Fallout the window, you twats.

Posted in Old blogger by Twenty Major on April 28th, 2006

I didn’t watch that Fallout program that was on RTE a few days ago because I’m still trying to recover from the trauma of The Day After and Threads which managed to make Sheffield look even more bleak than it actually is. Planet Potato had a look at it though and he concluded that it was pretty shite.

Then today I’m trawling around looking for some news having just recovered from the upset stomach I had yesterday and I read this:

RTE’s documentary-style drama, screened this week, used BBC-style news reports and amateur video footage from mobile phones to portray panic on Dublin’s streets as terrified residents scrambled to get out of the city.

The national broadcaster later said it logged 30 calls from viewers who believed the disaster was actually happening.

Jesus wept! This is 2006 and 30 people thought that there was panic and mayhem because of meltdown at Sellafield. Unbelievable. Maybe the world was a more innocent place when Orson Wells had people running the streets with the War of the Worlds but there’s just no excuse for that now.

I mean, even if there was a nuclear disaster at Sellafield why the fuck would you ring RTE?

“Hello, RTE. How can I help you?”

“Hello, I’m lookin’ at dis disastoh on de telly, reet, and I’m, like, wondering wha’ de sketch is an’ all dat.”

“Yes, it seems as if we’re all going to die from radiation poisoning and suffer hideous mutations with a slight chance of acid rain from the west.”

“Nice one, bud. Cheers.”

*click*

“He-yar, Antionette, we’re bleedin’ fucked, so we are. Let’s go rob Footlocker.”

The funniest thing is that Environment Minister Dick Roche has been complaining that the program portrayed Irish people in a bad light. He said “It was a slur on the Irish people. They were suggesting there would be riots on the streets of Dublin. We have a very sophisticated society here in Ireland.”

Excuse me whilst I wipe away the tears of mirth. We’re so sophisticated that 30 people rang up the TV station to find out if the drama series was real and the Minister might want to cast his mind back a few months when the thoughts of a few protestants marching down O’Connell Street caused major riots. Imagine what a fucking nuclear disaster would do.

He should be given the job of Minister for talking hysterical shite and those people that phoned up need to be put down, the fucking gobshites.