Monthly Archives: January 2007

I was listening to Karen Coleman interview Richard Dawkins on the radio on Sunday. I could have done a better job. I’d have at least asked a different question. The interview went something like this.

Coleman: So what about XYZ, Richard Dawkins?

Dawkins: Well, this is what I think about XYZ and while I’m at it here’s a bit of ABC too to make my point more clear.

Coleman: All well and good, Richard Dawkins (she insisted on saying his full name like she was scolding him. Richard Dawkins, get in for your tea at once!), but what about ABC?

Dawkins: Well, if you’d been listening you’d have heard me explain ABC but look, no harm, and here’s some DEF to keep you going.

Coleman: We have a text from a listener, Richard Dawkins, who asks what about XYZ?

Dawkins: Ok, I’ll explain this for the 5th time…

Fairly fucking crappy, you have to say. Coleman’s stance seemed to be based around ideas such as the beauty of nature couldn’t have come through evolution and sure wouldn’t it make more sense if God had created them.

Now, to me it makes much more sense that intricate patterns and colours and flowers and plants came about through evolution because, no matter how patient he was, God is not going to sit there and colour in the 12,400 different types of ferns that exist all over the world and waste his time making 500,000 different kinds of insects.

He’d just get a basic model and lash loads of them out then spend the rest of his time playing video games or smoking the best grass he could make. Maybe that’s what he did but some of them were retarded and deformed and stuff and they interbred to create new species. God-powered evolution.

Dawkins is an interesting speaker though but his trenchant belief in atheism with a total unwillingness to accept the slight possibility that there’s an omnipotent white bearded old cunt up there makes him just as bad as the rest of them. Personally I’m open to all possibilities. Look, I’ve seen Dirty Dave, the stinkingest fucker I know, get his end away with women so if that can happen then the idea of a God in heaven is not so ludicrous.

I did like that episode of South Park recently where in the future all religion had been wiped out and, because of Dawkins, atheism was the accepted creed. That didn’t stop the United Atheist Alliance, the Atheist Federation and some other group fighting it out over which brand of atheism was the best.

Stinking Pete is the most religious of all us. He had a near death experience a few years back after he got hit with a golf ball while flying his kite on the beach out near Donabate. He was in a coma for three days and he swears he did the whole going into the light thing and he saw his dear departed Mum and so on.

We never told him that it was us in the hospital room. When the doctors weren’t around we’d shine torches into his eyes and say in really deep voices ‘Come into the light, Stinking Pete’ and then we’d hold a photo of his mother over his eyes. We really fucking tried to get him to go into the light but he said he felt something calling him back.

It was probably Dirty Dave, the soppy cunt.