Christmas decorations
Posted on | November 10, 2007 | 32 Comments
I see the Christmas decorations are up on Grafton Street and around town.
I have no real problem with that because, when you think about it, there really is only a little over 6 weeks until Christmas Day.
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32 Responses to “Christmas decorations”
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November 10th, 2007 @ 11:12 am
Bah Humbug!
November 10th, 2007 @ 11:18 am
Jayzus, Twenty! You’re getting as bad as the rest of them. It’s early November, for fuck’s sake. Come back to me in five weeks time, and we’ll talk about Christmas.
November 10th, 2007 @ 11:22 am
Been down this road before – http://twentymajor.net/2006/10/20/oh-just-fuck-off/
Que sera, sera.
November 10th, 2007 @ 11:27 am
ah crap. Bugger Christmas. Get stuffed Santa.
November 10th, 2007 @ 11:27 am
will the buke be on sale by christmas ?
November 10th, 2007 @ 11:45 am
Christmas is CRAP!
November 10th, 2007 @ 11:57 am
Where I come from we don’t have to worry about Christmas decorations, at least not the ones they put up in the street because we steal them as soon as they are put up which is kind of pointless because they are those big totally unusable decorations I mean what good is a big plastic Santa with electrical wires hanging out the arse of it?
I’ll let you in on a well known secret though Twenty. Great big plastic Santa’s make great dummies when you dress them up in jeans and a hoodie. Then simply tie it upside down amongst the Christmas lights outside the house and watch every passerby reach for their mobile phone. The emergency services love us…
November 10th, 2007 @ 1:37 pm
If you think of the whole thing as getting ready for the birth of Baby Jesus then it makes a lot more sense. It’s too late now for the abortion, so you might as well pimp up the box room (or Henry Street) and get use to six more weeks of ‘my feet are sore!’ and ‘I need to pee again’ and ‘look at my funny again and I’ll embed these chopsticks in your pupils’.
Or the shopping equivalent.
November 10th, 2007 @ 1:55 pm
Niall OK posted this on his blog:
http://isitchristmas.com/
November 10th, 2007 @ 3:11 pm
My next door neighbours have started putting their’s up today. It is the 10th of November. I shit you not…
November 10th, 2007 @ 4:00 pm
Is it just me or does anybody else think that Christmas is a sneaky fucker.Every year its the same the summer is only eneded and the sneaky bastard is just waiting around that corner,to stress u out and steal your money.Well ill be waiting for u,u fucker.
November 10th, 2007 @ 4:44 pm
“Christmas is CRAP!”
You’re obviously doing it wrong. Christmas is fucking ace. You get to walk around with a can in your hand at 10am and eat crisps all day and no one bats an eyelid.
They should start the fucker even earlier.
November 10th, 2007 @ 4:46 pm
Coloured lights and coniferous trees offend me greatly.
November 10th, 2007 @ 5:00 pm
buying the presents is shit but drinking hot whiskeys as soon as you get up is excellent.
the constant barrage of ads is a real cuntass though
November 10th, 2007 @ 8:03 pm
I cant wait to put up my symbolic pagan icon.
November 10th, 2007 @ 8:35 pm
My husband’s already got a symbolic pagan icon in his breeks so we’ll just be sticking with the usual Christmas tree this year.
November 10th, 2007 @ 9:05 pm
christmas is a load of shite. endless hours of buying presents for people you don’t like who probably won’t appreciate your gift anyway. money is a great way of letting people know how much you care – you’re not important enough for me to spend time or effort on, but i’ll never hear the end of it if you don’t get something, so here’s some cash and i hope you choke on it. in this spirit of xmas honesty, was thinking of setting up my own line of “fuck you” cards for all the important holidays of the year. any interest?
November 10th, 2007 @ 9:40 pm
Will they have glitter on them Porridge?
November 10th, 2007 @ 10:17 pm
Christmas is a time for having a tray of beer under your bed.
November 11th, 2007 @ 1:02 am
Christmas takes the chill out of winter.
November 11th, 2007 @ 2:54 am
Christmas is better when my wife’s family isn’t here. We’re on a three year winning streak at the minute so it’ll be good this year. Unless some of my family decide to visit, then we’re really fucked.
November 11th, 2007 @ 4:39 am
Santa claus you cunt, where’s my fucking bike?
November 11th, 2007 @ 9:27 am
Em Twenty, any chance the recent attack was revenge for what you did in Ron’s to that boring shite who mentioned early xmas last year? We love xmas chez maguire, decos etc have been up since Nov 1st. Mr. Maguire enjoys oral sex with a different turkey and pig each day until he makes his decision as to who gets cooked before they’re eaten this year.
November 11th, 2007 @ 10:30 pm
The one redeeming thing about Christmas is drinking Harvey’s Bristol Cream at 9.00am and continuing throughout the day. Mince pies are good too but the turkey is rubbish (eating the same deceased, hormone fattened, tasteless flesh for two weeks is not my idea of fun). I hate Christmas trees shedding needles everywhere and fake ones just look naff. This year all presents will be obtained on Amazon and cards will be of the e-variety (screw the tryanny of sending tree ware in the post). And Santa is a useless fat drunken bastard -I’m still waiting for the digital camera I wrote to him about in 2003…
November 12th, 2007 @ 1:15 am
Hey laughykate, that’s a “Kevin Bloody Wilson” song.
‘ckin funny, too. Here:
Hey Santa claus you cunt! Where’s me fucking bike?
I’ve unwrapped all this other junk and there’s nothing that I like.
I wrote you a fucking letter and I come to see you twice
Ya worn out geriatric fart, you forgot me fucking bike.
If I wanted a pair of bloody thongs, I’d have bloody asked.
And this cowboy suit and ping pong set you can shove right up your arse!
You’ve stuffed me bloody order up, It’s enough to make you spew
And I’m not the only one who’s snakey, Me sisters dirty too!
(female voice)
Hey santa clause you cunt! Where’s me fucking pram?
You promised me you’d bring me one, you remember who I am.
‘Cause I’m the little girl who you made sit right on your hand
I’ll give you fucking ho ho ho, You forgot me fucking pram
(male voice)
Next time I come to see ya, I’m gonna punch you in the guts
And I’ll let your fucking reindeer go and kick Rudolf in the nuts!
You just wait ’till next year, when you go to that store
And me and me little sister, come stomping through the door
And we’ll say, yeah you wait for it,
Hey mums and dads you smell his breath and check his bloodshot eyes
And don’t listen to him boys and girls ’cause he tells fucking lies
He’s just a piss tank and a pervert, and he’s not even very bright
‘Cause the old fucking wanker Forgot me fucking bike.
You wait you old cunt, I’m gonna dob you in
Tell me old man on you, he’s gonna punch your fucking lights out
“I saw mummy sucking santa clause”
November 12th, 2007 @ 10:10 am
Ah yes, the only time of the year that you’ll see a stupidly dressed fat man shouting ‘Ho, ho. ho!’ and it’s not a rap artist.
November 12th, 2007 @ 10:54 am
Christmas…mmmm – roast goose, lotsa wine followed by sloe gin….bad telly, zzzzzzz on the sofa – lovely!
November 12th, 2007 @ 2:31 pm
There are now more shopping days ’til Christmas than there used to be.
November 12th, 2007 @ 4:47 pm
I used to think it was too early but as I get poorer each year, I get more tolerant of christmas preperations coming months early. Mainly because I can score some presents and money at christmas and the thought of not eating out of the bins warms me heart. Also, most middle aged people are depressed and have crappy jobs, so if they have something to look forward to like Christmas, 6 weeks before it is actually there, they will be distracted from the awfulness of their lives.
November 13th, 2007 @ 11:19 pm
I hate all the shit that attaches itself to Christmas. I hate shopping for presents for cunts I don’t even like, I really hate Henry Street and fucking Arnotts in particular (Mainly because they sponsor Dublin Footballers or as they should be known “CUNTS OF MONUMENTAL PROPORTIONS”, although it is great to see how much money Arnotts continue to waste in this way Sponsoring those skobie cunts as they win nothing each year). Grafton Street is OK except for those fucking beggars – though somebody corrected me on this recently and told me they were “Street Entertainers”, well Fuck off back to your own side of the Liffey then. Christmas shit should start on 20th of Dec and should pack up and fuck off on 26th of Dec each year.
November 13th, 2007 @ 11:24 pm
I forgot to mention, there is one plus side to all the Christmas shit and thats My wife actively encourages me to drink as this is the only way she can get me to be sociable. So I manage to get through quite a lot of Whiskey in a couple of days.
November 14th, 2007 @ 12:12 am
I never understood why anyone would buy a present for somebody they didn’t like.