Paddy’s day and off-licences
Posted on | March 13, 2007 | 24 Comments
What exactly is the point of the Gardai asking off-licences to open late on St Patrick’s Day to prevent people getting pissed too early?
If someone wants to get pissed early on Saturday won’t they just buy their booze on Friday? They’re also going to patrol outside some off-licences to ensure alcohol is not served to drunk people, people engaging in anti-social behaviour or to miners. Or even minors. In the old days did they have minor miners?
Anyway, the kids’ll just stop people and ask them to go into the off-licence for them and there’s always someone who’ll do it.
I suppose it’s obvious when someone goes in and asks for 7 naggins of the cheapest vodka you have and then asks to pay for them separately.
Paddy’s day being a Saturday this year means everyone will be less up for it. For a lot of people the drinking all day is only really special when you’re spending a day in the pub when you should be in work. Stinking Pete’s going to call in sick on Tuesday and go on the piss on his own but that has a lot to do with him being a lonely cunt.
I’m rather indifferent to the whole thing this year but Lucky Luciano is bringing a friend of his over from Italy. His name is Paolo and he looks like Jesus apparently. It’s said he once killed a passing mule with one punch to the face. It could be interesting to have him around.
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24 Responses to “Paddy’s day and off-licences”
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March 13th, 2007 @ 9:43 am
My son was born on Paddy’s day. He’s 5 soon and if I see him outside an off-licence I’ll beat him and grab his drink – the mite
March 13th, 2007 @ 9:46 am
Quite right. He’s too young to appreciate the creature, Sid.
March 13th, 2007 @ 10:03 am
Agreed. He can only have adrink when he can nick it intelligently.
March 13th, 2007 @ 10:16 am
Its a shame your not up for it this year twenty as I was looking forward to you blogging from the pub again. I was even going to bring me own and makes stupid comments as the drink went down as opposed to just making stupid comments.
Of course with the Ball later in the Day I must stay semi sober so that I can get Introduce the Irish ambassador to the art of getting pissed.
March 13th, 2007 @ 10:40 am
Paddy’s Day is shite. However, this year my family OWN the pub, so it’s got potential to be… marginally less shite than last year?
March 13th, 2007 @ 10:46 am
If they don’t want people to get pissed, why do they put on bloody parades and call it a carnival?
Surely the only way to enjoy these things is pissed as a fart!
March 13th, 2007 @ 11:01 am
Why don’t they just change the religious slant of the whole affair. Make it a Muslim festival and there’d be no drinking or make it Prebyterian and there be no craic. Bish, bash, bosh the day is saved. Taaa daaaa!!
March 13th, 2007 @ 11:23 am
reverse psychology, twenty. when the off licences and pubs are closed (easter, christmas, tooth fairy day etc.) every one wants to go, so the garda thinking (yeah, i know) is that keeping them open all day means people won’t feel like going until it’s too late, they’re pissed and won’t get served, and then have to ask the sober kids hanging around outside to buy them drink. the garda mind is not to be messed with.
March 13th, 2007 @ 11:26 am
“If they don’t want people to get pissed, why do they put on bloody parades and call it a carnival?
Surely the only way to enjoy these things is pissed as a fart!”
The only way to enjoy carnivals is if they’re good. Not shite like the Dublin Paddy’s day parade.
At least there’s sport. Ireland are playing for the 6 nations title and Crossmaglen are in the Football final in Croker. Hooray
March 13th, 2007 @ 11:32 am
The Swearing Lady is right – Paddy’s Day is shite, unless you happen to enjoy artificially expensive Guinness and a throng of shitfaced amateurs invading your pub. I’m wondering how much the bastard owner of my local pub is going to inflate the price of Guinness this Paddy’s Day. On the bright side, one advantage of having my paycheck direct deposited to the pub is that they don’t hit me for the cover charge at the door.
March 13th, 2007 @ 12:05 pm
So the offy will be sold out on Friday evening. Better get my drinks on time.
This year will be my first propper Paddy’s day. Because I always had to work on Paddy’s day. it’s the toll you pay for working for your native country in Ireland. Probably end up in the pub around the corner, or when the weather is nice down in Phoenix park. Though I might just want to have a look at the parade. Can’t leave ireland after a couple of years and never seen the paddy’s parade in Dublin. It’s one of those once in your lifetime experiences.
March 13th, 2007 @ 12:22 pm
Sid Trotter as I live and breathe. I thought you were dead.
March 13th, 2007 @ 12:28 pm
Dale de Moin Man
I can confirm that I breathe and am alive though I did hold my breath for a long, long time.
March 13th, 2007 @ 12:29 pm
I’m just relieved the Shelbourne will be open this year…its our way of saying thank you to ourselves having stood in the cold watching the parade with two little boys who lost interest after the third float.
March 13th, 2007 @ 2:06 pm
However, this year my family OWN the pub, so it’s got potential to be… marginally less shite than last year?
Vintners. Jesus.
March 13th, 2007 @ 2:47 pm
In the 70s, I and my friends would drop acid and spend the day in the park, then have to go to that crappy wine bar that was in O’Connell Street, that was the only one in Dublin, cos the pubs closed at 10.30!
Oh, the good old days!
March 13th, 2007 @ 2:56 pm
Jaysus
What did I start!!!!
No, not the drunken paddy aspect of it, but the drunken plastic paddy aspect, now the drunken polish plastic paddy, and those pollacks can drink!!!.
Niall.
PS Irish Americans are like bulls with Tits, useless.
March 13th, 2007 @ 3:05 pm
If you dont like Paddy’s day then just stay at home and scratch your hole like any other saturday. If its shite its because you cant think of doing anything , And so just pretend its just another day. On the other hand if you grasp it by the balls you can have a good day and remember you would all be working on Monday if it wasn’t for St Patrick.
March 13th, 2007 @ 3:17 pm
I’m with MacDara.Cheers Paddy!I’ll be sure and make the most of that extra day.
March 13th, 2007 @ 3:46 pm
Why oh why do peoples go binging on Paddy’s Day? It has to be the most boring day of the year! (Did I just answer my own question there?)
It’s hilarious to see the little farts hanging around S’macs with their can of Johnny Jump Up or some other shite.
March 13th, 2007 @ 5:47 pm
Couldn’t agree with you more, people will booze no matter what, in fact if you put a ban on drinking on paddies day, it will give people more incentive to booze (if such a thing was possible)
March 13th, 2007 @ 6:31 pm
Your all fuckers, I have to work. So stop whinging and just get pissed, slag tourists, get sick, eat a kebab and sleep in your doorways.
March 13th, 2007 @ 6:58 pm
I love the mule reference. If you’re a member or a horse you’d get it. Are you Twenty? Are you? If not, then thanks for an unintentional laugh anyway.
March 14th, 2007 @ 11:53 pm
I think yer all some silly shower of shites. Sure shoot some shots, & slip in to some slut.Sorted.
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