Comments on: Christmas decorations

By: Twenty Major

Twenty Major — Wed, 14 Nov 2007 00:12:36 +0000

I never understood why anyone would buy a present for somebody they didn’t like.

By: Lafsword

Lafsword — Tue, 13 Nov 2007 23:24:16 +0000

I forgot to mention, there is one plus side to all the Christmas shit and thats My wife actively encourages me to drink as this is the only way she can get me to be sociable. So I manage to get through quite a lot of Whiskey in a couple of days.

By: Lafsword

Lafsword — Tue, 13 Nov 2007 23:19:01 +0000

I hate all the shit that attaches itself to Christmas. I hate shopping for presents for cunts I don’t even like, I really hate Henry Street and fucking Arnotts in particular (Mainly because they sponsor Dublin Footballers or as they should be known “CUNTS OF MONUMENTAL PROPORTIONS”, although it is great to see how much money Arnotts continue to waste in this way Sponsoring those skobie cunts as they win nothing each year). Grafton Street is OK except for those fucking beggars – though somebody corrected me on this recently and told me they were “Street Entertainers”, well Fuck off back to your own side of the Liffey then. Christmas shit should start on 20th of Dec and should pack up and fuck off on 26th of Dec each year.

By: Cruddy Bang

Cruddy Bang — Mon, 12 Nov 2007 16:47:05 +0000

I used to think it was too early but as I get poorer each year, I get more tolerant of christmas preperations coming months early. Mainly because I can score some presents and money at christmas and the thought of not eating out of the bins warms me heart. Also, most middle aged people are depressed and have crappy jobs, so if they have something to look forward to like Christmas, 6 weeks before it is actually there, they will be distracted from the awfulness of their lives.

By: Conan Drumm

Conan Drumm — Mon, 12 Nov 2007 14:31:16 +0000

There are now more shopping days ’til Christmas than there used to be.

By: Shebah

Shebah — Mon, 12 Nov 2007 10:54:33 +0000

Christmas…mmmm – roast goose, lotsa wine followed by sloe gin….bad telly, zzzzzzz on the sofa – lovely!

By: Lung the Younger

Lung the Younger — Mon, 12 Nov 2007 10:10:01 +0000

Ah yes, the only time of the year that you’ll see a stupidly dressed fat man shouting ‘Ho, ho. ho!’ and it’s not a rap artist.

By: spannerhead

spannerhead — Mon, 12 Nov 2007 01:15:55 +0000

Hey laughykate, that’s a “Kevin Bloody Wilson” song.

‘ckin funny, too. Here:

Hey Santa claus you cunt! Where’s me fucking bike?

I’ve unwrapped all this other junk and there’s nothing that I like.

I wrote you a fucking letter and I come to see you twice

Ya worn out geriatric fart, you forgot me fucking bike.

If I wanted a pair of bloody thongs, I’d have bloody asked.

And this cowboy suit and ping pong set you can shove right up your arse!

You’ve stuffed me bloody order up, It’s enough to make you spew

And I’m not the only one who’s snakey, Me sisters dirty too!

(female voice)
Hey santa clause you cunt! Where’s me fucking pram?

You promised me you’d bring me one, you remember who I am.

‘Cause I’m the little girl who you made sit right on your hand

I’ll give you fucking ho ho ho, You forgot me fucking pram

(male voice)
Next time I come to see ya, I’m gonna punch you in the guts

And I’ll let your fucking reindeer go and kick Rudolf in the nuts!

You just wait ’till next year, when you go to that store

And me and me little sister, come stomping through the door

And we’ll say, yeah you wait for it,

Hey mums and dads you smell his breath and check his bloodshot eyes

And don’t listen to him boys and girls ’cause he tells fucking lies

He’s just a piss tank and a pervert, and he’s not even very bright

‘Cause the old fucking wanker Forgot me fucking bike.

You wait you old cunt, I’m gonna dob you in

Tell me old man on you, he’s gonna punch your fucking lights out

“I saw mummy sucking santa clause”

By: Mad Dog

Mad Dog — Sun, 11 Nov 2007 22:30:33 +0000

The one redeeming thing about Christmas is drinking Harvey’s Bristol Cream at 9.00am and continuing throughout the day. Mince pies are good too but the turkey is rubbish (eating the same deceased, hormone fattened, tasteless flesh for two weeks is not my idea of fun). I hate Christmas trees shedding needles everywhere and fake ones just look naff. This year all presents will be obtained on Amazon and cards will be of the e-variety (screw the tryanny of sending tree ware in the post). And Santa is a useless fat drunken bastard -I’m still waiting for the digital camera I wrote to him about in 2003…

By: samantha maguire

samantha maguire — Sun, 11 Nov 2007 09:27:08 +0000

Em Twenty, any chance the recent attack was revenge for what you did in Ron’s to that boring shite who mentioned early xmas last year? We love xmas chez maguire, decos etc have been up since Nov 1st. Mr. Maguire enjoys oral sex with a different turkey and pig each day until he makes his decision as to who gets cooked before they’re eaten this year.