An exchange in a city centre bar
Posted in Old blogger by Twenty Major on January 14th, 2005
Says I to the lounge girl, “Four pints of Guinness, two Jamesons with water, a gin and tonic, a bottle of Holsten Pils, three pints of Bulmers, two Heineken, six Carlsberg and a vodka and diet Coke”
Says she looking at me funny“I’d better get a pen”
Says I, “Aye, that’d be a good idea. Get them drinks in before they all arrive. Bit of a leaving do for someone in work today. You know yourself.”
Says she returning with the biro, “So that’s Four pints of Guinness, two Jamesons with water, a gin and tonic, a bottle of Holsten Pils, three pints of Bulmers, two Heineken, six Carlsberg and a vodka and diet Coke?”
Says I, “No flies on you girl.”
Says she, “I’ll be back in a minute.”
Time passes….
Says she, “There’s your four Guinness and three Bulmers”
More time passes….
Says she, “There’s your six Carlsberg and three Heineken. I’ll be back with the rest in a minute.”
Very little time passes
Says she to the sight of me running out the door, “Hey, where are you going?”
Says I to myself as I lose myself in pedestrian traffic “That’ll teach you cunts for telling me I’d had enough the last time I was in here.”
Anonymous says:
The short version:
Pretentious Loser walks into a pub.
Does something stupid.
Leaves.
Oh yeah, pretends to be witty too…maybe makes a racist remark.
Much shorter to read.
a3
January 14th, 2005 at 1:04 pm
Twenty Major says:
heh - what a fucking geebag you are.
Please point out the maybe racist remark, if you wouldn’t mind.
January 14th, 2005 at 1:08 pm
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Anonymous says:
Look in any post you mention someone not Irish, doesn’t matter where. It’s all over, like a bad rash.
a3
January 14th, 2005 at 1:15 pm
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Twenty Major says:
Yesterday I said “Now I’m all for racial equality (expect for Turks and the Welsh)” - so apart from that I’m not a racist.
I even like some Canadians, hard as that is.
January 14th, 2005 at 1:17 pm
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Anonymous says:
“not irish” - if that’s a racist comment, then “not male” is sexist right?
“not gay” is homophobic etc etc.
please shut your extreme-PC trap, you feckin loser.
Ciaran..
January 14th, 2005 at 1:21 pm
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fatmammycat says:
Do you have a bad rash, Nonnnie?
Toodles
January 14th, 2005 at 1:25 pm
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Anonymous says:
Pointing out someting doesn’t make me racist Ciariana, you should know better.
a3
January 14th, 2005 at 2:35 pm
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Tommy says:
a3,have you no balls.It’s so easy to slag off someone when your nameless is it not.Why dont you put your blog address up so we can all go and wank on it.There’s only one thing worse than a cunt with no sense of humour,thats a foreign cunt with no sense of humour.
January 14th, 2005 at 3:50 pm
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Anonymous says:
I wasn’t calling you a racist, you tit.
I’ll leave it to you to make ridiculous dramatic accusations.
January 14th, 2005 at 3:54 pm
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Anonymous says:
Yes it is Tommy…how nice of you to notice. I don’t need to bother with a Blog because I live my life, no need to write about it.
“There’s only one thing worse than a cunt with no sense of humour,thats a foreign cunt with no sense of humour.”
That pretty much covers all of you from this side of the pond.
Goodnight Gracie!
a3
January 14th, 2005 at 7:59 pm
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fatmammycat says:
Now see here Nonnie, I resent being tarred with the one brush as you so glibly do whenever you’re under pressure. The thing that rankles with readers of this sight is your soapbox grandising and frankly holier-than-thou attitude. As Ciaran said, clearly you are an intelligent person, but if you fail to grasp the obvious bile inducing hatred we Irish have of anyone coming to our shore and then slagging us off, albeit in a poor and somewhat localised manner, then you have failed to grasp anything about people in general. I realise you feel you must protect Dubloon- although for the life of me I can’t think why, seems to me he’s perfectly capable of defending himself- but in doing so you leave youself open to the dislike most reader have of him.In fact more, at least Dubloon had the strength of his convictions, nonsense though they are.You are happy merely to chirp and snap and like some kind of bottom feeder on the crumbs of his arguments. And now you’ve dropped your high brow falutin’ and are using the very same language as darling Twenty, somthing youonce claimed to despise.
Heavens Nonnie, pick a fence and sit on will you, before you do yourself some harm.
Now good bye, I’m off to Paris for a weekend of debauchary with a man I barely know… but he has big feet.
Toodles
January 15th, 2005 at 12:22 pm
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Anonymous says:
how big are his feet? (I just want to know for future refernece when to be impressed)
f.
January 16th, 2005 at 3:02 am
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Anonymous says:
reference. my mistake. oops.
January 16th, 2005 at 3:04 am
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Anonymous says:
Dubloons site was amusing, and it at least had pictures that showed things as they were, now its all gone because as far as I can see 3 people decided they disliked it and got extremely personal with their attacks. Ciaran once even asked someone to throw someone from there under a truck, as if the only result you can come up with is violence and assault. It was even said here, if you don’t like it then don’t read it, but none of you left it alone and now I am down one site of amusement.
Little here is amusing…I’m still waiting.
I’m just paying my karmic debt.
Sure I started using profanity as it seems to be the only thing most of you here understand, considering the number of uses of the word “cunt”.
I went to Ireland once to visit relatives, spending many lovely days in Dublin, Cork, and other places on the West. But if its people like you that are getting of age there now, I’ll avoid it as a place to go in the future. Far as I am concerned all of you have given the Irish more of a bad name than Dubloon ever did.
a3
January 16th, 2005 at 3:59 pm
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Anonymous says:
It wasn’t a truck, it was a 15B and not only that, it was also a joke.
It was presented as a small joke, so don’t twist it, you liar.
If that shit-stirring bore, Dubloon, hadn’t ruined his own arguments with ridiculous and offensive shite, then we wouldn’t have sought to insult him back.
Anyway, if the sap can’t take a bit of mud-slinging from the three of us (it’s a hell of a lot more than three, but thanks, I’ll gladly accept more credit than I deserve), then he never had a hope.
As I’ve pointed out before, you’re doing the exact same to this site as we did to his.
The only difference being that 20 M lets you comment and also that you’re really poor and ineffctive.
I’d stop if I were you, but please, do continue.
Ciaran..
January 17th, 2005 at 10:21 am
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fatmammycat says:
Ahh back to it. Firstly Nonnie, it’s ‘coming of age.’ And secondly, having just viewed the dog-shit splattered streets and graffiti covered walls of gay old Pareeee, let me just blow a big fat raspberry to you and that nobula Dubloon. And no, his site wasn’t funny at all. F, mon toots, the only thing I can say is that the bigger the foot… the bigger the foot. Pah! The lies people tell, if only I’d known and so on. On the other hand he danced like an otter so I’m drawing the velvet drapes and taking my fat cat arse off to my leaba for about fifteen hours. Toodles. Ps. Ciaran I really love the way you managed to get the last word in on so many different days, you are truly a god among men.
January 17th, 2005 at 6:13 pm
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Anonymous says:
Thanks, Ma. I’m both thorough and obsessed.
On the internet, they’re both admiral qualities in a man
January 18th, 2005 at 5:17 pm
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Anonymous says:
admirable. dammit… admirable
Ciaran..
January 18th, 2005 at 5:20 pm
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Anonymous says:
Hilarious!
January 21st, 2005 at 2:24 pm
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fatmammycat says:
Ahhh tuna can fingers, the curse of the gifted. I once sent an email I hadn’t corrected, it went something like tis ah you van see what was all about , a total bleenin’ nightmare of mis placed tappity tap motions and forzen twitchin.
toodles.
January 21st, 2005 at 10:55 pm
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Bernard says:
If I have scrolled this far, does that mean I’m a racist? And if so, which city centre bar do I frequent to get a round as described in this post?
January 22nd, 2005 at 5:15 am
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fatmammycat says:
Anywhere on Talbot street should see you get a round first and a good kicking afterwards Bernard, and if that fails might I suggest hanging around the Submarine bar on a Tuesday evening wearing a pair of Jimmy Choo shoes and talking loudly into a mobile. That seems to really piss the locals off.
Toodles.
January 22nd, 2005 at 11:25 am
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