Fantasy Kris Kindle
Posted in Blog by Twenty Major on December 21st, 2007
You choose one person, alive or dead.
You choose one present for them, good or bad.
Who do you choose and what do you get them?
I’d get Damien Rice a life-support machine so I could take him off it.
An abacus for Bertie.
December 21st, 2007 at 2:06 pm
Though on second thoughts he’s had enough gifts for one lifetime.
December 21st, 2007 at 2:06 pm
1
I’d get the Spears sisters hysterectomies.
December 21st, 2007 at 2:10 pm
2
A brain transplant for Dubya.
December 21st, 2007 at 2:15 pm
3
I’d get the Spears sisters hysterectomies
haha.
Wouldn’t he have to have a brain first, Grandad?
December 21st, 2007 at 2:18 pm
4
I’d buy you a drink twenty, just sos i could take it off yer and drink it meself …. but its the thought that counts isn’t it?
December 21st, 2007 at 2:23 pm
5
a packet of Barrys teabags for bertie so he wouldn’t have to buy his own tea for a while
December 21st, 2007 at 2:34 pm
6
A big mac for Mary Harney.
December 21st, 2007 at 2:34 pm
7
I think the idea is to get them something they don’t want, Johnny5.
December 21st, 2007 at 2:37 pm
8
Perhaps the word ‘poisonous’ is missing from your comment.
December 21st, 2007 at 2:37 pm
9
Id get the receipts for Bertie and the rest of the cabinets dig outs and give them to the tribunal, then Id get developers,builders,estate agents and VI economists and banish them all to fuc**** spike island with no remission ever and 1 tent between the lot of them. Bastards
December 21st, 2007 at 2:42 pm
10
Maggie Thatcher-A room in the Grand Hotel Brighton (6th floor).
December 21st, 2007 at 2:43 pm
11
One more big mac will kill her, that’s my reasoning.
December 21st, 2007 at 2:50 pm
12
Surely you could save money by just getting her one wafer thin mint.
December 21st, 2007 at 2:52 pm
13
A grain of rice would be even cheaper with the same desired effect.
December 21st, 2007 at 2:55 pm
14
Its christmas. Down with all this hate.
Twenty, go out and buy a D. Rice album and give it
a listen, just for the season thats in it. You might like it.
Careful now
December 21st, 2007 at 3:15 pm
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I would get Peadar his very own firing squad.
Time for pints. Laters.
December 21st, 2007 at 3:19 pm
16
I’d get Stephen Hawking a Nintendo Wii.
December 21st, 2007 at 3:48 pm
17
Cancer to everyone responsible for the mis-diagnosis of any woman or its cover up.
A conscience to Bertie.
Eternal flatulence to all you saps who voted FF.
Life-long dysentry to Barry Egan, Brendan O’Connor, Eoghan Harris and their ilk.
December 21st, 2007 at 3:51 pm
18
I’d get Stephen Hawking a Nintendo Wii. by Pete.
Fuckin brilliant :)
Anthrax parcels for all of Dail Eireann.
December 21st, 2007 at 3:53 pm
19
…..And for Twenty, Five.Gold.Rings. - one for each of your holes.
December 21st, 2007 at 3:57 pm
20
do you reckon the members of the dail are into Anthrax?
I prefer Slayer myself
December 21st, 2007 at 3:58 pm
21
Samantha, I think you’re a genius!
Personally, I’d give a dose of the worst, genital-burning, maddening itchy, weeping, incurable, puss-oozing clap, to the same people as Samantha!
Oh yes, STDs, the gift that keeps on giving!
December 21st, 2007 at 4:57 pm
22
A pair of balls for the pizza delivery man to replace the ones I shot off him for trying to mess with my missus. Except the balls would have to come from an HIV-infected rhesus monkey.
December 21st, 2007 at 4:58 pm
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I would give Nanuk the results of the DNA tests.
December 21st, 2007 at 5:09 pm
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I’d buy Heather McCartney a pogo stick.
And I’d buy myself a video camera.
December 21st, 2007 at 5:33 pm
25
“do you reckon the members of the dail are into Anthrax?
I prefer Slayer myself”
The ghost of Liam Lawlor walks the halls of the Dail singing
“I am the Law”
Mary Harney is a big Death and Cannibal Corpse fan.
December 21st, 2007 at 5:33 pm
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Nah, I’d get Heather McCartney her very own plane.
And a razor for the other leg
December 21st, 2007 at 5:48 pm
27
The ghost of Liam Lawlor walks the halls of the Dail singing
“I am the Law”
haha
I’m off. Happy xmas all you cunts
December 21st, 2007 at 5:53 pm
28
i’d buy katherine thomas chlamydia . . . .
December 21st, 2007 at 6:43 pm
29
I’d buy Mr lardy arse Gore a bike. Hypocritical bastard telling me to curb my emissions. He with his fleet of cars, mansions and traveling everywhere by private jet, the cunt.
December 21st, 2007 at 7:38 pm
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Spot on 20 - Ahern is the cuntish cunt that is currently cunting - but his balls are smashed now - just hope he is around to answer why Jim Mansfield Jnr ‘Dublin’s biggest coke and gear importer’ has been allowed to use Westdon airport as his own private durg route - is it because his daddy - Jim Mansfield senior is in to the lord of the cunts for a few large.
December 21st, 2007 at 8:14 pm
31
Frank Connolly
A trip to Columbia
December 21st, 2007 at 8:27 pm
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I’d have got Saddam some weapons of mass destruction. Could’ve evened things up a bit…
December 21st, 2007 at 8:35 pm
33
Stuart Lobbock, a pair of of water wings, awight?
December 21st, 2007 at 9:29 pm
34
Tom Cruise - a door out of his closet.
December 22nd, 2007 at 5:40 am
35
Ok, this is addictive, plus Yippee is a right charmer…..
Life-long blindness to the RTE scheduling shmucks who think Celebrity Jigs + Reels is acceptable New Years Eve viewing
December 22nd, 2007 at 8:20 am
36
I’d get Fatmammycat that catsuit that Michelle Pfeiffer wore in the batman films.
Then I’d get her to walk about in it for a bit.
real slow
yeah
I bloody would an’ all.
classic
December 22nd, 2007 at 10:21 am
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You are such a slut, Maroon, you slut.
December 22nd, 2007 at 11:15 am
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Internet banking for B-Bertie with voice r-recognition software
December 22nd, 2007 at 11:29 am
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Id like to give myself a new testicle after an unfortunate agricultural accident early on during the year …. shure it makes the levi’s easier to wear
December 22nd, 2007 at 12:20 pm
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I’d get a stripper for Ahmadinejad. And I’d get his wife a book. AND I’d shake her hand.
December 22nd, 2007 at 12:26 pm
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I’d get Gerry Ryan a big mac… and dangle it on a stick just slightly out of his reach. I wouldn’t want to watch though.
December 22nd, 2007 at 12:41 pm
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Get Sir Elton ten lords aleaping.
December 22nd, 2007 at 5:18 pm
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Oh, and I’d get you a pirate costume and a pet owl.
December 22nd, 2007 at 10:04 pm
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and a pet dwarf dolphin
December 22nd, 2007 at 10:22 pm
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I’d get Mother Theresa a facelift.
December 23rd, 2007 at 1:16 am
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a years supply of Nicorette for TM,
It is the time for new Years REsolutions after all..
Happy Christmas
to one and all
December 23rd, 2007 at 4:24 am
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I would give Barry Egan meningitis and some hair dye for that gross looking head of his.
December 23rd, 2007 at 6:31 pm
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I’d get Bertie a reality check if i didn’t think he’d try to cash it.
December 24th, 2007 at 10:24 am
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I’d give Mary Harney a bed in the Mater - public. Then see her shit herself and lose some of that unwanted fat.
December 26th, 2007 at 4:34 pm
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Mr. Bojangles - a new dog.
December 26th, 2007 at 8:56 pm
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