Janey mac, me shirt is black…
Posted in Old blogger by Twenty Major on August 8th, 2005
An old Dublin rhyme: Janey mac, me shirt is black, what’ll I do for Sunday? Get into bed and cover your head and don’t get up till Monday.
Sound advice you have to say.
‘Janey mac’ is used as an expression of astonishment or surprise, such as:
“Janey mac, I wonder who cut the head off that African man and dumped his corpse in the canal.”
or
“Janey mac, did I really hit that traveller with my car?”
You don’t really hear people say ‘Janey mac’ any more. It’s probably because proper swearing is much more acceptable now that in used to be. Now instead of ‘Janey mac’ we say ‘FUCKIN’ ‘ELL’ or ‘JAYSUS!’
I once knew a girl called Jane McCartney, no relation to talented Beatle and stump fucker Paul, you’ll be happy to know. People used to always tease her by saying ‘Janey mac’ to her a lot which wasn’t as offensive as saying “Hey Harelip! Fancy a carrot?” to her but it did get quite annoying and one day she clobbered Anto Shields around the face with her brother’s hurley, knocked most of his teeth out and left him a nice scar on his top lip.
“That’ll teach you to call me Harelip!” she yelled as made him one of his own.
“But he called you Janey mac” piped up little David Kenny.
“DON’T TELL ME WHAT I SAID” she howled and chased him around the streets for an hour trying to bash his head in. Most people gave up calling her Janey mac after that.
She left Dublin when she was around 17 to go work in London and then we heard she was a beggar working in Victoria Station. Jimmy the Bollix said he saw her when he spent his time living in there and shouted out ‘Janey mac!’ as a security guard was walking past her. She battered him to within an inch of his life before passers-by rescued him.
She died not long after when she found accomodation in a shelter and was being helped get her life back together. She was on the bottom bunk when an enormously girthsome woman collapsed the top one and crushed her to death.
Her final words? You guessed it.
“Fat cunt.”
Bane says:
Oh, how I larfed!
Thanks, twenty.
August 7th, 2005 at 11:51 pm
Fiachra Davison says:
Yeah I knew a Jane McGee once, silly bitch died in a school bus crash! oh how I laughed
August 8th, 2005 at 12:08 am
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maca says:
Some of us culchies (red-necks for any yankie doodles reading) still say Janey Mac … and jaypers.
August 8th, 2005 at 8:50 am
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fatmammycat says:
My brother, who may in fact be adopted or retarded or both, uses the expression, ‘bit the hookey’, to express suprise, and ‘ah shure’ to express disappointment. Needless to say no one talks to him much. Especially me, as I know behind the faux rural tweeness is a crafty parsimonious little bugger who still probably has his comunnion money.
August 8th, 2005 at 10:20 am
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maca says:
FMC
We’d say it: “be the hokey”
August 8th, 2005 at 12:17 pm
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fatmammycat says:
Oh God Maca, his friends are worse… A few of them were at a wedding years ago and met up with a fellow class mate who was from a fairly well to do family, practically high brow. And when this chap spied my brother and his friend at the bar-where else- he went into a long winded account of his fabulous life and what he was doing with himself while my brother and his friend stood silently drinking. After about ten minutes of waffle this chap turned to my brother’s friend, slapped him on the top of the arm and said,
‘So, what are you doing with yourself these days?’
Brothers Friend-taking a sup of his pint says-
‘Not talkin’ to you anyway you cunt ya.’ And wanders off.
August 8th, 2005 at 12:46 pm
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Tommy says:
A girl that I wanted to ride badly used to say ‘Lovely day’in responce to everything. I found it indearing because, well, I wanted to ride her. Everyone else thought she was a cunt.
I never did get to sink my large one into her, the cunt.
That last bit about my large one is a lie. I’m only average. Just wanted to clear that up.
August 8th, 2005 at 1:20 pm
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Nosmo King says:
When I was a nipper,
My Ma would shout, ‘come here till I put manners on you you little pup….’
and you would comply and get the arse smacked of you..
Todays translation,
To my nieces & nephews — Come here till I kick the shit out of you,,, you little bollix.
It should be of no surprise that the general reaction to force the modern child to comply is met with ‘You are not the boss of Me’ so F Off ya kunt.
The yute of today…..
August 8th, 2005 at 4:09 pm
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jenE says:
i like when you micks say “jaypers”. it’s funny.
August 8th, 2005 at 4:19 pm
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Muff Diver says:
I like when you yanks say “Yikes”,
when I splay your anal sphincter muscle with a nine iron.
August 8th, 2005 at 5:04 pm
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jenE says:
i prefer the wood, thanks, muff.
August 8th, 2005 at 5:53 pm
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Bane says:
Mind if I putter around?
August 8th, 2005 at 8:18 pm
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Anonymous says:
I don’t know where you got the idea that Janey Mac isn’t said any more. I say it all the time, as do many people here in County Limerick. It’s good cause, you can say it in front of yer mam, and the wee kids.
And we don’t say “Japers”, it’s JAKERS. Well, where I’m from anyway.
December 23rd, 2006 at 3:26 am
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