Que sera, sera…

by Twenty Major on September 1st, 2005

…whatever will be, will be. I’m going to Italy, que sera, sera.

Yes, I know I told you I wasn’t allowed back after my last trip there but needs must. Lucky Luciano needs some help in his home town and he asked me and Jimmy to come along and give him a hand.

Turns out Lucky’s wife’s ex-boyfriend has been ringing her up at all times of the night, sending her text messages and telling her he’s going to come to Ireland to steal her away from our new chum. For those of you who don’t know Lucky is a compassionate assassin. He only kills people who really deserve it.

This cunt really deserves it.

I told Lucky that I had some history with Italy and might not be able to get into the country on my passport. He made a phonecall, told me to get some pictures done and within 24 hours I had an Italian passport all of my own. Apparently I was born in Treviso and my new name is Giuseppe Bocchino. If the customs ask me anything Lucky is going to tell them I’m a deaf mute which is probably a good idea as me spouting “Pizza! Mafia! Mortadella! Fatti i cazzi tuoi!!” is not going to get us very far.

So, we’re off today. Flying to Milan and then onwards to Lucky’s hometown of Livorno. I might even go for a swim.

I know Mrs Lucky’s ex will be.

See you in a few days.