Questions

Posted in Old blogger by Twenty Major on December 16th, 2005

Stinking Pete is always asking funny questions. Yesterday he was full of them.

“Twenty, are Mormons real?”

“Yes, Stinking Pete, they all live in Salt Lake City and they believe a man called Joseph Smith wrote the book of Mormon and was a prophet. They eat palm trees and believe that if you smile all the time you go to heaven.”

“They’re gas so they are. And why can’t you get Golliwogs in the shops anymore?”

“Believe it or not Pete some people thought Golliwogs were racist because they were representative of black people and if children continued to play with Golliwogs they’d want a black person as a pet when they grew up. You know, the way people of our generation all did.”

“My Golliwog died. I forgot to feed it. If a giant meteor hit the earth first do you think Madonna would survive?”

“Yes, I’m sure she would. Scientists have proved that even in the event of nuclear war only two creaures on the earth would survive. Madonna and the cockroach. As yet there is no sure way of killing her.”

“If a Hippophant was the cross between a hippo and an elephant what would you call the animal you’d get it you crossed a monkey and a mongoose?”

“Well, Pete, it would obviously be the Mong… - erm - the Monk…er…fuck….”