Legal matters
Posted on | April 22, 2008 | 27 Comments
Dear Judge,
I am writing to you on behalf of two of my constituents whose son is currently on trial for some petty crime or other.
I would like to provide you with some background information on his family. They are good people, well respected and liked by the local community and they make a significant contribution to the quality of life in this area. Both his parents are practising catholics, members of the ISPCA, the mother is an active member of the Irish Countrywomen’s Association and the father organises charity golf classics and long puck contests for the young children of the area.
They are well known for their hospitality and ne’er a stranger has passed their door without a cup of tea and a corned beef sandwich being handed to them. This one time a passing motorist broke down near their house and not only did they give him a bed for the night they allowed him to share theirs so as to keep him warm.
While they fully accept that their son has done wrong (whatever it might be, I’m not so up on the details myself) they have asked me, as their representative, to speak on their behalf. I feel I have a duty to them as constituents and potential voters for me and my party to do so.
As you can see the son comes from what you might call ‘good stock’ and I would urge you to consider that when passing sentence in this particular case.
I can assure you that Mr and Mrs Hitler would be eternally grateful to you for your help.
yours etc,
Mary Hinge, Labour TD (and full time idiot).
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27 Responses to “Legal matters”
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April 22nd, 2008 @ 9:07 am
Mr & Mrs H needn’t worry, because Brian Lenihan is now going to allow over-70′s on juries. When they come to reach their verdict four of them will have forgotten what the case was about, one will have pissed himself and the one who sat quietly at the end of the row for the whole trial will turn out to have been dead for the last 3 days.
April 22nd, 2008 @ 9:16 am
I thought that by now, getting a letter of reference from a fucking politician, would be a bad thing…
April 22nd, 2008 @ 9:27 am
Y’know it’s funny, but if the victim in the rape trial you refer to hadn’t complained, and the letter had been successful in getting that bastard’s sentence reduced, every politician in their constituency would’ve sent the parents a letter saying it was them who wrote it.
April 22nd, 2008 @ 9:37 am
When I say refer, you know I really mean allude to
April 22nd, 2008 @ 9:48 am
dear mr. judge,
my son is allowed to stay home from prison because he’s feeling a bit off.
yours..
April 22nd, 2008 @ 9:51 am
You’re very lucky you have a legal advisor MB.
I know this is completely off topic, as there has been no mention of anyone from cork in this post so far, but I met Kathleen Lynch before and she was very nice.
And her 3 daughters are fairly tasty.
April 22nd, 2008 @ 9:58 am
found a picture … follow my website link….
April 22nd, 2008 @ 10:15 am
I was listening to Kathleen Lynch talking about the unrelated topic on the news yesterday, and in fairness to her, she’s apologised and she does seem to have got it.
Hitler’s adoptive father was an abusive psycho. Nobody would be attesting to his character! It’s fairly easy to track what went wrong with him. Alice Miller, Poisonous Pedagogy, brilliant book.
April 22nd, 2008 @ 10:28 am
Poor old Jeffrey Archer should have tried writing to the Judge who was about to sentence his constituent, that is Jeffrey Archer.
April 22nd, 2008 @ 10:32 am
Morgor – the mother is a fine looking woman in her own right- in which case she’s obviously the victim, like Bertie, of a Media inspired witch hunt.
April 22nd, 2008 @ 10:58 am
When a lawyer was asked if this kind of reference actually worked he said
“it most definitely doesn’t and in some cases the judge will react adversely to such statements”
Hitler had ADD so please don’y pick on him
April 22nd, 2008 @ 11:03 am
Her daughters would get the raped in an instant. It’s sweet though because Mrs Lynch is a good friend of my mothers so she’ll sort the judge out for me.
April 22nd, 2008 @ 11:04 am
Jesus, PP. I’m not trying to excuse Hitler. I’m just saying there’s both nature and nurture in it, and the psychology of it makes for interesting reading. That’s all.
April 22nd, 2008 @ 11:23 am
Twenty did you steal Bocks last Rolo or something?
April 22nd, 2008 @ 11:56 am
And did you know that Gooebels had bulimia and Himmler would have been a nicer person if only his genocidal tendencies had been harnessed constructively.
I want to be a Social Worker, I will get the prerequisite qualifications, a wooly beard, a pipe, a collection of folk music and I will drive a 2CV.
April 22nd, 2008 @ 12:05 pm
It’s the swish car that’s the main attraction.
Peadar – no idea. He must be in his flowers about something.
April 22nd, 2008 @ 12:52 pm
“They are well known for their hospitality and ne’er a stranger has passed their door without a cup of tea and a corned beef sandwich being handed to them”
So basically they dragged people in off the street and force fed them Tea and Proccessed Meat sandwiches?? The Sick Bastards..
April 22nd, 2008 @ 2:00 pm
I’m going to change my name to Adolf Pol Pot.
April 22nd, 2008 @ 2:07 pm
Cool, you can hang out with my friend Jeffrey Dahmer Bundy Mugabe
April 22nd, 2008 @ 2:35 pm
Idi Amin dada Ahern or Brendan Ogle – are they welcome
April 22nd, 2008 @ 4:26 pm
DUBLIN CENTRAL WITH HUGE FUCKIN’ GRASS SLIDE
Major I know this has nothing to do with the thread but please raise this issue soon.
This is a development by the same culture fucking cunts that build the Taj-Mahole in Dundrum. It’s a bloody spent fest ugg boot orgy for the very heart of our city. These Hummer driving demolitionist fuckbags have to be stopped from fucking us up the arse by sticking a fucking roof over half the city and robbing of it’s village names: “Dundrum Centre, Dublin Central”, FUCK OFF and gimme that back you cunts.
April 22nd, 2008 @ 4:50 pm
“As you can see the son comes from what you might call ‘good stock’”
What is he, a carrot?
April 22nd, 2008 @ 5:11 pm
Some kind of vegetable, no question!
April 22nd, 2008 @ 5:35 pm
You know – I’m going to get slated for this – but she wrote about the parents not on the son. Just saying the standing of the parents and the type of people they are. She acted as a witness.
fuck – gets to the point you can’t say anything now.
Cunt and all as he was, what fucking harm can a letter do, its not like she even asked for him to be released or anything.
April 22nd, 2008 @ 7:04 pm
hitler is an inspiration to failures everywhere, in ten years you can reverse your fortunes from failed artist on the street to most powerful leader in the world.
April 22nd, 2008 @ 7:26 pm
I don’t think the fool actually meant any harm or realised how utterly stupid it was.
she’s shown herself unfit of public office, and needs to fuck right off asap (unless she has already, cuz I’m a bit slow myself)
don’t make matters worse by hanging around.
She stuck the boot in on two of her constituents, just not acceptable.
April 22nd, 2008 @ 9:14 pm
”they are well known for their hospitality and ne’er a stranger has passed their door without a cup of tea and a corned beef sandwich being handed to them”
Probably gave them Kimberly biscuits as well.
Sick fucks…