So Apple have released the iPhone, which will be a phone that runs the Mac OS, is an iPod, can play videos, browse the web and make you a cup of tea in the morning. Then there’s iTV which means you get a box or something and then you can put the box between your computer and your TV and watch all the stuff on your computer on your TV.
They really are an innovative company. I have a few suggestions for them though.
iTrim: Nose hair, the bane of all our lives, but how often have you wanted to trim your nose hair while downloading the latest releases from the iTunes music store while sending spreadsheets and project files to colleagues who can view you via your webcam? The iTrim does all that and more. Using state of the art touch sensitive technology the device trims your nose hair then sends the vibrations wireless to your computer who uses the beats per minute of the trimmer to select the perfect song to listen to.
iTwat: Are you a young Hollywood starlet? Can’t get out of a car because the paparazzi are taking shots of your exposed minge? The iTwat uses holographic technology to make it look like you’re actually wearing knickers rendering their photos useless but still allowing you to get fingered by complete strangers while standing at the bar.
iRon: Do you want to chat with your friends while ensuring your favourite shirt is beautifully pressed and without creases? The iRon is a steam iron with a built in chat client that connects to MSN, AOL, Yahoo, Gmail, IRC and the Home Shopping Network. iRoning has never been so much fun!
iPog: The pogs faze died out after being hugely popular in the mid 90s but watch it grow again as the iPog takes schoolyards by storm. Each one contains a 2GB memory card, enough to store 1000 songs in MP3 format, and features the face of Steve Jobs. Mmmmm, Steve Jobs.
iRocketlauncher: Designed specifically for US soldiers in Iraq who have little to do except wait for civilians insurgents to drive past their post. They can now watch episodes of their favourite TV shows such as M*A*S*H, WKRP in Cincinnati and Manimal. It has a built in motion sensor so the headphones cut out and a warning is sounded in anyone Arabic comes within 1000 yards.
iCan’tbelieveit’snotbutter: It’s a low fat, healthy spread for your sandwiches but it can also play movies, songs and … oh, fuck it. You know the rest.
Hello. Very good job. This is a nice story. Thx!