafeSex/Archive/TransmissionNon/Q8633.html
April 29th, 2008 at 7:41 pm
57
:) Tinman.
I didn’t realise it was an evil captor, I thought it was more of a deal with god.
Did anyone read The Life of Pi? It’s a survival story about a hindu boy stuck out on the pacific - thinks he’s too vegetarian to eat meat to live, then survival, animal brain kicks in and htere’s a description of him ripping open a sea turtle and drinking its hot blood ravenously.
I’d be crap at survival, I’d be dead in an hour. I don’t think Feral Jo would manifest herself. I’d be the eaten one, I think.
April 29th, 2008 at 7:42 pm
58
I think you’d have to drink like a gallon of spit to get aids… I seem to remember that image. but that’s contradicting my point about not getting aids from drinking blood. So I don’t know. B, you’re meant to be saving your own life, aren’t you?
April 29th, 2008 at 7:47 pm
59
cant catch aids from spit people… Only from blood, or semen…
April 29th, 2008 at 8:12 pm
60
I’d ask for a gobbet of rotting flesh
April 29th, 2008 at 8:41 pm
61
Does nobody like black pudding? I don’t like the stuff we get here but the Spanish equivalent is yummy. It’s yummy til I remember what it’s made from.
I wouldn’t drink someone else spit, piss or blood. Yuck. I’d distract them with something shiny and have a beer instead.
April 29th, 2008 at 9:04 pm
62
Yeah, piss is sterile, so that’d be my choice. It’s almost impossible to drink blood without puking.
The most disgusting one is spit though.
April 29th, 2008 at 9:37 pm
63
you could get laid at the same time! It would be the freakiest sex!
April 29th, 2008 at 10:14 pm
64
Am I alone in wondering how Matt knows that it is almost impossible to drink blood without puking.
Perhaps removing the tampon before going down, might help, string, throat, gag reflex etc
April 29th, 2008 at 10:20 pm
65
jesus rob, that’s fairly depraved!
April 29th, 2008 at 10:43 pm
66
I was merely suggesting a solution…
April 29th, 2008 at 10:45 pm
67
funny though
April 29th, 2008 at 10:47 pm
68
Blood..or piss…saliva is just eww…but then again so is blood..or piss… and so on.
Spose i’d do any of them to save me skin, but if i had to eat some cheese id be dead :)
April 29th, 2008 at 11:45 pm
69
How is spit more disgusting than blood or wee? It’s tasteless, colourless… that’s just odd.
Rob, where did that come from?? Maybe Matt’s a shrinking vampire. More likely he watched Fight Club.
I remember it being suggested that squeamish vampires should carry a skewer and a straw.
I read an Erica Jong story about period sex once. It wasn’t yukky, just messy.
April 30th, 2008 at 12:02 am
70
When I was 16 or 17 my boyfriend cut his finger open on a broken bottle at a punk show. He got a cup of ice to stick it in and it filled with blood. Let’s say 6-8 ounces.
I drank it.
I know, I know.
Silly.
April 30th, 2008 at 1:08 am
71
You can’t beat a nice cuppa shit
April 30th, 2008 at 2:19 am
72
Medbh - holy shit. What was iced blood like?
April 30th, 2008 at 8:45 am
73
What time is the I’m glad Man United made it through to the Champions Laegue final post coming?
April 30th, 2008 at 9:09 am
74
Two girls, one cup? Look it up…
April 30th, 2008 at 9:10 am
75
What time is the I’m glad Man United made it through to the Champions Laegue final post coming?
How about never?
April 30th, 2008 at 9:18 am
76
At least you would get the Liverpool fans like Peadar to comment but it would probably exclude the girls. Maybe to include the girlies you can add the add a relevant question like “Would you shag a soccer player and if so who”. Nervous ahead of tonight’s game?
April 30th, 2008 at 9:31 am
77
I have no vested interest in tonight’s game or last night’s game. Frankly, the final is going to be one of those ‘Do you want to eat a plate of poo or a plate of sick’ moments.
April 30th, 2008 at 9:36 am
78
Although it would be lovely to see Paul Scholes finally play in a final.
And score an own goal, the little ginger cunt.
April 30th, 2008 at 9:48 am
79
Man U are jammy fucking bastards. Kicked off the field again. Ah well, it’ll be all the more pleasurable when the pool beat them in the final.
Whickey face would give any thing to win europe again but it ain’t going to happe
April 30th, 2008 at 11:02 am
80
You don’t want to look up two girls, one cup. I did by accident once. The allure of the gross out. I could live without having seen that, I must admit.
April 30th, 2008 at 11:06 am
81
And another thing, the next cunt that tells me Ronaldo is the best player in the world is going to get a kick in the nuts. He was totally anonymous over the two legs
April 30th, 2008 at 11:07 am
82
How big is the cup?
April 30th, 2008 at 1:54 pm
83
Twenty it tasted very metallic or like a copper penny. People were freaking the fuck out at the show, let me tell you.
He was a very sweet boy, my Vince.
April 30th, 2008 at 2:34 pm
84
Vince, you say?
April 30th, 2008 at 2:36 pm
85
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Good one, Twenty.
April 30th, 2008 at 5:28 pm
86
I was licking out a prostitute once and a piece of carrot fell out of her pussy. I was confused at first but carried on with my task. Next, another piece of carrot and a couple of peas fell out of her pussy so I said, “Whats with all the veg falling out of your pussy? - are you sick? No, says she, the last punter was, though……
May 1st, 2008 at 9:53 am
87
I’ll have to tell that joke to my Ma.
May 2nd, 2008 at 8:58 am
88