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October 21st, 2007 at 10:46 pm
So, what do you do for a living?
Oh I’m in the computer industry, and what do you do?
I’m a monkey catcher!
Unbeatable!
Course they dont really go to bars over there! Probally dont want to make monkeys of themselves!!
October 21st, 2007 at 11:32 pm
It would be quite cool to say your dad died fighting off a horde of wild monkeys. Maybe embelish it and say they were robotic apes.
October 21st, 2007 at 11:56 pm
Maybe we could set them on to Katy French, Barry Egan and Brendan O’Connor? Surely the Hindus wouldn’t miond that?
October 21st, 2007 at 11:56 pm
mind…
October 22nd, 2007 at 12:35 am
packs of filthy fuckers
and the monkeys can’t be too clean either
ba-dum-klannngggg
October 22nd, 2007 at 12:44 am
“One approach has been to train bands of larger, more ferocious langur monkeys to go after the smaller groups of Rhesus macaques” – can really see that working out. langurs attack people, train larger, more ferocious baboons to go after smaller langurs… only thing to do is send in charlton heston.
October 22nd, 2007 at 12:50 am
twenty, hope you’ve done some of the work on your book yourself
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/england/devon/3013959.stm
October 22nd, 2007 at 1:04 am
good can we get them here , id love it i would send them all over the shop TD s first ,gardas ,
polish workers , social welfare , 2 fm, , rte, posh wankers with suits the list is endless
October 22nd, 2007 at 1:19 am
Oh, brilliant. Training bigger monkeys to go after the smaller monkeys. Where will it end? Acid spewing blue whales in strategic positions in the Indian Ocean? Can anyone point me back to the door to Real Life? I seem to have fallen into a dimension of irony and stupidity the last few years.
October 22nd, 2007 at 1:23 am
They can bring in a dozen or so leopards that won’t need training to eat monkeys — or Indians either. It will make the cat god happy.
October 22nd, 2007 at 1:36 am
The Langur-monkeys are definitely the answer.
We can supply them.
October 22nd, 2007 at 8:45 am
Anyone need a lift?
October 22nd, 2007 at 8:50 am
Hanuman is a monkey god? I thought he was the Reading goalkeeper? does Steve Coppell know? This is all very confusing.
October 22nd, 2007 at 8:51 am
Even though he changed his name, his address, got married and landed himself a top job, deep down Mowgli knew that King Louie would eventually catch up with him. You can’t outrun the long arm of the apes forever.
October 22nd, 2007 at 9:04 am
Lung..Giggle
Do you think we could borrow a few of those apes for a week and incarcerate them with the ‘celebrity’ inmates on that show?.
I, for one would consider it worth the price of my tv licence to see either Mickey Joe Harte or Victoria Mary Clarke (she’s engaged to Shane McGowan don’t you know) grappling with rabid monkeys.
October 22nd, 2007 at 9:06 am
Where is the Proud Englishman this morning, has he gone back to being British.
We have them Monkeys here in England, I saw one of them driving a car!
October 22nd, 2007 at 9:07 am
he was in Hartlepool
October 22nd, 2007 at 12:12 pm
“Oh, brilliant. Training bigger monkeys to go after the smaller monkeys. Where will it end?”
The telecommunications company I work for has employed large monkeys to keep smaller monkeys off our satellite dishes in our African sites because they disrupt communications. It’s not as far fetched as you think.
Regarding the article:
It’s the start of what will eventually become ‘The Planet of the Apes’!!!
October 22nd, 2007 at 1:27 pm
jack ,go to peckham it all ready is
October 22nd, 2007 at 7:31 pm
Ye couldn’t make it up….
The fact that they’re thinking of bringing in larger monkeys to attack the smaller ones ( ye’d think their primate problems were bad enough) is like a great big monkey-cock shaped cherry on the top of that story
October 23rd, 2007 at 9:22 am
A horde of wild monkeys has invaded the Irish capital, Dublin. A quick response from the authorities ensured public safety by coralling the Monkeys into a house on Kildare street. Soon after, internecene strife broke out between the monkeys and they are now throwing shit at each other from opposite sides of the house. In order to prevent a further attack on the public, the authorities have agreed to pay the monkeys up to 200k per year if they promise to stay within the confines of the house and keep their shit from spilling out into the streets.
October 23rd, 2007 at 9:30 am
hah
October 23rd, 2007 at 12:51 pm
heh…as good an excuse as ever for relaxing gun laws…feckin monkeys (I’m from the monkey plagued city)