Barcamp? What’s it all about?
The techy end of the Irish blogosphere is all excited about an event in Dublin tomorrow called ‘Barcamp’. I checked it out and was slightly disappointed to discover it has nothing to do with bars and I don’t see any mention of tents at all. The Ginger Avenger, Tom Raftery, will be talking about building a carbon neutral data centre. Look Tom, the weather for the last couple of weeks has been excellent, we don’t need anyone fucking it up by trying to stop global warming.
I’d set up a solid fuel powered data centre.
“Lads, the servers are running slow!”
“Not a problem. Get some more fossil fuels into that incinerator, and while we’re at it, let’s burn plastic cartons.”
“Mmmmmm, toxic smoke.”
Far be it for me to criticise but this event is not for me. It’s inspired me though. I might set up my own. I shall call it ‘Beercamp’ and people can spend all day drinking beer and telling stories about the great things beer has made them do like come home and go for a wee on a bedside table when you think you’re in the bathroom.
I might get a special guest speaker and I shall call him ‘Bergkamp’ and he can talk about all the great goals he scored while drinking beer. I mean, of course, he’d drink beer while telling the stories because it was very rare to see him with a can of Dutch Gold during a World Cup.
Of course we’d need to cover the ‘camp’ side of things as well so Graham Norton would be introduced as the host for the day. Then promptly shot in the face.
Who’s in?
April 20th, 2007 at 9:06 am
So, let me get this straight, we get free beer and the chance to chat all day in a camp with Graeme Norton and Denis Bergkamp who will regale us with tales of how good they are at dribbling and shooting their loads. Can we not stick them on the fire with all the ging gang gooley stuff?
April 20th, 2007 at 9:17 am
Where did it say “free”?
April 20th, 2007 at 9:22 am
Tremendous idea! Move it North and have it before the 30th so we can all somke. Sounds like a NAMBLA meeting but without the boys and peodaphilia. I’m available to work this event in my roll as the world’s greatest waiter. I thank you in advance.
April 20th, 2007 at 9:40 am
Surely the waiters will bring free beer round with them as we watch Norton spitting gently in the embers
April 20th, 2007 at 9:44 am
Who’s in?
Don’t you mean “who’s out?”
April 20th, 2007 at 9:46 am
I’m in for seventeen pints. Once in Jersey, after an afternoon and evening session I was thrown out of a club for constantly dropping my glass an falling about. Wanting to get back in to be with my mates , I tried to get in through a window which turned out to be the womens toilet, I got halfways in , then the bouncers were pulling me by the ankles and some girls were pulling me by the arms , the heavies won and I got a few clatters. The things drink will drive you to.
April 20th, 2007 at 9:53 am
Shame on you kev. I think you should be barred from the beercamp. This will be for folk music, real ale, and nobbly bits only. Won’t it?
April 20th, 2007 at 10:13 am
You have to wait for Bergkamp. He doesn’t like flying so he has to use a ferry. Or get him drugged up and fly him over like they used to do with Mr T.
Will there be any belgium beers? No beercamp without Duvel, Chimey or Hoegaarden at least.
And dutch gold is unknown in the Netherlands. Closes they have is Oranjeboom and that’s the most shite tasting beer there is. And yes, Oranje = Orange so that’s why they don’t sell it in Ireland under that name.
April 20th, 2007 at 10:36 am
There is a already a ‘Beer Camp.’ An Irish guy — Mike Munnelly — set it up in Boston eight years ago and it sells out to thousands of people twice a year. And each year it gets larger.
See their website:
http://beersummit.com/customer/home.php
April 20th, 2007 at 10:43 am
If Bergkamp isn’t available, you could always invite Frank Rijkaard over to give a chat about how he is going to make his team greener by replacing his carbon dioxide producing defenders with oxygen producing trees. You’d have to call the session Barcampnou though.
April 20th, 2007 at 10:45 am
*Buddum tish*
I think a mighty Douglas Fir in place of Ologuer would be a big improvement for Barcelona.
April 20th, 2007 at 11:24 am
While we’re at can I suggest inviting Keith Duffy and throwing him on the fire as well. I’d like to swill a well chilled Chimay Red while listening to Duffy shouting “are ya nervous” as he roasts.
On another note, dancing girls are always a bonus as well. Liven things up.
April 20th, 2007 at 12:29 pm
Can I bring Julian Whathisname from UTV too? I’d say he’d burn well.
And after we’ve feasted, we can use Kate Moss and the Beckham Bitch as toothpicks.
April 20th, 2007 at 12:39 pm
Ach we did BeerCamp in Cork in the pub after BarCampIreland1 last September.
Bloody brilliant Belgian Beer pub where Mulley started JaegerBombs and I went home after two Hoegaardens. Hard core baby.
April 20th, 2007 at 1:48 pm
Im back in Ireland from the 12th of May if you can postpone it until then count me in. If not I will just go down to the Hizballah Camp and drink beer with and talk shite with all the shiites.
April 20th, 2007 at 1:55 pm
Alright MacDara I’ll see if I can find someone from Hamas to go boozing with tonight. I like my beer served sunni side up.
April 20th, 2007 at 2:21 pm
Well, another brilliant excuse to widen my carbon footprint with one of those ridiculously cheap Ryanair flights from the UK to Ireland…
April 20th, 2007 at 4:12 pm
as everyone gone to a party and not told me ….
April 20th, 2007 at 4:24 pm
It’s all a cheap publicity stunt for Twenty’s new book …
wait for it …
Mein Kamp!
April 20th, 2007 at 5:07 pm
You’ve started something now Twenty, you’re going to have to follow up with Beercamp.
Can I throw Brian Kennedy on the fire, while listening to Alternative Ulster on the jukebox?
April 20th, 2007 at 5:37 pm
That’s an excellent idea Twenty, we can use the toxic smoke to keep the PFY’s awake!
April 21st, 2007 at 2:19 pm
This one time, at barcamp…………….
*(Musta been those CORN flakes i had for breakfast)
::groan::