John Prescott

Posted on | April 21, 2008 | 69 Comments

I had to check the date on the newspaper on Sunday when I read about John Prescott suffering from bulimia. It wasn’t April Fools. Then it kind of made sense to me.

I bet he sicked it up then ate it straight back down again, the gluttonous cunt.

I eagerly await the Mary Harney/Anorexia exposé.

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69 Responses to “John Prescott”

  1. Conan Drumm
    April 21st, 2008 @ 1:44 pm

    Bulimics can be overweight, obese even. They’re often bingers. If Mary Harney were to suffer from an eating disorder it would more likely be bulimia rather than anorexia.

  2. And I don't really care yer know
    April 21st, 2008 @ 1:45 pm

    I odn’t really care ,…

  3. Twenty Major
    April 21st, 2008 @ 1:45 pm

    She’s a Mr Kiplingoholic.

  4. Puerile Pish
    April 21st, 2008 @ 1:49 pm

    Fuck off with excuses, big boned, glandular, heavy aura, I will acknowledge some eating disorders but not in the case of that chip and gravy swilling behemoth Prescott. He is Northern, probably raised on a diet of lard and dripping fried in batter, the obnoxious cunt.

  5. Puerile Pish
    April 21st, 2008 @ 1:49 pm

    Sorry for the rant…but he is a cunt.

  6. B
    April 21st, 2008 @ 1:50 pm

    prescott’s really disappeared in the last while. it used to be great fun watching him beat up strangers on the street, waving the middle finger back at journalists and whatever else it was he done.

  7. Lou Plic
    April 21st, 2008 @ 1:53 pm

    He boned his secretary at the Xmas party, could you imagine the Odlams involved!!!

  8. dee
    April 21st, 2008 @ 1:59 pm

    ahaha. a bold joke of this genre has been lurking at the back of my head since i heard. well done.

  9. O'Reilly
    April 21st, 2008 @ 1:59 pm

    Two Jags should now be known as two gags.

  10. Conan Drumm
    April 21st, 2008 @ 3:03 pm

    “She’s a Mr Kiplingoholic”

    Agreed, let’s call her Missus Kipling from now on.

    ‘If you can keep your belly when all about you
    Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
    If you can burst yourself when all men doubt you
    But make allowance for their doubting too.
    If you can wait and not hunger by the waiting,
    Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies,
    Or being hated, don’t give way to hating,
    And yet don’t look to food, nor talk too wise:’

    etc., ad nauseam

  11. B
    April 21st, 2008 @ 3:10 pm

    odlums? the flour?

  12. Twenty Major
    April 21st, 2008 @ 3:25 pm

    heh, Conan.

  13. problemchildbride
    April 21st, 2008 @ 3:26 pm

    Lovely, Conan!

    “ad nauseam” – ha!

  14. SuperGrover
    April 21st, 2008 @ 3:49 pm

    odlams? what?

  15. madspoon
    April 21st, 2008 @ 4:27 pm

    Tis funny reading this today as I have a tummy bug and after scoffing down a lovely meal of bangers n mash with egg and peas, on a bed of red sauce yesterday evening, I violently puked it all up about 15 minutes later and as I said to the missus last night I can see a healthy good side to this Bulimea lark.

    All the taste and very few of the calories.

    Starving now though. Still can’t hold anything down :(

  16. SuperGrover
    April 21st, 2008 @ 4:46 pm

    madspooon…
    “bangers n mash with egg and peas, on a bed of red sauce”

    Just hazarding a guess here, but you wouldn’t be a culchie by any chance?

  17. Lou Plic
    April 21st, 2008 @ 5:25 pm

    I’d say his missus is called Brandine

  18. Peadar
    April 21st, 2008 @ 5:35 pm

    I’d say he’s a savage for bacon and cabbage

  19. Peadar
    April 21st, 2008 @ 6:07 pm

    Tis quiet today.
    Monkey must be back in his cage. Maggot has been squashed. Morgor is gone to change his name.
    Twenty and J5 are pouncing around dublin wearing 3/4 length trousers and sun glasses on their heads.
    Cunts one and all.

    I’m going to bed

  20. GOM
    April 21st, 2008 @ 7:06 pm

    Are you referring to this…. http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/health/bulimia-not-the-same-as-being-a-greedy-bastard%2c-say-doctors-20080421887/

    Yes, Mr. Kipling writes exceedingly good poems

  21. morgor the everlasting
    April 21st, 2008 @ 7:12 pm

    I’m a busy cunt nowadays.

    Not so much fannying about time.

    But i’m still here. oh yes.

  22. Xbox4NappyRash
    April 21st, 2008 @ 7:56 pm

    Mary Harney vomited me up, I scurried away to safety before she came back for a second go.
    Pig.

  23. OneForTheRoad
    April 21st, 2008 @ 8:05 pm

    Next week in the Sunday Independent:

    ‘Bertie: It was me kleptomania what done them tings’

  24. maggot
    April 21st, 2008 @ 9:36 pm

    Fuck yourself peadar -nobody else would – I’m here !

  25. maggot
    April 21st, 2008 @ 9:39 pm

    Celia tells all to the Sunday life – Bertie stole my heart ?

  26. Silly Old Sod
    April 21st, 2008 @ 10:20 pm

    Bit harsh there Twenty, speaking as a half-bulemic meself.

    I’ve mastered the binge eating but the chucking up is proving a bit more troublesome…

  27. tommy
    April 21st, 2008 @ 11:08 pm

    As a fat cunt myself,but not so fat as to suffer from chaffing,I’ve often wondered whats the big deal about puking.I’d rather stuff myself,wait a while and then have a big healthy shit. The pleasure is in seeing what I’ve done to all that disgusting food.Bulemics should get with the program.

  28. Bock the Robber
    April 21st, 2008 @ 11:26 pm

    Nice one, Twenty. It would be even funnier if he had bowel cancer.

  29. Twenty Major
    April 21st, 2008 @ 11:30 pm

    No it wouldn’t.

  30. manuel
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 12:36 am

    he’s definitely been doing it wrong………

  31. maggot
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 1:31 am

    P is right. It’s another example of excuse making via medicine or psychobabble. Naughty children ? No, they have ADD. Stupid ? No they have “problems”.

    Greedy Cunt ? No, it’s a medical condition.

    My arse.

  32. Bock the Robber
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 1:37 am

    Yes it would. You could have had a right good laugh at it. Even funnier than bulimia, which is really hysterical.

  33. How Funny Is John Prescott’s Bulimia?–Bock The Robber
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 1:43 am

    [...] it looks like Twenty thinks Bulimia is a fucking [...]

  34. Lorcan the Lion
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 8:46 am

    what has bowel cancer got to do with anything? who is this bock cunt?

  35. Twenty Major
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 9:02 am

    I know you’ve been waiting to have a go, Bock, but I’m a bit disappointed this is the best you can come up with.

  36. Jorge
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 9:29 am

    Bock the Rimjobber more like

  37. Giver O'Shite
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 9:46 am

    Bock the knobgobbler

  38. Organ Donor
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 10:38 am

    Looks like we have some PC Nazi’s on..

  39. Nora
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 10:57 am

    You call Prescott a gluttonous cunt. Various others come in and attempt to out-do you in “funniness” and vomit references. Meanwhile some other intellectual asks, “who is this bock cunt?”
    Does all this have some value? Or does saying cunt every five minutes get a higher ranking on irishblogs.ie? What about “Leave a comment if you like. Or don’t. It’s all the fucking same to me.” I mean, is that “clever” or what? What’s the point exactly? Does it make you feel ‘big’?
    It took far more guts for Prescott to admit what he did than for you to sit there and write “gluttonous cunt” forty times over.
    Now, let’s hear the ‘jokes’ about ‘guts’ etc.

  40. Nora
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 10:59 am

    “Looks like we have some PC Nazi’s on”

    No, it’s called a smidgen of intelligence.

  41. Twenty Major
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 11:04 am

    What exactly is your point, Nora?

  42. Nora
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 11:06 am

    Sorry, I didn’t know you couldn’t read.

  43. Twenty Major
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 11:07 am

    Yes, it’s obvious I struggle with things like that.

  44. Queen of Clean
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 11:37 am

    Play nice children!! Or it’s the naughty, sorry the ADD step for you!

  45. Organ Donor
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 11:37 am

    Nora: I was talking about the 2 intellectuals above my comment..
    But you’re holier than thow attitude intrigues me..

    Whats it like up there on your high horse?

  46. Nora
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 11:56 am

    It’s got nothing to do with “holier than thou”. I’d like to know what’s the point of the post — other than giving a platform to various idiotic comments. Which seems to be its main function. And a platform for a few utterly extraneous uses of “cunt”.

  47. Twenty Major
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 12:03 pm

    …other than giving a platform to various idiotic comments. Which seems to be its main function. And a platform for a few utterly extraneous uses of “cunt”.

    That’s exactly the point.

  48. Organ Donor
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 12:05 pm

    Nora.I think you’ve said Cunt more than most on this page today…oops I did it again..

    Lighten up…

  49. Organ Donor
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 12:07 pm

    Cunty Cunty Cunt….ah shit my tourettes has started…. “HANDICAP”..sorry.”BLOWJOB”..help me!

  50. Puerile Pish
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 12:12 pm

    Nora, your naivete is quite astounding. Mr Prescott is attempting to fit a label on himself to make himself more appealling to the UK electorate. His size is directly attributable to a lifestyle choice. He, the great man of the people, is quite frankly a man of appetites, certainlyin terms of the trappings of wealth aquisition, which include a large ingestion of alcohol and pie. He is a product of a typical “working class” made good scenario which Bertie also capitalised on to gather wealth.

    It is not my place to say it, so apologies to TM in advance, but if you don’t like what is in the blog or post you have the choice to not read it.

  51. Nora
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 12:13 pm

    That’s exactly the point.

    Grand. But I don’t imagine anyone needs a blog to do that. Have at it. It’s your turf, not mine.

  52. Twenty Major
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 12:15 pm

    It’s your turf, not mine.

    Exactly, which leads me to wonder why you fucking bothered in the first place.

  53. Twenty Major
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 12:16 pm

    It is not my place to say it, so apologies to TM in advance, but if you don’t like what is in the blog or post you have the choice to not read it.

    No need to apologise to me for talking sense.

  54. Nora
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 12:16 pm

    Mr Prescott is attempting to fit a label on himself to make himself more appealling

    I take it you’ve spoken with his doctor, then.

    if you don’t like what is in the blog or post you have the choice to not read it.

    It’s my first visit here. I didn’t know what to expect. But I do now. :)

  55. Organ Donor
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 12:22 pm

    Nora: Go on, say Cunt one more time…pleeeeease???

  56. Twenty Major
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 12:32 pm

    You didn’t know what to expect when you came on to someone’s blog and leave the kind of comment you did?

  57. Nora
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 12:42 pm

    Well you did say, “Leave a comment if you like. Or don’t. It’s all the fucking same to me.”

  58. Twenty Major
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 12:46 pm

    And?

  59. Nora
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 12:55 pm

    Figure it out, Twenty. :)

  60. Bock the Robber
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 4:06 pm

    Twenty: You know I’ve been waiting to have a go?

    How did you know that?

    As it happens, I know someone with this illness, and I thought it was worth leaving the fairly mild comment I did, because I’ve seen the consequences it can have on people and their families.

    I don’t mind people calling me a cunt if that’s what passes for discussion.

  61. Twenty Major
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 4:37 pm

    As it happens, I know someone with this illness, and I thought it was worth leaving the fairly mild comment I did, because I’ve seen the consequences it can have on people and their families.

    So what?

    Your comment re: bowel cancer was just ludicrous and taking one part of what I said and making a sweeping generalisation in your blog post elicited reactions just like you’d hoped.

    Which is fine with me, a bit of blog banter is always good.

  62. Peadar
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 4:38 pm

    Everyone enjoys the slagging and piss taking until it hits closer to home. Bullshit!

  63. Bock the Robber
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 4:42 pm

    God forbid we’d ever see a ludicrous statement here, Twenty! Or a sweeping generalisation.

  64. Twenty Major
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 4:45 pm

    God no, especially when there’s those with the memory of elephants hanging about the place.

  65. Bock the Robber
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 4:57 pm

    Not to mention mind-readers.

  66. Twenty Major
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 5:03 pm

    I can bend spoons too.

  67. Ubollix
    April 22nd, 2008 @ 6:34 pm

    Uri Geller – Twenty Major? Really can’t see it. Or else what you really mean to say when you talk about bending is actually …?

    Out of curiousity, what has Bock robbed?

  68. JJR
    April 27th, 2008 @ 11:34 pm

    …many people of their dignity, not to mention his own on occasion.

  69. Hate oilbaron's hirelings
    January 15th, 2009 @ 12:13 am

    It serves him right!

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